Consolidated Discussion - A man's/woman's height in the search for relationships

[nescafe1982]

I love how it seems EVERY woman on this forum seems to have no issues with a guys height....almost acting as if they struggle to find guys that accept them.

 

I've been on dating sites and all I've found is the total opposite....the women have it written in black and white...in their profile

 

DO NOT EMAIL ME IF YOU ARE UNDER 6ft

 

I LIKE TO WEAR HEELS SO YOU MUST BE OVER 6ft

 

I DONT CARE THAT I'M ONLY 5' 2 I LIKE VERY TALL GUYS

 

Thats only a few of the many, many statements I've seen by women

 

.

 

See? This, this right here is the kind of male insecurity I'm talking about. Why did you quote me to make this rant? I clearly don't struggle to find guys that accept me (um, hello. 5'10' with a toned butt, lol)... But a lot of men are intimidated by tall woman. Them's true facts (heck, you attacked me, didn't you?)

[nescafe1982]

 

(just be sure you can actually walk in them)

 

Oh dear god yes. I'm in a college town, and every Fall there's a new bevy of coeds who teeter down the streets on the weekends, looking like a little boy playing dress-up with mom's pumps.

 

Not sexy. Not sexy at all.

[Mascara]

I feel many men are stupid

 

I have nothing more to teach you grasshopper.

[sillyanswer]

Oh dear god yes. I'm in a college town, and every Fall there's a new bevy of coeds who teeter down the streets on the weekends, looking like a little boy playing dress-up with mom's pumps.

 

Not sexy. Not sexy at all.

 

I've been on dates where the women could barely walk from the bar to the restaurant. Happy to offer my arm, but it wasn't the sexiest of looks!

[atomicdog]

Not just that, how are you going to compare to the same, but scaled up version?

 

Height isn't a problem to short men, it is a problem to women.

 

My idealistic self thinks it will be a combination of winning factors - not just one - that will score you women.

 

For example if you're 5'5 but are well dressed and know how to be funny and share some interest with the woman you're targeting, it'll be hard for her to find that exact combination in most other men.

 

I don't know if the above is actually true, just a hypothesis.

 

Another point of evidence - there's this executive at the company where I work who's shorter than me (and not particularly handsome), but seems to have no problem with women.

 

He's married, and when we went out drinking a week ago (he invited me because I'm one of his most productive employees) he admitted that he has a mistress in another state.

 

He talked about a bunch of exciting cool things he did on some of his holiday trips, and he seems very smart and sophisticated.

 

I think the above things are more important to the women who like him than his height.

[mesmerized]

Been a while since I had a thread here so it's time for one. How much important is a woman's height in dating?? I know most people say it doesn't matter but I've had a few men, yes MEN mention my height (average) as a disadvantage in dating, as something that reduces my overall attractiveness mainly because it means I look less model like not being tall. One of my friends who is a tall dude always mentions a girl's height first when he wants to talk about her degree of hotness. Now it doesn't bother me too much, nothing I can do to change my height really. But I wonder how common this kind of thinking is when it comes to women.

[veggirl]

I don't think height is ever a dealbreaker really for guys, like it can be for women. Lots of guys like petite girls so they feel bigger I guess but plenty like tall girls too...I'm 5'8 and 1/2 (lol) and I've never been told I'm too tall for a guy or anything. I have def been told I'm the tallest girl a lot of guys have dated. I think with height, a guy is gonna like a tall slim girl but if she is tall and broad she will struggle more. Girls around average (5'4?) I can't imagine a guy even commenting on that.....I think it's weird if you are average height that a guy has told you that was a negative!

[PlumPrincess]

It doesn't matter. Short women are cute, tall women are impressive. Being a woman is great.

[mesmerized]

I don't think height is ever a dealbreaker really for guys, like it can be for women. Lots of guys like petite girls so they feel bigger I guess but plenty like tall girls too...I'm 5'8 and 1/2 (lol) and I've never been told I'm too tall for a guy or anything. I have def been told I'm the tallest girl a lot of guys have dated. I think with height, a guy is gonna like a tall slim girl but if she is tall and broad she will struggle more. Girls around average (5'4?) I can't imagine a guy even commenting on that.....I think it's weird if you are average height that a guy has told you that was a negative!

 

I think it's weird too. I think people I meet/hang out with are just extremely vain honestly.

[nescafe1982]

I don't think height is ever a dealbreaker really for guys, like it can be for women.

 

I can vouch that some men do have trouble with tall women. I'm 5'10" and had some men who felt very uncomfortable with my height, esp. with my choice in footwear. But it's not common for a man to have a problem with a woman's height... and if he does it's a pretty clear indicator that he's not date-worthy, imho.

 

fwiw, I read that 5'7" is "average" for American women. 5'4" would be bordering on petite!

[PJKino]

I think people I meet/hang out with are just extremely vain honestly.

 

Says a women who wont date short guys

[tbf]

As a below average height woman at 5'2.5" (yes, the 1/2" matters so shut up ), I can vouch that my height hasn't been a disadvantage in the dating arena.

[Star Gazer]

I'm 5'3.75" (like tbf, that little extra counts!), and have not had my height be an issue either.

