without Posted August 11, 2012 Share Posted August 11, 2012 I don't know why people do that? Maybe to them I look indifferent to not having one but i'm not. I do feel alone. For example one of my classmates keeps telling me she likes me (she's married)(10 years older than me) and why don't I have a BF? I have told her I haven't find one since a year and half ago (since my break up) and I don't know where to find one. But she asks again and again. And tells me to find one. Why does she do that? I already am sad and she keeps reminding me that I'm alone. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted August 11, 2012 Share Posted August 11, 2012 Ask her next time she says anything - "Do you get a kick out of making me feel bad?" Link to post Share on other sites
Author without Posted August 11, 2012 Author Share Posted August 11, 2012 Ask her next time she says anything - "Do you get a kick out of making me feel bad?" I can't. We see each other too often and I'm kind of shy to tell her that. BTW your avatar is really hot. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted August 11, 2012 Share Posted August 11, 2012 I can't. We see each other too often and I'm kind of shy to tell her that. Honey, you only have one life - don't waste it being a wall-flower. sometimes, you have to bite to get some notice, and if she keeps on at you, you're just going to start dreading seeing her. Ok, well if that's too harsh, ask her how she feels you should go about it. You're not the go-get-some type, and you're a shy person by nature. Her comments make you feel like there's something wrong with you, and they hurt.... BTW your avatar is really hot. It's great, isn't it? The artist was fond of painting pictures of sexy sassy women, who obviously had character.... His name is Gil Elvgren 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author without Posted August 11, 2012 Author Share Posted August 11, 2012 Honey, you only have one life - don't waste it being a wall-flower. sometimes, you have to bite to get some notice, and if she keeps on at you, you're just going to start dreading seeing her. Ok, well if that's too harsh, ask her how she feels you should go about it. You're not the go-get-some type, and you're a shy person by nature. Her comments make you feel like there's something wrong with you, and they hurt.... Yes.. I think I should. Well it hurts. I already don't like my life I tried everything I could and I still am trying to look better. Although I wasn't that bad to start with but my self-esteem is nearly zero. Here there aren't many places to go... Anyway life sucks either way I'm tired of beating myself up cuz I could't find anyone . It's great, isn't it? The artist was fond of painting pictures of sexy sassy women, who obviously had character.... His name is Gil Elvgren It really is. Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted August 11, 2012 Share Posted August 11, 2012 (edited) She is telling you this out of superiority, she is making herself feel better at your expense and i believe that if you look closely at her body language you will see this. There are two ways to deal with this. Either pre-emptively by lying about it or after you spilled the beans by telling her to mind her own business. Off-course you could always have some fun and tell her you are lesbian/man trapped in woman's body/asexual. Pls do the last one, it's funny [i said i was gay to my country relatives and to others]. TM, i didn't know it was made by some artist who actually made a career out of this, they are very good. I'm gonna look him up, i wonder if he got some flak in the lately as an artist because of his mix of 50's costumes and sassy/sexy. Edited August 11, 2012 by Radu Link to post Share on other sites
Author without Posted August 11, 2012 Author Share Posted August 11, 2012 Off-course you could always have some fun and tell her you are lesbian/man trapped in woman's body/asexual. That's funny I may try it. I may even feel better for myself. Pls do the last one, it's funny [i said i was gay to my country relatives and to others]. Really? To your relatives? lol Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted August 11, 2012 Share Posted August 11, 2012 That's funny I may try it. I may even feel better for myself. Really? To your relatives? lol Did you ever watch those old toons with Bugs Bunny, he would sometimes act coy, head put down, playing with hands in front of lower body and right leg angled in front of left, sometimes both legs in scissor [like girls like to sit sometimes]. Now imagine a 1.83m 130kg guy do this, and say 'well ... i really really like boys'. If you're gonna do this, i suggest you do it in private, and do it in steps of escalation. Private so someone who is actually like this doesn't think you are making fun of her sexual orientation. Imagine this, you two are having a discussion, she is showing you a guy, you are checking him out, you steadily let your eyes wonder to some girl and let your pupils dilate [think of something that entices you]. You continue to chat, and at some point you start saying how you 'like girls' .... 'really like girls'. And do that deranged smile from Silence of the Lambs that Hannibal Lecter did. http://www.thenatflap.co.uk/images/hannibal.gif - contracted pupils with full focus on the person. You could always say that you are joining a religious sect and find some weird one online, learn a bit about it and try to convert her to this sect ... make it an obvious polygyny sect ... that should freak her out. Link to post Share on other sites
Author without Posted August 11, 2012 Author Share Posted August 11, 2012 Did you ever watch those old toons with Bugs Bunny, he would sometimes act coy, head put down, playing with hands in front of lower body and right leg angled in front of left, sometimes both legs in scissor [like girls like to sit sometimes]. Now imagine a 1.83m 130kg guy do this, and say 'well ... i really really like boys'. If you're gonna do this, i suggest you do it in private, and do it in steps of escalation. Private so someone who is actually like this doesn't think you are making fun of her sexual orientation. Imagine this, you two are having a discussion, she is showing you a guy, you are checking him out, you steadily let your eyes wonder to some girl and let your pupils dilate [think of something that entices you]. You continue to chat, and at some point you start saying how you 'like girls' .... 'really like girls'. And do that deranged smile from Silence of the Lambs that Hannibal Lecter did. http://www.thenatflap.co.uk/images/hannibal.gif - contracted pupils with full focus on the person. You could always say that you are joining a religious sect and find some weird one online, learn a bit about it and try to convert her to this sect ... make it an obvious polygyny sect ... that should freak her out. You're really funny. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted August 11, 2012 Share Posted August 11, 2012 TM, i didn't know it was made by some artist who actually made a career out of this, they are very good. I'm gonna look him up, i wonder if he got some flak in the lately as an artist because of his mix of 50's costumes and sassy/sexy. No, by all accounts he was extremely popular... Here's a website or two dedicated to his work, and a small bio on wiki... sorry to threadjack, without.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author without Posted August 11, 2012 Author Share Posted August 11, 2012 sorry to threadjack, without.... No problem , TM . Link to post Share on other sites
Leegh Posted August 11, 2012 Share Posted August 11, 2012 I've had similar questions from a woman at work. When I mention that I am going on vacation, she'll ask me if I'm going alone. I say yes, because that's the truth. In addition, sometimes she'll say to me, "well couldn't you go with a group, tour, etc.). It makes me feel like a real loner when she makes it a point that I'm going alone. Personally, I think it's rude to ask someone if they're going alone on a vacation, unless it's your mother asking you. I had done a lot of traveling with an old boyfriend, and I don't mind traveling alone now. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author without Posted August 11, 2012 Author Share Posted August 11, 2012 I've had similar questions from a woman at work. When I mention that I am going on vacation, she'll ask me if I'm going alone. I say yes, because that's the truth. In addition, sometimes she'll say to me, "well couldn't you go with a group, tour, etc.). It makes me feel like a real loner when she makes it a point that I'm going alone. Personally, I think it's rude to ask someone if they're going alone on a vacation, unless it's your mother asking you. I had done a lot of traveling with an old boyfriend, and I don't mind traveling alone now. Yes I think its rude too. Even if they really don't mean anything. It makes the other person uncomfortable and in my case sad, urs too. Link to post Share on other sites
Coffee20 Posted August 11, 2012 Share Posted August 11, 2012 People ask me similar questions. When I don't have a bf almost every of my friend asks me whether I found a new one or why I don't have one, even immediately after BU. I don't find it rude. I always answer that I want to spend some time alone or if there is no good friend or bf to go with me then I can be by myself too. But sometimes it's annoying. Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted August 11, 2012 Share Posted August 11, 2012 Do you girls also have relatives who press you with 'when are you getting married ?' ? Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted August 11, 2012 Share Posted August 11, 2012 Jeesh! You have NO idea....! My ex and I were distributing slices of wedding cake at our reception - and someone asked me when we were going to have kids....! i replied - "I'll have to see if this place has a private room.... !" Link to post Share on other sites
SpiralOut Posted August 12, 2012 Share Posted August 12, 2012 I would say something like, "I really enjoy the way you keep telling me that I need a boyfriend." Link to post Share on other sites
Leegh Posted August 23, 2012 Share Posted August 23, 2012 Whenever someone asks me about why my ex and I broke up, etc., or refers to a past relationship as to why I'm not married, etc., I have found a good way to avoid saying anything is to say "Oh, that's a long story", and it's best to say it in a way where they can sense that you don't want to talk about it. Usually they will back off from any more questions. Link to post Share on other sites
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