Consolidated Discussion - A man's/woman's height in the search for relationships

[somedude81]

As a man who is 5'7 i am ashamed that i have finally turned down a date with a woman who was too short. She is only 4'9-4'10.

Not exactly sure how tall she is but she is the same height as my mates wife.

He loves how little his wife is but i never saw the appeal.

She was waiting for me to ask her out, i knew this from talking to to my mate and his wife but after seeing a photo of the two women together, i haven't bothered asking her out.

I knew she was short when i 1st met her but i didnt realise how short.

She is attractive and " nice and genuine " to use his words.

What makes it worse is that i told my mate i would ask her out, he probably told his wife, she has told the girl i was going to ask out and she is still waiting for me to ask.

And she is the cousin of my mates wife too.

Why do i continue to open these can of worms??

Eh, some guys just aren't really into tiny women. But don't worry, many guys are.

 

One thing I do believe is that a shorter than average guy should not have kids with a shorter than average woman. The odds are having really short kids are just too great.

 

I'd feel extremely guilty if I had kids with a really short woman and had a son who stopped growing at below 5'8. Though if the mother was average height and kid was still under 5'8, I'd at least know that I tried to make a difference.

[Bruce Leigh]

One thing I do believe is that a shorter than average guy should not have kids with a shorter than average woman. The odds are having really short kids are just too great.

 

I'd feel extremely guilty if I had kids with a really short woman and had a son who stopped growing at below 5'8. Though if the mother was average height and kid was still under 5'8, I'd at least know that I tried to make a difference.

 

Wouldn't have to worry about the height if the child was a girl though

[somedude81]

Wouldn't have to worry about the height if the child was a girl though

True.

 

But there is no way to guarantee that you will only have girls. If you even want just to have girls.

[R3d]

True.

 

But there is no way to guarantee that you will only have girls. If you even want just to have girls.

If it's a boy, get an abortion.

 

(I'm pro-choice, so yeah...)

[Candy_Pants]

Everyone is "shallow", just depends to what degree.

 

I'm short (5'1") and I prefer tall men (>6'). Obviously the men dated (regardless of their respective heights) either A) liked short women, or B) had no preference.

[Bruce Leigh]

True.

 

But there is no way to guarantee that you will only have girls. If you even want just to have girls.

 

Ha ha, my mate in work has 4 girls, they tried and tried to have a boy but he has had the snip now, after their last attempt

[Imported]

Articles like this make me so glad I don't have this problem.

 

See, I'm only 5'6" but I'm not a short man. Height is a matter of genetics but short is a matter of attitude.

 

 

I'm 5'11". Everytime I saw a girl I considered too tall, I never thought I should be taller. I just thought that girl probably wishes she was shorter.

 

I am sure this will not go over well with many people, but it's like this for me. I see a girl that is out of shape because of weight and I seriously do not feel any attraction towards her. I can look at her and realize that if she were to drop the weight, she would be a "stunner" for physical attraction. But until that happens...I have zero interest on any romantic levels towards her.

 

Similar for women that are too tall. I do in fact come across women that are pretty, nice body, face and obviously a nice person and they make it clear they are interested in me......but they are too tall. If they are open to just having fun...maybe, but I can't see myself dating them and I don't. I don't care how otherwise attractive they are. What I see is they are too tall and there are plenty of women out there that are as attractive in all areas as well and are not too tall.

 

I have had two women tell me I was too short. Both were 5'4" or shorter. I have had more experience with women I consider too tall (too close to my height or even taller than me) that were attracted and had no problem with my height.

 

I think for a girl that is taller than average, it is very difficult as many men will be shorter than them and short women snap them right up, which limits the taller women even more. So taller women probably are more likely to learn to accept that some men will be shorter than them.

[AdrianCrawley]

...

 

- I'm 165cm and 21 years old.

 

I'm over 10 cm taller than you and still can't meet women. I mean, I can, but they're not attracted to me, so they don't care about getting to know me. BUT, I have a former colleague who is 163 cm tall and he's gotten married. Also, he is a little bit younger than me. See what I mean ? If it happens it happens, if it doesn't, it doesn't.

