I think I'm falling for an escort??

[EHguy]

For the record I am not trying to "save" this girl. I do not want to make her my gf. I do not think of her less because she is a escort. It is possible that she could develop stronger feelings for me too. She is not a robot like Robert said and neither am I. I am just seeking advice on how to get past this feeling of infatuation with this girl because I know there could never exist anything serious between us. She could end up falling for me but no way would I allow myself to be with her. That's why I plan on keeping it "strictly business". I say that deep down the main reason why I would like to continue seeing her is because I feel comfortable with her and could possibly learn some things about intimacy and gain an insight into what a woman likes in bed. Remember I've never had a gf and so I'm afraid I'll screw up with a girl I'm really, truly into in the future

[irin]

I do not want to make her my gf.

 

I am just seeking advice on how to get past this feeling of infatuation with this girl because I know there could never exist anything serious between us. She could end up falling for me but no way would I allow myself to be with her.

 

why not? you never know she might end up being your wife, if you like her, then why not?

 

I say that deep down the main reason why I would like to continue seeing her is because I feel comfortable with her and could possibly learn some things about intimacy and gain an insight into what a woman likes in bed. Remember I've never had a gf and so I'm afraid I'll screw up with a girl I'm really, truly into in the future

 

 

sorry but you not going to learn anything about intimacy from hookers, please dont ever try anything you learned from a hooker on other women.

[Charlie Harper]

sorry but you not going to learn anything about intimacy from hookers, please dont ever try anything you learned from a hooker on other women

 

AMEN TO THAT

 

SincereOnlineGuy you are right in most of your post I used to give counseling and therapy to Escorts, and you are not very far from the truth, yes you cannot say they are mindless robots, but they need to have a split personality to do what they do.

 

Nobody in their right mind would have sex with strangers for free all the time if money was not involved.

 

To the OP forget about her....no matter what.

[SincereOnlineGuy]

I am just seeking advice on how to get past this feeling of infatuation with this girl

 

 

 

Well that's easy!

 

 

You just dial the next number down the page.

 

 

Problem solved.

[niknak]

Hello All,

Noob here. I was searching for some online thoughts about my current situation and stumbled across this thread.

 

Much like the OP I have fallen in love with an escort girl. Here is some background.

 

I have known her for the last 7 years, and would see her for paid "dates" every few months. Sometimes more frequently, sometimes less, but I always enjoyed our time together. She seemed to like me too. I know the whole escort experience is somewhat of an "illusion" in that you are paying them to pretend they care, etc. I always felt close to her emotionally but at some point about a year ago I sensed something had changed. She was opening up and talking to me about her personal life, and her feelings.

Long story short, I asked her out for a "normal" date to go to a concert. She told me she couldn't go at night but she agreed to meet me for lunch one day. She told me she wasn't "free" she was married to a jerk who managed to abuse her and land in jail. She is in the process of divorcing him. Since he is out of the picture for now she has become more attached to me. I helped her move to a new apartment, and have begun to spend 5 or 6 nights a week overnight with her. We go out and do the things "normal" couples do - restaurants, movies, shopping, etc. Of course I no longer pay her and we have a great time sexually. She's even talking about marriage in the future.

When I bring up her profession, she says she needs to earn as much money as she can now as she will need it to live in the future. Although I have a steady job with a good income she can make 4 or 5 times as much as I can in a month. She said I shouldn't worry about what she does, that when she makes love to me it's from her heart.

In summary, other than what she does for a living, we are very compatible in our likes, dislikes, favorite hobbies, etc.

I'd just like some opinions on where you guys think this is going. Is it possible she wants a "normal" relationship or is she just setting me up for a huge disappointment? When I bring up the money issue, she says she doesn't care if I'm rich or poor only that we are "compatible" She says she wants to get out of the business by the time she's 40 which is still 7 years away. Do you think I can remain sane enough to endure the next 7 years knowing what she does for a living? Thanks to all !

[Escort]

A prostitute offers sex.

 

A talented escort offers a physical, emotional, mental and spiritual connection. An escort hones her emphatic abilities so the experience is genuine. She relates to you in a way where you feel fulfilled in many different ways unlike a real relationship has offered. She inspires you to become a better person. She validates the wonderful things about you. You have subtle conflicts because she has high standards of you. The day to day drudgery that can exist in long term relationship is not present, even if you have known her for more than a decade. She still maintains her circle of space and independence. She will not allow herself to be controlled or submit to your world. She takes care of her body, nurtures her soul, pays attention to the world, offers a sense of compassion for you and others.

 

Money is always a prerequisite. This is her occupation. This is her talent. This is her skill. She has invested her heart, emotions and body into becoming a high class escort. She maintains exclusivity in her choice of clients because she can.

 

A great escort is not faking anything. She is genuine with her emotions. But keep in mind, she is an independent woman and escorting has become her life. She may not feel she has many other employment options that are desirable. At a certain stage, she considers living life with a client because she desires to stop escorting, yet she wants the financial comforts that she has become accustomed to enjoying.

 

More often than not, a client will fall in love with a talented escort. Because it is very likely that he has never felt so in love, connected and appreciated as a successful man as he does with her. The escort is used to men falling in love with her. She feels on top of the world when powerful, successful businessmen and politicians desire her. She can chose how often she sees you and the emotional distance you share. When she wants you to come closer, she can become more vulnerable to you.

 

Maybe she knows your friends, family and co-workers or employees. Maybe she has been integrated into many parts of your life. However, how much do you know about her life? How many of her friends do you know? It is likely that she has kept her circle small. She may choose to reveal certain friends to you. You will understand when she tells you about the distance she feels from her family, thus since she is not close with them, you will not be invited for dinner either.

 

It is easy to fall in love with an escort. I have seen it time and time again. You will likely never find in another relationship, the qualities you find in the relationship with your escort.

 

It is very important to understand that even if you do eventually date and become exclusive, the financial prerequisite will always be there. Many men do not understand how expensive it is to become the exclusive client. They also do not understand how much time she will need alone. The escort will always have the fear that your relationship will not last. If your relationship ends, she will have needed to have put enough money away to account for the financial damage that has resulted from not cultivating other clients. She may have burned bridges with previous clients. When you cut off her pipeline, expect to pay not just for her lost income for other clients, but also for her "financial insurance" of "closing her business" in order to be with you.

 

I would estimate that the general cost to take a "perfect 10" escort off the market would be around $250,000 cash per year. Perfect 10 = amazing physical appearance, incredibly good at making you feel amazing, well-educated with a lot of worldly interests and hobbies.

 

I welcome feedback.

 

I thought I'd share the perspective of a former escort who has known other escorts. Many of the gentlemen seem to have a clear perspective on what it means to fall in love with an escort.

 

The bottom line..... understand that she became an escort as a means for income. If you met under the context of you being a client and her being an escort, your entire relationship has been built on that dynamic. Do not expect that it will change even if your feelings for each other are genuine and the two of you mutually want to pursue a relationship. Money will always need to pass from you to her. If you accept it for what it is, then it is possible to establish an arrangement that can become mutually fulfilling for life.