Would you date a overweight guy....?

[Chocolat]

- watching what he eats (dieting) and stacking supplements (over 10 different pills and 3 powders)

 

<snip>

 

 

- Short on money due to the expenses of weight loss (food, pills, gym membership)

 

 

First, congratulations on your weight loss. Losing 85 pounds takes dedication!

 

But... why are you stacking supplements? There is nothing to be gained here, unless you are in such elite condition that you really need help getting that last 1% edge. In other words, for 99% of us, we can have a good physique without supplements. Whey protein and a decent multi are about all you need, and there's debate about the multi.

 

Also, why is food more expensive now that you are eating less?

Edited August 25, 2012 by Chocolat

[kel22]

First, congratulations on your weight loss. Losing 85 pounds takes dedication!

 

But... why are you stacking supplements? There is nothing to be gained here, unless you are in such elite condition that you really need help getting that last 1% edge. In other words, for 99% of us, we can have a good physique without supplements. Whey protein and a decent multi are about all you need, and there's debate about the multi.

 

Also, why is food more expensive now that you are eating less?

 

Healthy foods cost more.

[RiverRunning]

I would date a guy who is overweight or obese (I've been both in my life, and I'm still overweight).

 

My partner now was an average weight when we met (5'5 - 5'6", about 150 pounds). Then he got up to 170 pounds. Now he's back to around 155 pounds with a bit of a belly on him. His ideal weight is probably more like 145 pounds. I have found him attractive at every weight, and his belly is adorable...

 

What isn't attractive, though? He has high blood pressure (138 - 145/80-90, usually. Mine is usually 110-115/70-75). He has high triglycerides (over 200; normal is less than 150. Mine is 99). He has high total cholesterol (about 250; less than 200 is normal. Mine's 164). He also has low HDL, or good cholesterol (34; mine is 58, which is quite good. I'm trying to get mine above 60 for the heart-protective benefits).

 

A partner who isn't active and doesn't watch what he eats is less attractive than a partner who does. I am worried about my partner's health because presently - even though I am more overweight than he is - he's not taking care of himself.

 

He's not even 30 and he has high cholesterol and high blood pressure. Not outrageously high, but high enough that it's likely only going to get worse with another 5 or 10 years.

 

But even when he was thin, he probably still had high cholesterol and high blood pressure. He never works out and doesn't watch what he eats (although his eating habits aren't that bad).

 

We switched to a vegetarian diet a few months ago (although we ate white meat, sparingly, before), so I'm hoping that will help him.

 

In any case, most people are going to see you if you're overweight and conclude that you don't take care of yourself. You will have to work harder to get your foot in the door and to show that you're not just sitting on your butt. Even then, a lot of people just aren't attracted to fat people.

 

Remember no matter what that you are caring for your health. Even if you never drop another pound, focusing on what you eat and how often you exercise is only going to help guarantee a long life.

[Chocolat]

Healthy foods cost more.

 

That's a myth. There are many healthy foods that are quite inexpensive. Beans and legumes are nutritional powerhouses, for instance, and they are among the cheapest foods you can buy.

[Star Gazer]

Depends on how overweight we're talking about here.

[Lauriebell82]

Depends on how he looks at 30-40 lbs overweight. Some men carry weight better then others depending on body build, muscle mass, height, ect.

 

That being said, I like to date the muscular type with a little meat on their bones. My husband is very muscular, but not real fat or thin. In the middle I would say.

 

It doesn't sound like you are quite at your target weight right now OP, so why don't you focus on that for the time being. Make it your project for right now, not finding a girlfriend. Heck you may meet the girl of your dreams at the gym when you least expect it! I met my husband at the gym, so it can happen.

[Nyla]

Thick men rule!

 

My husband is about 25 pounds overweight. He carries it well due to his height of 6'2.

 

I see my husband's weight gain in his broad shoulders and belly. I don't mind it at all.

 

If he was very short, the extra weight would look repulsive.

 

We have both gained since we met five years ago; still find each other sexy.

Edited September 9, 2012 by Nyla

[Moonless sky]

I most certainly would. In my situation it really is about how we connect and how our personalities match up. Of course, I do need to be attracted to the guy still but I don't mind them being over weight at all. Don't believe there are no attractive women that like bigger guys, it's just not true. Don't let your weight get to you so much either ;].

 

In the end better yourself for you and no one else.

[ASG]

Having dated an obese guy... No, I wouldn't.

 

His overweight ended up being a problem in our relationship (we're talking over 100lbs overweight here), in the way that he was always complaining about pains here and there and how he always felt tired blah blah blah... AND I couldn't say anything about it. he "warned" me early on that his weight and his eating would not be a topic of discussion, as it would lead to a major falling out.

I complied, and tried to be supportive about his feeble attempts to eat better (or rather, less! He didn't eat badly exactly, just WAY too much!), but the truth is, he never lost ANY weight. In fact, since we broke up, I'm pretty sure he gained quite a bit, as he now seems HUGE!

 

SO... yeah... I now have a bit of an issue with (severely) overweight guys as potential dates. being 20-40lbs overweight is different though. I don't mind a few extra pounds (I am about 20lbs away from my ideal weight as well, though I wouldn't be considered overweight, as per the BMI thingy), they can be sexy as well!