 

As a rule, yes, women don't like short men, they don't even like average height men. They're just ... unattractive.

[somedude81]

Here's something that's been bugging me for a while.

 

On several occasions there's been a girl that I'm interested in and when I talk to her I don't seem to get a very good reaction. Then later on I see her smiling and laughing with another guy, I wonder what he has that I don't. I do a size comparison, knowing how tall she is compared to me, I see that he's several inches taller than I am. So then I think, "Yup, she's shallow and only likes tall guys."

 

Though recently it's been starting to hit me, that guy wasn't tall, he's average height. I'm just short

 

My height isn't an issue at all to me, when I have a woman interested in me. But when women don't respond well to me, my height is the first thing I blame. "If only I were taller, she would like me."

 

I wish I could remove those thoughts. But it's so hard when I struggle with women.

[AdrianCrawley]

Then remove women from your life. For me, they're just a topic of discussion.

[R3d]

Here's something that's been bugging me for a while.

 

On several occasions there's been a girl that I'm interested in and when I talk to her I don't seem to get a very good reaction. Then later on I see her smiling and laughing with another guy, I wonder what he has that I don't. I do a size comparison, knowing how tall she is compared to me, I see that he's several inches taller than I am. So then I think, "Yup, she's shallow and only likes tall guys."

 

Though recently it's been starting to hit me, that guy wasn't tall, he's average height. I'm just short

 

My height isn't an issue at all to me, when I have a woman interested in me. But when women don't respond well to me, my height is the first thing I blame. "If only I were taller, she would like me."

 

I wish I could remove those thoughts. But it's so hard when I struggle with women.

 

Dude that happens to me so much nd I know exactly what you're talking about. I font get it either and often end up blaming my height in those cases.

[Bruce Leigh]

Then remove women from your life. For me, they're just a topic of discussion.

 

I never really knew about height bias with some women until i wondered about online dating. A quick google certainly convinced me not to bother with OLD being 5'7.

Google brought me here and i genuinely had no idea that it was such a touchy subject.

But then i have had a take it or leave attitude to women over the years.

A woman liked me, great, she doesn't, so what. But sometimes it has been "a woman likes me, so what"

I just don't understand myself at times.

[hasaquestion]

My younger brother is 5'7" and he does well for himself. Granted, he's hilarious and has an impeccable sense of style.

 

Women generally prefer men who are taller than them, just like men generally prefer women who are thinner than them.

 

If you can't focus constructively on the things you do control, and have a healthy relationship with the things you don't, life will suck. That's just life in general.

 

Anyway,I'd say a girl's shallow for turning me down for being too short. But then what does that make me for turning down a girl who's too thick? Preferences are just that. Preferences.

[somedude81]

My younger brother is 5'7" and he does well for himself. Granted, he's hilarious and has an impeccable sense of style.

 

Women generally prefer men who are taller than them, just like men generally prefer women who are thinner than them.

 

If you can't focus constructively on the things you do control, and have a healthy relationship with the things you don't, life will suck. That's just life in general.

 

Anyway,I'd say a girl's shallow for turning me down for being too short. But then what does that make me for turning down a girl who's too thick? Preferences are just that. Preferences.

A woman who is too thick is that way because of something she did. She can also lose the weight if she really wants to.

 

A guy who is too short had no choice in the matter. There is also nothing he can do excluding surgery to get taller.

 

If I could work out, and grow six inches, I would have done it years ago.

[hasaquestion]

A woman who is too thick is that way because of something she did. She can also lose the weight if she really wants to.

 

A guy who is too short had no choice in the matter. There is also nothing he can do excluding surgery to get taller.

 

If I could work out, and grow six inches, I would have done it years ago.

 

Not necessarily. People can change their bodies to a certain degree but its not a reasonable thing to expect in many cases. Some people are just endomorphs.

[Anela]

A woman who is too thick is that way because of something she did. She can also lose the weight if she really wants to.

 

A guy who is too short had no choice in the matter. There is also nothing he can do excluding surgery to get taller.

 

If I could work out, and grow six inches, I would have done it years ago.

