Cassie123 Posted July 16, 2004 Share Posted July 16, 2004 Hello, my b/f and I have been together now for about 3 years and engaged for about 2 months now. My problem is he seems to be acting kind of distant. I actually started to notice this way before we ever got engaged. He doesn't seem to communicate with me like he used too. We used to be able to talk about things, and now he doesn't have alot to say. I told him that I noticed he was acting distant, and he told me he thought I was acting the same way. I then said that, that wasn't so, and if I did it was because I was wondering what was going on with him. He told me he was sorry hadn't really reaized he had been that way. So a few weeks go by and things seem to be ok, then out of the blue he starts acting distant again. Not wanting to talk, not wanting to do anything much, just kinda wants to lay around like hes depressed or something. Then all of a sudden his cell phone rings about 11:45 pm, I'm almost asleep on the couch, we had been watching a movie. He jumps up and races to the phone. I heard him answer and say, "I'm sorry you have the wrong number." After that he comes in the living room where I am, and acts completely different, like hes now happy. When he fell asleep I checked the number in the cell and called it back. It was a woman. When she answered she didn't even say hello, she said,'What took you so long to call me back?" I was so shocked I hung the phone up. This was just a few days ago. Surely this woman has talked to him since then and asked, why he(Me) hung up on her. He acts all happy though. I haven't mentioned it to him yet. Just wondering if people have any advice on how to confront him. I'm almost positive, I now know why he was distant. He has someone else. Please tell me some things to say. I'm so nervous. Thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
StartingAgain Posted July 16, 2004 Share Posted July 16, 2004 Why haven't you mentioned it to him? He's cheating on you and, obviously, you need to break off the engagement at the very least until the two of you get this straight. Then you talk about why he can't be faithful to you. How old are the two of you? Sorry, but I would never marry someone I caught screwing around on me while engaged to be married. If he can't keep it in his pants now, he certainly won't be able to a few years after the wedding. Link to post Share on other sites
Matilda Posted July 16, 2004 Share Posted July 16, 2004 I can understand you being nervous. I think you're just going to have to tell him about the phone call. I also agree that you should break off the engagement, and I also think that if you want to try and continue your relationship with this man, you should go to couples counseling. Sometimes it helps me to write down what I'm going to say before hand, if I'm very nervous about something, and that way I can get my thoughts in order. I'm sorry you are having to go through this, and I hope the best for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Cassie123 Posted July 16, 2004 Share Posted July 16, 2004 Thanks for the replys. He will be home shortly, and we are supossed to be going out to dinner. I'll go ahead and say something to him then about the call. As far as breaking off the engagement that is probably a good idea too. I hate to do that so much, but I'd rather do it now and maybe try and fix this if we can before we do get married, or IF we get married. Thanks again. Link to post Share on other sites
StartingAgain Posted July 17, 2004 Share Posted July 17, 2004 Good thinking, Cassie. Hope things went well for you last evening. Link to post Share on other sites
Cassie123 Posted July 20, 2004 Share Posted July 20, 2004 I spoke with him the other night about everything. He says that the woman on the phone was someone he worked with, a friend, and that he had missed talking with her since she had been out of town on buisness. I told him that the engagement was off until he found out what he truely wanted. I also told him that if he can be that upset or depressed because his 'friend" was out of town, to the point where it was causing him to ignore me, not talk and communicate that much, then he must have feelings for her, more so than for me. He didn't say a word. So the engagement is off, and we shall see how things go. Link to post Share on other sites
RoboHobo Posted July 20, 2004 Share Posted July 20, 2004 I'm truly sorry Cassie, I hope that it all works out okay. Either way you did the right thing, you'll be okay. You sound strong, try to stay positive. Link to post Share on other sites
Cassie123 Posted July 20, 2004 Share Posted July 20, 2004 Thanks Robo, I appreciate that. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts