Consolidated Discussion - A man's/woman's height in the search for relationships

[ChessPieceFace]

what hes arguing is patently false. There is more than enough research of people of the past and present (across many different countries) to show that women are sexually drawn to men taller than themselves.

 

Yep. Of course I don't have a problem with preferences like that - I do have a problem with hypocrisy though. I'm generally most attracted to women who are in the range of (-4 in) to (+0 in) compared with my own height. That probably compares well with women's attraction the other way around. I'm also average or slightly taller than average height, and consider myself pretty much the perfect height.

 

Thing is - womens' height isn't a deal breaker for me. It's true that for some reason, nearly all of the girls that openly liked me have been QUITE short compared to me (probably -1 foot or more), but it wasn't the main reason I didn't like them. They were also otherwise unattractive, annoying, airheaded, desperate, etc. Not all were all of those things, but most were. However, I've also fallen hard for girls that were pretty short (-6 in or more compared to my height)

 

For height to be a deal breaker - that's shallow. Which, I guess, is also fine - but then at least admit that you're shallow.

[thefooloftheyear]

In my entire extended family, I cant recall a single man over 5-11..If we believe the garbage that s being espoused on here to be "gospel". then we all should be a pack of losers that are unsuccessful in business and with women..Nothing could be further from the truth. Each and every one of us is very successful and well adjusted. ALL have nice looking wives and girlfriends and nice families..

 

Surely at least one of us would have wound up home alone and working for Burger King? ....Nope..

 

Point being is stop making excuses for why things dont work out in your life. Im sure President Obama must have heard a million times why a black guy would never make it big in politics...How did that work out?

 

Are there close minded, idiotic women who view height as a "dealbreaker",?..Sure, but who gives a flying fck about them anyway? They'll wind up "settling" in the end because they put too much emphasis on something that frankly isnt that important in todays society..

 

All I can say is Thank God the whole world doesnt think this way...

 

To

[thefooloftheyear]

Its very easy for men to feel insecure about their height. Its such a huge deal breaker now days but its something men can't change so we feel inadequate. I'm 5'11 so I'm on the borderline but I still have girls tower over me. Even at work a great deal of people just tower straight over me.

 

I can't help but feel a little bitter when I see some massive guy with a smoking hot but tall as hell female. Like I said earlier we can lose weight, gain muscle, get a new style and up our games in quite a few ways but when there's a deal breaker that we can do nothing about it gets to us because not matter how short a guy is he was to feel dominant.

 

Dominance and "Alpha" ness, which is what I think you are referring to has nothing to do with height...Youre off target.

 

TFY

[Revolver]

Because women of all ages races and backgrounds prefer tall men.

[skydiveaddict]

These are 16 year old kids. Of course they're going to have other girlfriends and boyfriends over the next umpteen years - tall or not. Jeez.

 

But the same formula exists throughout life. Girls are attracted to taller, confident, successful men. It's even more evident among girls in their 20's and 30's who wish to get married and have kids. The weight/height/success dynamic becomes even more important to them then. It is undeniable.

[skydiveaddict]

Dominance and "Alpha" ness, which is what I think you are referring to has nothing to do with height...Youre off target.

 

TFY

 

It has a great deal to do with it. You're either trying to be nice or you're not being honest.

[SJC2008]

When you get rejected you become insecure and focus on a "flaw" so when a short person struggles with women his reason is because he's short. I have yet to come accross a short man IRL who has struggled with women. Not to say they did well or were players but every man I've met that was 5'5" or shorter has either had a gf or had one.

[TouchedByViolet]

I'm 5'8" and have always liked my height. Sometimes I wonder if my mediocre dating life would have been better if I was taller, meh. If a guy is less than 5'7" I can understand their frustration in the dating environment. I have seen women act poorly to short men and the additional struggles they have.

[skydiveaddict]

Skydiveaddict, how tall are you?

 

Ie. are you a bitter midget or a tall bully?

 

I'm 6'1". And I'm neither of those. I'm simply stating undeniable facts.

[thefooloftheyear]

It has a great deal to do with it. You're either trying to be nice or you're not being honest.

 

 

Dont draw conclusions about me..You dont know anything about me..

 

Im a VERY confident guy and not a single moment in my entire life..Business, personal or anything else have I encountered any issues because I am "short"...Save it for the other crying asses on here..

 

Sheesh....

 

TFY

[MomsSpaghetti]

Because height is a factor in attraction. Thats why.

 

C'mon. It's more than just a factor. Male height has a unique place in the realm of physical traits. There's a reason it generates so much discussion here. Nothing can make or break you like height can.

 

It feels like such an arbitrary strike against you when you're a 5'7.5" dude who is decently handsome, lean, good skin tone, immaculately clean-cut. I'm taller than 86% of women, so the whole norm of the girl being shorter than the guy should still hold true for all but a small percentage of women. I know for a fact that if I could tweak this one dimension of myself by as little as 3", it would quadruple my dating options. That's not a delusion I'm under. I've derived this conclusion from careful observation.

[kaylan]

Yep. Of course I don't have a problem with preferences like that - I do have a problem with hypocrisy though. I'm generally most attracted to women who are in the range of (-4 in) to (+0 in) compared with my own height. That probably compares well with women's attraction the other way around. I'm also average or slightly taller than average height, and consider myself pretty much the perfect height.

 

Thing is - womens' height isn't a deal breaker for me. It's true that for some reason, nearly all of the girls that openly liked me have been QUITE short compared to me (probably -1 foot or more), but it wasn't the main reason I didn't like them. They were also otherwise unattractive, annoying, airheaded, desperate, etc. Not all were all of those things, but most were. However, I've also fallen hard for girls that were pretty short (-6 in or more compared to my height)

 

For height to be a deal breaker - that's shallow. Which, I guess, is also fine - but then at least admit that you're shallow.

Look, when the greater bulk of men is taller than the greater bulk of women, then its perfectly reasonable for men to want shorter women and women to want taller men.

 

No it is not shallow. People like what they like and have preferences. The word "shallow" is thrown around to much by people who get butt hurt because they get dismissed as potential partners.

 

Given where I live, my dating options are mostly not black women. And venturing out some girls may not date me because they arent into black guys. Im not gonna call them shallow though. Im gonna find a sexy girl who wants to add some cream to my coffee.

 

Its like my preference for slimmer fit chicks. If chubbier girls wanna call me shallow...then let them. Thats their issue. Would they rather me compromise what Im attracted to and force myself to date them?

C'mon. It's more than just a factor. Male height has a unique place in the realm of physical traits. There's a reason it generates so much discussion here. Nothing can make or break you like height can.

 

It feels like such an arbitrary strike against you when you're a 5'7.5" dude who is decently handsome, lean, good skin tone, immaculately clean-cut. I'm taller than 86% of women, so the whole norm of the girl being shorter than the guy should still hold true for all but a small percentage of women. I know for a fact that if I could tweak this one dimension of myself by as little as 3", it would quadruple my dating options. That's not a delusion I'm under. I've derived this conclusion from careful observation.

A womans weight can make or break the same way. =P

Edited June 24, 2013 by kaylan

[Content]

C'mon. It's more than just a .

 

It feels like such an arbitrary strike against you when you're a 5'7.5" dude who is decently handsome, lean, good skin tone, immaculately clean-cut. I'm taller than 86% of women, so the whole norm of the girl being shorter than the guy should still hold true for all but a small percentage of women. I know for a fact that if I could tweak this one dimension of myself by as little as 3", it would quadruple my dating options. That's not a delusion I'm under. I've derived this conclusion from careful observation.

 

Really youve done scientific studies? lol have you dressed in 3 inch heels and gotten more positive responses?

 

Im the same height as you and never had problems attracting women,is height a dealbreaker for some women? of course but theyres tons who dont care about height.

 

My guess is your overrating your other attributes like personality looks etc but i guess it easier for you to think your a perfect human being and your only flaw being a little under average height and thats the only reason you dont do well with women rather then looking in the mirror and seeing what else might be turning them off.

[MrCastle]

I'm 6'1". And I'm neither of those. I'm simply stating undeniable facts.

 

You're stating what you've seen based on your own personal experiences. Not "fact."

[PJKino]

Oh i dont know maybe the fact that its the one unfixable physical trait other then an ugly face and where 19 out of 20 women will dismiss you from the get go for and its no guarantee the one who doesnt have a height requeirment will be attracted to you shes just the only one who wont use height to dismiss you right away.

 

Its by far the biggest physical dealbreaker in the dating world at least fat women can lose weight we cant grow taller.

[ltjg45]

A womans weight can make or break the same way. =P

 

However, that CAN be controlled.

 

Anytime my mother comes to me with excuses as to why she is still over 280 pounds, I have the urge to just slap her. As far as I'm concerned, she can lose that weight if she has the desire to, which she doesn't.

 

However, if I were to speak to a male who is 5 ft and under, I can go some sympathy towards because that is a rough disadvantage he has to fight through and he is definitely at the mercy or how society views midgets like him.

 

I, as a 5ft 6in man, can't change my height no matter what I do.

 

Not like it matters in the end anyway. The reason why I'm still a virgin at my age has nothing to do with my height and if I was 6 ft, it still won't change my initial attraction to the "bottom of the food chain" women I see every day.

 

Instead of being a 5 ft 6 in virgin 26-year old male, I will be a 6 ft virgin 26-year old male. No difference except I have to reach a little bit farther with my hands just to masturbate and please myself.

[eastcoastgirl88]

I think it's naive and unrealistic to say that height doesn't matter to most women. There is truth in stereotypes. Maybe height doesn't matter for every single woman, but it's true that many DO care and I don't see the point in sugar-coating it.

 

It's true that my girlfriends and I have been sifting thru online dating profiles and one girl has said, "Ooo, he's cute!" and then a few pics later she says, "Oh, but he looks like he might be short..."

 

The best way a short guy can overcome his height is to a adopt the attitude of a tall person. I am pretty tall for a girl (5'8) so for me, dating a guy who is 5'10 seems "short" to me, especially when I've dated guys who are 6'4.

 

However, I've dated two guys in the 5'9-5'10 range. Both of them never mentioned their height and didn't seem one bit bothered by it. In fact, they were both kind of douchey a-holes, lol...in that way girls love, of course!

 

Because they didn't care I hardly noticed it once I got to know them and it DEFINITELY didn't bother me one bit. They were hot!!!

[kaylan]

It would be shallow, if you rejected a wonderful person in every single way other than lacking one or two inches to arbitrary limit. Same as if you rejected a wonderful woman 5 lbs over an arbitrary limit.

 

Then again you can never prove conclusively that not being tall enough or weighing 5 lbs too much was the cause of rejection, because you'd have to present the person with exactly the same option, except taller/slimmer and see if they would be rejected too. And we know it's impossible to do.

I wouldnt compare two inches to 5 pounds. Id say every inch is roughly similar to 10 pounds.

 

Why? Because say a woman is 5'7. Many would be just fine with a 5'9 guy, but might not be too keen on a guy who is right at their height and in short guy territory. And for a guy, a girl whos slim and trim at 115lbs and 5'7 will look different with 15 to 20 extra pounds rather than just 5 extra pounds.

I think it's naive and unrealistic to say that height doesn't matter to most women. There is truth in stereotypes. Maybe height doesn't matter for every single woman, but it's true that many DO care and I don't see the point in sugar-coating it.

 

It's true that my girlfriends and I have been sifting thru online dating profiles and one girl has said, "Ooo, he's cute!" and then a few pics later she says, "Oh, but he looks like he might be short..."

 

The best way a short guy can overcome his height is to a adopt the attitude of a tall person. I am pretty tall for a girl (5'8) so for me, dating a guy who is 5'10 seems "short" to me, especially when I've dated guys who are 6'4.

 

However, I've dated two guys in the 5'9-5'10 range. Both of them never mentioned their height and didn't seem one bit bothered by it. In fact, they were both kind of douchey a-holes, lol...in that way girls love, of course!

 

Because they didn't care I hardly noticed it once I got to know them and it DEFINITELY didn't bother me one bit. They were hot!!!

This.

 

But then again, its easier for average height guys (5'9 and up) to not care about their height. O wells. Im cool with my height. What I lack in height, I make up with a hot bod and some personality

[MrCastle]

I think it's naive and unrealistic to say that height doesn't matter to most shallow women. There is truth in stereotypes. Maybe height doesn't matter for every single woman, but it's true that many DO care and I don't see the point in sugar-coating it.

 

Agreed.

 

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[Phantom888]

This is a purely insecure thing that many men have, so they are always tempted to date shorter girls. I'm 5'9", and have always dated women in the 5'4" - 5'6" range, coincidentally. I would not mind dating someone taller than me, because that is kinda hot I think.

 

Yes men can grow past age of 21. I don't know if OP's boyfriend will grow 3 inches in the next few years, as that is a huge growth spurt. The man has to be confident about himself, not his appearance. He is not even short, so why is he fretting?

[Woggle]

Because height is generally a huge thing in the dating world.

[DanielStone]

I'm 6'3 and can't get a date... Tall guys can't get dates as well bro!

[Sun Devil]

I am still curious on how hard it will be for a 5 foot tall guy. I even had another thread about knowing any short men who are successful with women. Some people did mention guys under 5 foot 4 who were

[Southern Cal Dude]

This is a purely insecure thing that many men have, so they are always tempted to date shorter girls. I'm 5'9", and have always dated women in the 5'4" - 5'6" range, coincidentally. I would not mind dating someone taller than me, because that is kinda hot I think.

 

Yes men can grow past age of 21. I don't know if OP's boyfriend will grow 3 inches in the next few years, as that is a huge growth spurt. The man has to be confident about himself, not his appearance. He is not even short, so why is he fretting?

 

 

I grew 6 more inches after I turned 16, so you never know.

[thefooloftheyear]

I dont know if the ladies are aware of this...

 

Being in athletics most of my life and being in locker rooms I can honestly say that height has nothing to do with the size of the package.

 

Ive seen some pretty tall guys hung like doorbells.

 

TFY