 

It isn't that easy to lose weight, so no, it isn't always her fault. And a woman who is anything from slightly overweight, to obese, has nothing to apologize for. She gets to like herself - even love herself - and expect to be treated like a human being by others, because she happens to be one.

[hasaquestion]

It isn't that easy to lose weight, so no, it isn't always her fault. And a woman who is anything from slightly overweight, to obese, has nothing to apologize for. She gets to like herself - even love herself - and expect to be treated like a human being by others, because she happens to be one.

 

Yeah, just like if you're short. You're best off coming to peace with the way you are, expecting/demanding someone who appreciates you for that, and keeping your dignity.

 

I'm not saying don't work out/eat clean/make some reasonable effort to be in good shape. But keep it in perspective.

[Bruce Leigh]

It isn't that easy to lose weight, so no, it isn't always her fault. And a woman who is anything from slightly overweight, to obese, has nothing to apologize for. She gets to like herself - even love herself - and expect to be treated like a human being by others, because she happens to be one.

 

Some people do have a genetic disadvantage, some may have a serious injury which hinders them but most people do not burn off what they eat. Eating more, doing less exercise will give you the same outcome. Added weight.

Some people really do refuse to help themselves though. Its their choice to accept it and be happy or do something about it if they are not happy.

With most things in life, you get out what you put in. Some get it easier than others but hey, that's life.

[hasaquestion]

Some people do have a genetic disadvantage, some may have a serious injury which hinders them but most people do not burn off what they eat. Eating more, doing less exercise will give you the same outcome. Added weight.

Some people really do refuse to help themselves though. Its their choice to accept it and be happy or do something about it if they are not happy.

With most things in life, you get out what you put in. Some get it easier than others but hey, that's life.

 

Yeah many people can manage weight loss, and get closer to their healthy optimal. But at the end of the day some people are just endomorphs. Just like some guys are short.

 

I know I'm not the only male who would not pursue certain women on the basis of body type - no matter how much they exercised. That's life. They're better off without me. Why can't women have similar preferences?

[somedude81]

Only a very small percentage of women are overweight because they can't control it.

 

No, losing weight isn't easy, but it is possible for the vast majority of people. It takes hard work and dedication.

 

Getting taller is impossible. There is absolutely nothing I can do whatsoever to get taller.

[Anela]

Improving your attitude is possible. Your expiration date wasn't the day you didn't grow past whatever you are now. If it's so easy to change something, change your attitude - go on.

[hasaquestion]

Only a very small percentage of women are overweight because they can't control it.

 

No, losing weight isn't easy, but it is possible for the vast majority of people. It takes hard work and dedication.

 

Getting taller is impossible. There is absolutely nothing I can do whatsoever to get taller.

 

You're confusing "overweight" with just looking different.

 

Not everyone has a skinny body type. Some women just have square shoulders, shapeless figures, wide hips, thick arms and ankles.... People come in different body types. Just as impossible to change as your height.

[somedude81]

You're confusing "overweight" with just looking different.

 

Not everyone has a skinny body type. Some women just have square shoulders, shapeless figures, wide hips, thick arms and ankles.... People come in different body types. Just as impossible to change as your height.

No, I'm talking about girls that are 5'2 and weigh 160 lbs or more, while I'm 5'6, 155 and hardly rail thin. Women that have puffy faces and rolls on their bodies where there shouldn't be.

 

I have no problem with a girl that's a little overweight and actually kind of prefer it as long as she has large breasts. But a woman that's shorter than me and weighs more than I do is too much.

[Bruce Leigh]

I'm 5'7, turn 39 this year and i still get hit on by women. Probably more so now than when i was in my 20's.

But i was more negative in my 20's. Took me a while to realise that.

Older and wiser than i have ever been.

Edited May 10, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[R3d]

i still get hit on by women

???

 

Women hit on men? Since when did this start happening unless you are a total stud?

 

This is not the first time I have heard this on Loveshack. I have heard of other guys saying that they are getting hit on by girls. How does that happen? I thought girls almost never make the first move, unless you win the genetic lottery.