Consolidated Discussion - A man's/woman's height in the search for relationships

[thefooloftheyear]

Another thing,

 

Who said height is the only thing that matters? Of course it cant be the only thing someone has. And quite funny that you go the typical short guy route and make that comment. The point being is that all things being equal, most women would take the 6'2 guy over the 5'9 guy.

 

Does that bother me? No...because people arent identical and do not ever end up in "all things being equal" situations with someone else. And im sure a lot of guys would change physical properties of their mates if everything else about her stayed the same.

 

Dont speak for me, Skippy..

 

Ive never inmy entire life EVER had any issue with my height..I see it as a plus..Its never been an impediment to anything in my life...Save that comment for the other guys on here that think life kicked them in the nuts because they arent 6' tall.. Im not one of them,

 

TFY

[thefooloftheyear]

Ok... your point?

 

Im all for that, but it doesnt change the fact that men still run the show and will for a long time. And it doesnt change the fact that those powerful gals still enjoy men who look powerful (tall and sexy) and are powerful (status)

 

It is what it is.

And what hes arguing is patently false. There is more than enough research of people of the past and present (across many different countries) to show that women are sexually drawn to men taller than themselves.

 

Id love to see this guy arguing the same thing the next time a female weight thread comes up. Doubt I will see him their since he has no personal stake in that matter.

 

 

What is YOUR height and weight?

[kaylan]

And Yes,

 

some of what we find attractive is influenced by society, but much of it is genetic programming as well. I dont see how someone could argue against that. Actual, I could see why someone would do that if they didnt win the genetic lottery.

 

Saying attraction is all based on society is no different than when people try to say being gay isnt a choice. There are certain things naturally within all of us that make certain traits attractive and unattractive.

What is YOUR height and weight?

5'9, 180 lbs, 32 waist, and a pretty nice bod if I do so myself xD

[thefooloftheyear]

And Yes,

 

some of what we find attractive is influenced by society, but much of it is genetic programming as well. I dont see how someone could argue against that. Actual, I could see why someone would do that if they didnt win the genetic lottery.

 

Saying attraction is all based on society is no different than when people try to say being gay isnt a choice. There are certain things naturally within all of us that make certain traits attractive and unattractive.

5'9, 180 lbs, 32 waist, and a pretty nice bod if I do so myself xD

 

Im sorry, but everything you are saying is narrow minded nonsense..

 

Ive seen too much to the contrary to make the statements you make. Heck, come to think of it, there is a downright tiny guy that works at the gym I attend..This guy is all of 5' tall and might weigh 130..His girlfriend is a beauty..5'7" very pretty...

 

The difference here is this guy has a great personality..hes always smiling and laughing..You think he sits at home and cries in his beer because he is short? Nope..

 

You either have game or you dont...Its as plain and simple as that...And it applies as much to dating as it does to everyday life....And just being tall wont give you game, sorry to say..

 

TFY

Edited June 24, 2013 by thefooloftheyear

[kaylan]

Im sorry, but everything you are saying is narrow minded nonsense..

 

Ive seen too much to the contrary to make the statements you make. Heck, come to think of it, there is a downright tiny guy that works at the gym I attend..This guy is all of 5' tall and might weigh 130..His girlfriend is a beauty..5'7" very pretty...

 

The difference here is this guy has a great personality..hes always smiling and laughing..You think he sits at home and cries in his beer because he is short? Nope..

 

You either have game or you dont...Its as plain and simple as that...And it applies as much to dating as it does to everyday life.

 

TFY

Again, you keep talking about exceptions to the rule when I never said all men or all women only date shorter or taller mates. Im saying that most men and women are drawn to certain traits. This is fact.

 

And I just said that "all things being equal" situations dont exist in real life. So the tiny guys gf wouldnt have her bf if she went for a taller guy...because the taller guy would be a completely different person.

 

However, I would be rather sure that if she could have the same bf, she would take him at a taller height.

 

Using an example of a super short guy with a taller gf doesnt outweigh all the numerous examples of men being taller than their girlfriends. I never said womens desire for taller men was absolute, I said that most women want a taller guy though.

Edited June 24, 2013 by kaylan

[skydiveaddict]

I don't get this. I love my bf for who he is, not his height.

 

Until you meet a taller man that you are attracted to. Then your current boyfriend will be history. He knows this. That's why he worries about it.

[MrCastle]

Again, you keep talking about exceptions to the rule when I never said all men or all women only date shorter or taller mates. Im saying that most men and women are drawn to certain traits. This is fact.

 

And I just said that "all things being equal" situations dont exist in real life. So the tiny guys gf wouldnt have her bf if she went for a taller guy...because the taller guy would be a completely different person.

 

However, I would be rather sure that if she could have the same bf, she would take him at a taller height.

 

That's where the biological argument falls apart though.

 

If it was biological (we can't fight biology) she would always pick the taller guy no matter how much game the shorter man had, or how much he had to offer her, etc.

 

By picking who she did, she is making a choice to date the shorter man and rejecting the taller ones.

 

The "all things equal" thing, as you said, doesn't hold up because things are never equal. But of course, if you could have everything you want in a person plus more, every single human being would take it.

 

Who would you rather have, Mila Kunis, or Mila Kunis with bigger boobs and a larger butt? Of course you'd pick the latter.

 

But when the option is Mila Kunis (good personality, no curves) or a thick girl who's an air head and has a bad personality, you're gonna go with Mila.

 

Of course if the woman could have the man she's dating or the exact same man 8 inches taller, she'd go for the latter. But that guy isn't an option. It's the short guy with all the personal qualities she wants, versus taller men who lack those personal qualities.

 

If it was all biology, we would all be dating big breasted, big assed women, and tall men, no matter their personality, facial appearance, income, status, etc.

 

We're not. We're choosing mates based on other factors.

[Bumbee]

Until you meet a taller man that you are attracted to. Then your current boyfriend will be history. He knows this. That's why he worries about it.

I've met him since 5th grade. We were best friend first and I towered him 5-6 inches back then. I didn't mind then and still don't.

 

And no I wouldn't change my bf for a 6+ guy. If he doesn't want to look shorter, I'll just keep wearing tennis shoes or sandals.

Edited June 24, 2013 by Bumbee

[skydiveaddict]

 

And no I wouldn't change my bf for a 6+ guy.

 

Yes you will. It's human nature. There is nothing you can do about it. It's built into the female instinct. The protector/ provider/ defender instinct. That's why your boyfriend worries about it, because he knows this.

[thefooloftheyear]

Again, you keep talking about exceptions to the rule when I never said all men or all women only date shorter or taller mates. Im saying that most men and women are drawn to certain traits. This is fact.

 

And I just said that "all things being equal" situations dont exist in real life. So the tiny guys gf wouldnt have her bf if she went for a taller guy...because the taller guy would be a completely different person.

 

However, I would be rather sure that if she could have the same bf, she would take him at a taller height.

 

Using an example of a super short guy with a taller gf doesnt outweigh all the numerous examples of men being taller than their girlfriends. I never said womens desire for taller men was absolute, I said that most women want a taller guy though.

 

You just dont get it, and quite frankly you never will...

 

Lets stay on the topic of height..Short guys are just generally insecure..So are fat women....But it has absolutely NOTHING to do with whether or not they can achieve success in life/career/ relationships...Short guys(and fat women) need not abide by societies "so called" ideals, as long as they exude confidence and are settled with their physical attributes.

 

What you are basically saying is that "society" says that if you are short(or fat) you are basically fcked and only rare exceptions exist...Well, think about it...There is nothing "magical" about these so called exceptions..All it proves is that ANYONE can be the exception...There is no membership card to this club..You have confidence and game and you are in...Simple as that..

 

Im sure you are going to have the last word, so have at it.Im tired of making too much sense...

 

TFY

[kaylan]

Yes you will. It's human nature. There is nothing you can do about it. It's built into the female instinct. The protector/ provider/ defender instinct. That's why your boyfriend worries about it, because he knows this.

I have to disagree with you. While men and women may like certain physical traits in a mate, a persons personality can override a lot of things.

 

Sure I prefer a girl shorter than me, but I dated the girl who was 6 ft tall because we clicked so well at the time.

[thefooloftheyear]

Yes you will. It's human nature. There is nothing you can do about it. It's built into the female instinct. The protector/ provider/ defender instinct. That's why your boyfriend worries about it, because he knows this.

 

I wonder why the "female instinct" of the 5'11" girl I dated in college(im 5'7") didnt kick in ...No she didnt leave me for a taller guy I left her because she was too needy...

 

TFY

[thatone]

Analogy fail.

 

Overweight women can lose weight. Short men are just..short.

 

It's a fact. I don't get why you are refusing to acknowledge it. I have spent my share of time with the opposite sex at 36 years old. And I can show you a plethora of examples where a complete moron who was 6'3" or taller had more success with women over guys who had that 6'3" guy trumped in every way, all else being equal. You can walk into any bar and watch this take place on a daily basis.

 

And I'm not a bitter short guy, I'm 6' even. But I see it happen all the time.

[skydiveaddict]

I have to disagree with you. While men and women may like certain physical traits in a mate, a persons personality can override a lot of things.

 

Not true. Women are attracted to tall, confident, successful men. And they will abandon their current mate if they find a man who has these traits. To deny this is to deny reality. That's how are women are built.

[kaylan]

You just dont get it, and quite frankly you never will...

Youre the one who seems incapable of understanding exactly what I am getting at. So let me try again.

Lets stay on the topic of height..Short guys are just generally insecure..So are fat women....But it has absolutely NOTHING to do with whether or not they can achieve success in life/career/ relationships.

Oh jeez, I never said short men or fat women couldnt be successful in life. Ive been saying that people show a positive bias towards tall and attractive people, and because of this we see more tall people in positions of power and success when compared to their actual number in the population.

 

Let me repeat that. Tall and attractive people are overrepresented in positions of wealth and power when compared to their actual percentage in the general population. Why is this? Because people treat them differently, and studies back this up.

 

It doesnt mean that shorter or less attractive people have no shot at being rich or powerful though. I never said they couldnt. Learn to read what I am saying instead of becoming so reactionary towards a few tidbits you dislike. Take in the entire message.

 

Short guys(and fat women) need not abide by societies "so called" ideals, as long as they exude confidence and are settled with their physical attributes.

I agree. I never said they shouldnt accept themselves and not be confident. I am just saying certain types of people have it easier. Im 5'9 myself and Im sure my life would be a bit different if I was 6'2 or better looking. Doesnt mean I cant still be a success with how I am though.

 

What you are basically saying is that "society" says that if you are short(or fat) you are basically fcked and only rare exceptions exist...Well, think about it...There is nothing "magical" about these so called exceptions..All it proves is that ANYONE can be the exception...There is no membership card to this club..You have confidence and game and you are in...Simple as that..

Please quote me where I said someone is screwed if they are fat and short. I NEVER said that. I said that positive bias is shown towards tall and attractive people. While this could also mean that negative bias is sometimes shown to shorter and fatter people (which does happen), it doesnt mean that anyones life is completely out of their hands.

 

I NEVER SAID THAT. So stop making assumptions and putting words in my mouth. Jeez. Its like if I said most super models are white, and that most talent scouts recruit white women, youd run in and argue that I said non-white models are screwed and could never have careers. Thats the logic you are using. Learn to read what Im saying. Positive bias for one group, does not mean other groups can never succeed.

Im sure you are going to have the last word, so have at it.Im tired of making too much sense...

 

TFY

Lol, you make little sense....especially because you dont have enough sense to comprehend the exact points I have been making.