 

However, very recently when meeting someone for a first meet/date, the guy immediate said, "You're taller than I was expecting!" Well duh, girls my height typically don't go out in flats!

 

Guys should always add 2-5" as a possibility to her height, depending on footwear.

[mortensorchid]

I'm 5'10", a large percent of men (of all ages) are shorter than me. I for one don't have a problem with my height, but I think a lot of men out there do secretly. Insecurity? I think. It's just how we were made, you have no control over it.

 

But here's a piece of trivia for you, this is a sort of but not really politically incorrect thing to say nowadays. I had a great aunt since passed away who years ago worked as a nurse in a hospital nursery. They used to literally write mismatch on the hospital chart if they had a situation with a tall man and a short woman, or vice versa. I think we still carry over this even though it's considered old fashioned thinking nowadays.

[Star Gazer]

guys hardly care about height

 

:lmao:

[Pyro]

:lmao:

 

Star don't feed.

[Imported]

I am not in to tall women. At all. I just feel no attraction. They can be very good looking and I can and will agree that they are good looking, but I just feel no attraction. I am 5'11" and I think around 5'8" for a women is about as tall as I'd normally accept. Call it what you will, but I actually have no problem with my own height. It is my height, it is not going to change and there are plenty of women shorter, so there is no problems for me. I have gone out with women over 5'8", but they made it very apparent they just wanted to have a good time and I was up for that. Actually dating them....no. I have never approached a girl taller than me or very close to my own height.

 

Spinners, really short women.....are fun. But honestly, I like women @ 5'6". I don't really see myself dating very short women, just looks kinda odd. They are always fun though and so energized! It is not out of the realm of possibilities, but I prefer when a girl puts on her come **** me shoes, she is just at my height or slightly shorter.

[soccerrprp]

fwiw, I read that 5'7" is "average" for American women. 5'4" would be bordering on petite!

 

No way! Average height of women in the USA is 5'4-5'5. There are no women in the world, on average, that are 5'7 (collectively).

[mesmerized]

Says a women who wont date short guys

 

Duh, pot meets kettle

[soccerrprp]

Weird, I just had a conversation about this with my current gf. She's 5'8 and two inches taller than me.

 

She hesitated to contact me b/c she didn't think that I would want to date a taller woman. I told her, personally, I really don't care, that it's the women who normally have the problem with the height difference.

 

I don't actively and normally go after women beyond 5'8. It's psychological, I think, not to go beyond 5'8. And no shorter than 5'0.

[tbf]

it never is for females. it is for males because females make it into an issue. even males for the 'ideal' 6 foot size ocasionally get tossed aside for being the wrong height.

Just proof positive that it's rarely about one feature or trait, why some are rejected or accepted. There are so many variables since there are so many individuals with their subjective preferences.

 

My perception is that the minute you hold onto the belief that men are "R" and women are "M", you've essentially effed yourself out of the dating pool.

[nescafe1982]

where's the proof of what men secretly think? there isn't any because females don't know what men secretly think. they are wrong more than they are right.

 

I know you didn't quote me, but I can give a few pieces of evidence. Each of the following happened to me on dates with men who ranged from 5'7" to 6'2". The only thing that ties them together is that they were uncomfortable with my height:

 

- The one who came to pick me up, but then refused to leave my apartment until I changed out of my stilettos.

 

- The one who accused me of lying on my OLD profile because I was clearly taller than 5'10" and "if I knew that I wouldn't have come tonight."

 

- The one who said "tall is sexy" on our first date but didn't want to dance with me on our second date because it would "look awkward." (That guy actually did lie about his height on his OLD profile, btw).

 

etc. etc

 

Now this is a small minority of men out there... not anywhere near the norm. Most dudes think my height is (if anything) something good. But there is a clearly defined preference for shorter women.

 

Of course, women also perpetuate this kind of culture too. If I had a dollar for every time a woman has told me I was "brave" for wearing heels or that "I could never do that if I was your height," I'd have a lot of dollars.

 

On the other hand, I have found that being tall has helped me in the professional world. I look commanding in a suit and heels.

[TouchedByViolet]

Guys are attracted to women of all heights, unlike how women generally prefer taller men.

 

When I describe an attractive girl to my friends I almost always mention height, and ethnicity just to help paint the picture. There is no bad height for women.

[MrCastle]

fwiw, I read that 5'7" is "average" for American women. 5'4" would be bordering on petite!

 

That is absolutely wrong. There's almost no way 5'7 is average for a woman.

 

Anyway, I don't care about height at all. I don't care if I have to look down at her or look up. Not really something I've ever been concerned about. Both have their perks.

 

Shorter girls can be spinners and are easier to toss around, taller women have the amazon thing going for them. I like both experiences.

[MrTurk]

I'm 5'10", a large percent of men (of all ages) are shorter than me. I for one don't have a problem with my height, but I think a lot of men out there do secretly. Insecurity? I think. It's just how we were made, you have no control over it.

 

I dont believe the insecurity is born from within the guy.....its usually experienced and proven by the actions of women around him.

 

I have no problem with the womans height myself....and I have experienced nicer, and more polite women that tend to be very near my height (5' 8) vs women that are much shorter. They seem to be more picky and more superficial. Not blanketing all....just my personal experience.