ginnie Posted July 16, 2004 Share Posted July 16, 2004 I have been seeing guy now for about almost 2 years. I have allot fun with him and he makes me laugh allot. We started out as friends and then grew into something more. So after a year started living together. He came from bad experience with divorce. He is going threw a custody battle. Anyways, he had allot of issues to deal with, but he dealt with allot of them before I came into to the picture. I have children myself from previous relationship, but never married. Anyways, here is my problem I am finding with him. He is very unemotionally attached. What I mean, he has a very hard time showing affection. I barely get hug or kiss out of him, especially in the beginning. I would go to bed thinking what's wrong with me. We ended up breaking up over the whole thing, then got back together. I told to him I deserve more and I can't put up with someone being so cold. He said he would change his ways. which he has to certain extinct. In result I have become very insecure. I keep thinks he just with me because he comfortable and he really doesn't care about me. Sadness thing about it, He has never told me he loved me yet. He said he cares for me deeply, but he just not ready yet. I know this women meant allot to him before, told me when were friends in the past , that he put her on petal stool, she was everything to him, then she turned around left him. I must be fool, because I never put up with this kind garbage before with a man. I don't know why I am now. He said In time he will be able to tell me he loves me. I have so much insecure feelings, that I am starting to get angry over stupid things. There was this girl he was seeing at the same time before we were committed, but it didn't last, because he chose me. I told him straight out, that there is to many men out there to share one man with another women. So he decided to choose me. I keep getting mad over this girl, in my head, because of certain reason. last year about in July, my grandmother passed away. I was supposed to go home with him, but I had to attend my grandmother funeral. I found out later, he took her home the same weekend when I was attending my grandmother funeral. It hurts me still till day. I don't speak about it to him, because he gets mad when I even try and bring it up. I am starting to get allot of resentment toward him. I don't know if I am just being stupid or I have real reason to feel this way. I dun no, its getting bad were I think when he leaves with his friends that something is up, but I never tell him this stuff, I just keep it to my self. At times I feel like breaking up with him, not to feel this way anymore, I think is it worth it. I know he not fooling around on me, but the damage is done already and I don't know if I can get past it. I thinking of telling him, If he can't tell me he loves me, then maybe we shouldn't be even together anymore, till he knows what he wants. I hate feeling this way towards him, cause when we are both happy, we get along really well. Sometimes I think I should of never crossed the line and left it as friends...... b] Link to post Share on other sites
rhonda Posted July 16, 2004 Share Posted July 16, 2004 As the song says "breaking up is hard to do" but it sounds like you have already made your choice. At this point the only reason to stay together is if you're considering marriage (it should be the easiest decision in your life). Instead of Celine Dions "All by myself" I recommend another song that goes. . . . "Got along without ya before I met ya, gonna get along without ya now" Link to post Share on other sites
jw32802 Posted July 16, 2004 Share Posted July 16, 2004 Tell him how you feel and that you want to break it off. He will start to miss you and think of all the things he did wrong (if he truly loves you). Get the book "makeup, dont breakup" by bonnie eaker weil, it will help Link to post Share on other sites
Author ginnie Posted July 21, 2004 Author Share Posted July 21, 2004 Thank you both for reply. I have decided that the best thing is to talk to him about how I feel... Then we well see were that goes. Thanks again. Link to post Share on other sites
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