[Bumbee]

Yes you will. It's human nature. There is nothing you can do about it. It's built into the female instinct. The protector/ provider/ defender instinct. That's why your boyfriend worries about it, because he knows this.

That's such a negative point of view. If you love someone, you do.

Yes, love can even block this so called ''human nature'' you're referring to. If what you're saying were true then I'm sure you know there have always been exceptions to any rule.

I'm telling you now, I can't think of any other guy besides my loving bf. I'll even stood up for him if some other guy started attacking him and vice-versa. I know he might probably feel embarrassed if I jump in but he shouldn't.

[kaylan]

Not true. Women are attracted to tall, confident, successful men. And they will abandon their current mate if they find a man who has these traits. To deny this is to deny reality. That's how are women are built.

Some people are loyal bro, and love their mates. Thats a reality.

[Bumbee]

I have to disagree with you. While men and women may like certain physical traits in a mate, a persons personality can override a lot of things.

That poster doesn't get that.

[kaylan]

I wonder why the "female instinct" of the 5'11" girl I dated in college(im 5'7") didnt kick in ...No she didnt leave me for a taller guy I left her because she was too needy...

 

TFY

So your one experience with that girl discounts the countless experiences of other women who have always dated guys taller than them? Your singular experience trumps studies that show men prefer shorter women and that women prefer taller men?

[skydiveaddict]

That's such a negative point of view. If you love someone, you do.

 

Until you find someone better.

 

Yes, love can even block this so called ''human nature'' you're referring to.

No you can't. It's part of who you are. It is unavoidable.

[skydiveaddict]

Some people are loyal bro, and love their mates. Thats a reality.

 

True enough, until they find a more desirable mate.

[Feelin Frisky]

I never had a choice in the matter. I was over 6' at 13 years of age and put on another 3 inches. The world is made for shorter men though. All the leaning to do things on counter tops and sinks and so forth, causes lower back pain. And hitting your head on stuff is infuriating.

[Ed the 3rd]

Its very easy for men to feel insecure about their height. Its such a huge deal breaker now days but its something men can't change so we feel inadequate. I'm 5'11 so I'm on the borderline but I still have girls tower over me. Even at work a great deal of people just tower straight over me.

 

I can't help but feel a little bitter when I see some massive guy with a smoking hot but tall as hell female. Like I said earlier we can lose weight, gain muscle, get a new style and up our games in quite a few ways but when there's a deal breaker that we can do nothing about it gets to us because not matter how short a guy is he was to feel dominant.

[pcplod]

I don't get this. I love my bf for who he is, not his height. To make him feel better, I've stopped wearing median to high heels.

 

But we've just finished our sophomore year in high school so that means there is enough time for him. As of now our height is 5'10 (me) and 5'8 3/4 (him).

 

He has wondered what would be his final height and if he'll reach the 6ft mark. He has said ''Bumbee, you're so tall, even after all these years I still can't past you''.

 

I'm wondering if there is a way get him to stop focusing on this. Is this really what most guys desire, to tower us?? I don't see any difference. It would still be him but only taller and maybe more weight added. But still him.

 

I would deflect him by pointing out that you are so much more concerned for him regarding his inadequate grammar comprehension, rather than his stature. Both may have some impact on his future employability, but there is only one of the issues he can do much about.

[thefooloftheyear]

Analogy fail.

 

Overweight women can lose weight. Short men are just..short.

 

It's a fact. I don't get why you are refusing to acknowledge it. I have spent my share of time with the opposite sex at 36 years old. And I can show you a plethora of examples where a complete moron who was 6'3" or taller had more success with women over guys who had that 6'3" guy trumped in every way, all else being equal. You can walk into any bar and watch this take place on a daily basis.

 

And I'm not a bitter short guy, I'm 6' even. But I see it happen all the time.

 

It wasnt an analogy....Just an observation of two seperate physical conditions..

 

So the comings and goings at the typical bar is what dictates what society as a whole is doing?...Er....OK,there..

 

And im short ,....and 100% content about it.

 

TFY