Drifting Apart

[Flamed]

My girlfriend entered a intensive medical sales program 6 weeks ago. We have been seeing eachother since July. She is 31 and i am 43. This training requires she study almost non-stop about drugs as she has no background in medicine.

 

Anyway she is never available to get together. In fact we have been talking less as she gets deeper in this program. She has 4 weeks left. i have sent her voice messages to her hotel where she must stay in town here and let her know how i care. Last we were together was on my birthday 2 weeks ago. i was exhausted from recent work projects and after dinner went back to her place. Anyway we layed together on her bed and watched a movie. i didnt want to be aggressive that night as i just wanted to be close. She may have took it wrong that i didnt want her and felt rejected.

 

Now she has been creating distance. i sent her a dozen roses a week after this happened. Then last week i delivered a caring card to her hotel. She called me after getting both gifts and was appreciative. But was too busy to make any weekend plans with me, since she needed to study.

 

These are 2 emails she sent that indicate her thoughts. First one shown below she sent just before starting this training. Next more recently is her thoughts with this distance building up. If any females out there can give me some input on how to keep things alive, please comment to help me get things back on track. Read her emails to me next.

 

Subj: Home

 

Date: Sun, 10 Sep 2000

 

From: Ramona

 

To: Jimmy

 

Hi Honey. I just got home from Denise's. I'm going to eat now. Honey,I need to be really focused for the next 10 weeks. Which will be a challenge in and of itself. I also need to do very well. If it seems that I'm isolating myself don't take it personally. I just need to be strong and sometimes I need to go through things alone or whatever, it's hard to explain. I hope to be in good spirits when I talk to you and see you over these weeks. Just hang on for me okay.? Talk to you soon. PS- Be careful with the your and you're. Look at your last e-mail to me. XXOO

 

Subj: Quick Reply

 

Date: Mon, 23 Oct 2000

 

From: Ramona

 

To: Jimmy

 

Jimmy, I just don't have time to respond or talk. I should be studying right now. I'll be brief. I'm sorry if I was nasty. I was angry at you and you made me realize that. Now I'm not so angry anymore. However, I've grown away and never having felt that I loved you, you can probably understand how I feel with 6 weeks being apart. You are a nice person with caring qualities. I will think things through clearly when I am done with this training in 4 weeks. Please don't expect calls. Be well. Ramona PS- We didn't have plans to play volleyball today/Sunday. What are you referring to?

[Tony T]

Well, you asked for a comment from a girl but after reading this, even though I am a guy, I have to put my two cents in. Simply ignore it if you choose.

 

I would write her off in a heartbeat. After dating for three months, she could write you a bit warmer Email than this.

 

First, if you explained to her your exhaustion on the night you spent with her for your birthday and she still got angry, she is not worth your time. If you did not explain and just rejected her, shame on you.

 

Second, her second Email strongly indicates that she is pushing away from you and is no longer interested in persuing any meaningful relationship with you. She doesn't want to call you and she wants to wait until after her studies to decide exactly what how she wants to handle your butt.

 

She also said she didn't have time to respond or talk. Hey, the most powerful man on the planet found time to get oral sex from his intern in the White House Oval Office, found time to buy her gifts, call her, meet her, give depositions, and keep his but from being kicked out of office because of her. This is the busiest man in America. And she can't find time to give you a quick phone call...phewy!!!! Bull!!!

 

Sure, she is going through a stressful and intense time but that's no reason for her to be cold to you. If this is how she handles stress, you don't need her in your life.

 

I think you should jump four weeks ahead of her by giving some thought to how you want to handle her. If you have any kind of self worth or self esteem, you will start seeking other more caring women for yourself...and there are MANY. You couldn't have done worse. She is one of the more selfish and self centered you could have found. In this particular case, there is obviously an excellent reason why she is single...she is a bxtch.

 

Now, that's my take on this. Hopefully some ladies will give you their opinions, which could be lots more valid that mine. I don't take PMS or hormonal imbalances as an excuse for rude behavior anymore. I don't think there is any excuse for rudeness or coldness...but others may feel differently.

[Annie]

Well, you asked for a comment from a girl but after reading this, even though I am a guy, I have to put my two cents in. Simply ignore it if you choose.

 

I think I missed something here from reading her first letter. She asked him to be careful of his use of your and you're. Sounds like some superior intelligence attitude creeping in to me. Just a thought.

[Tony T]

Annie has posted a message to you which is entitled: "Drifted Apart" It is a number of posts above. Scroll up and have a look.

[Deejette]

She is not being very loving or caring towards you and it is all about herself. People are more important than studying for some job that she will probably be mediocre in anyway.

Annie has posted a message to you which is entitled: "Drifted Apart" It is a number of posts above. Scroll up and have a look.