thinking about leaving home...

[Ugoff]

Thinking about leaving home...

 

For the last couple of weeks(since summer( I have been SERIOUSLY thinking about leaving home(been on my mind since forever). The situation is somewhat complicated, I am a 17 years old guy who just finnished high school(barely graduated), i am totally messed up in every spect, i am not certain as what my future would be. i would think i am in a very dysfunctional family. My dad cheats on my mom and he beats on her on many occassions, even got in jail once for that. my mom can not make any decisions and are VERY emotional, somehow she still tries to hang on desperately on my dad. i've been verbally/physically abused by both parents ever since the last 8 years(i was living with my grandma until i was 9.) and they also have very strict controls on my freedom ranging from everything possible. i would love to elaborate but it'd be too long. the problem is I can not focus on my school and the future ahead living my life in such a mess.

 

I have met my girlfriend for over a year now since i first saw her when we were volunteering on Canada Day, she is 20 years old by herself studying in Canada. we share alot in common including common place of birth. Over the year we have grown to love each other deeply, she is committed into having a life with me. She stayed here when she originally planned to attend an university on the other side jsut because of me. We have plans to both find work here and start our family, etc. I had discussed with her and her close friend about me leaving home to live with her. She is afraid of my family problems how my family will hate her and me if i left, etc. however i am willing to let it all go to get away from my parents and pursue my own course. Financing wont be a problem since we'd be sharing accomodation with her and her friend, and she cooks, clean, etc. sometimes she's like a big sister to me than my sweet little gf when in bed. education/training can be taken care from student loan. a job would pay for this until i get my training and move up the hourly wages.

 

I am very hardbent on leaving home, but all the opinions i get from gf/friends is "talk to your parents" I have tried before on many occasions, including talks with several relatives together WITHh my parents to solve family problems. I feel it did not work, not even improve and therefore i am rejecting the idea of talking to them openly again before i finally decide to leave. I can not ffind the courage to talk to them about this situation. Let alone the fact i am in such a relationship with my gf. I can leave secretly at night since my dad sleeps at his gf's house and my mom is living overseas. man i like my dad's gf much better than my parents since she is much easier to talk to and understanding.

 

i am in desperate need of more advice, anyone? does my dream sound too optimistic?

[Olivia_19742004]

I'm a little confused. How does your father beat your mother when she is living overseas? It doesn't appear that your father has as much hold on your mother if she's not even living in the same house with him and he's living with a girlfriend. Some of what you're saying is a little confusing. Are you living with your father and his girlfriend? Why don't you go overseas with your mother?

[Ugoff]

it indeed does sound very confusing,

 

well my parents aren't seperated but my dad is living with me and my mom is living with my lil bro somewhere else. they moved apart since a year ago because of many reasons. my dad lives at home but he always sleeps at his gf's place which is in another place nearby, bout a 15 min drive

[Olivia_19742004]

So if your mom doesn't live in your house and your father always sleeps at his girlfriend's house why do you need to move out? Sounds like you have the house to yourself.