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

No. If he was losing weight though he can call me when it's lost.. I don't need a guy to be totally ripped but like he needs to not be fat either

[IcedEarth]

No. If he was losing weight though he can call me when it's lost.. I don't need a guy to be totally ripped but like he needs to not be fat either

 

Overweight doesn't mean morbidly obese. He can be muscular and be overweight.

[ImperfectionisBeauty]

Overweight doesn't mean morbidly obese. He can be muscular and be overweight.

 

Oh well I mean if he wasn't morbidly obese then sure

[Moonless sky]

Having dated an obese guy... No, I wouldn't.

 

His overweight ended up being a problem in our relationship (we're talking over 100lbs overweight here), in the way that he was always complaining about pains here and there and how he always felt tired blah blah blah... AND I couldn't say anything about it. he "warned" me early on that his weight and his eating would not be a topic of discussion, as it would lead to a major falling out.

I complied, and tried to be supportive about his feeble attempts to eat better (or rather, less! He didn't eat badly exactly, just WAY too much!), but the truth is, he never lost ANY weight. In fact, since we broke up, I'm pretty sure he gained quite a bit, as he now seems HUGE!

 

SO... yeah... I now have a bit of an issue with (severely) overweight guys as potential dates. being 20-40lbs overweight is different though. I don't mind a few extra pounds (I am about 20lbs away from my ideal weight as well, though I wouldn't be considered overweight, as per the BMI thingy), they can be sexy as well!

 

I find your post rude and inconsiderate. I don't think you should've ever dated the guy. It seems like you had a problem with it from the beginning. Oh well, not everyone is like this of course.

[ASG]

I find your post rude and inconsiderate. I don't think you should've ever dated the guy. It seems like you had a problem with it from the beginning. Oh well, not everyone is like this of course.

 

Rude??? I didn't have a problem with it. HE did. And he made it into a problem WE had because he was always too tired to do ANYTHING with ME!

I went into the relationship not caring that he was obese. I didn't go into it thinking I was gonna make him diet and lose all the weight (though he could have done with losing at least some, considering he is over 100lbs overweight, which is not healthy). I was ok with it.

 

But then he would complain, EVERY. SINGLE. DAY that he was fat and that he was in pain and that he was too tired and that he was not sleeping well and HE would attribute all that to his own weight.

 

So no, I didn't have a problem with it from the beginning. I developed one as the relationship progressed. And as such I will now say that I will NEVER again date someone who is THAT overweight.

[kiss_andmakeup]

Probably not.

 

My ex was a bit overweight when we first started dating, but he carried his weight well and I still found him attractive. By the end of our relationship I estimate he had gained about 50 lbs. While not the bottom-line ending factor in our relationship, it was a serious issue. I wouldn't want to go through that again.

 

I'm an active person...I need to be with someone who can do those things with me. Not to mention the physical attraction, which is a huge factor. I began to shy away from sex with him as I found his body extremely unattractive. I'm very slim/slender myself so I look for people who are at least within the realm of "normal" body weight.

[IcedEarth]

I'm glad my girlfriend doesn't require me to be active to date me

 

I can't be too active, my body is screwed. Weird couples that jog together and stuff give me the willies.

 

Being lazy is way better!

[pink_sugar]

Depends on the guy. Build really matters. Some guys look better with more of a husky build...some guys look better with a slim/slender build. I've seen men with small but not short overall stature who have flab and potbellies at 160lbs and I've seen 180lb men who look a little overweight, but in grate shape.

[IcedEarth]

I kind of suspected this. I've seen some fat, pear shaped slobs who women like just because they are tall. However if you're under 5'10 you better look like Adonis.

 

hahaha, this forum is a terrible place to judge what women women.

 

No offense ladies, but you know it's true. I see so many "perfect" women who jog for 8 hours a day and need a man with a Doctorate making 100k who jogs just as much.

 

It's unrealistic.

[soccerrprp]

Overweight doesn't mean morbidly obese. He can be muscular and be overweight.

 

I don't believe anyone is thinking of 'overweight' by this standard. In fact, i've never heard of anyone equate someone who is muscular as being overweight.

 

I prefer ladies who are as active as I am, but a little extra is fine. It needs to be proportional weight distribution and she must be health conscious.

 

Come on, it's only reasonable to expect that your partner take of his/herself if they are attracted to and expect you to do the same.

[IcedEarth]

I don't believe anyone is thinking of 'overweight' by this standard. In fact, i've never heard of anyone equate someone who is muscular as being overweight.

 

I prefer ladies who are as active as I am, but a little extra is fine. It needs to be proportional weight distribution and she must be health conscious.

 

Come on, it's only reasonable to expect that your partner take of his/herself if they are attracted to and expect you to do the same.

 

It's the definition of overweight by BMI standards anyway. I personally think BMI is a joke on an individual level, but it's the only real worldwide thing anyone from any corner of the world could compare it too.

 

Currently I'm "Overweight" but BMI says I need to weigh between 130 something and 170 something. I've never, ever weighed below 170 and my normal is 15lbs over their HIGHEST point for me.

 

So what is overweight then? Super fat? Obese? Chubby? What are we calling it?