Consolidated Discussion - A man's/woman's height in the search for relationships

[todreaminblue]

You're not gonna tell us what you're doing in your dance classes?? I thought it was dancing but I guess I'm wrong..?

 

 

lol that tickled me....no do people actually take dance classes to learn how to dance.....no wonder they didnt appreciate me bringing snacks and wanting to read yeates in motion i though that i fit in there..it was jazz funk though...bummer.....dance class dance got it.....ill try zumba and poetry next time...do i take ballet shoes though..deb

[organizedchaos]

Yes, I've seen many posts where some women try to pretend that women don't care about looks at all, and the only thing that matters is character or the mans personality traits. Of course that's a total lie.

 

 

 

Yes and no.

 

I believe that being short is a reason why I haven't dated more.

 

I also believe that if I was at least 5'10, I would have dated a hell of a lot more than I have now at 5'6.

 

 

 

I do acknowledge that short guys can date and marry women. I myself have actually had an amazing GF despite my height. I also know that she did not leave me because of my height.

 

What I'm saying is that being short makes dating harder. For most short men, their height is a handicap.

 

The best way I've heard being short described was by xxoo, "Shortness is at best a neutral."

 

There are no women out there who prefer or get turned on by short guys. While many women are turned on by tall guys. That's what short guys have to compete with.

 

Your height has nothing to do with the fact that you've had 1 gf in your life so far.

[somedude81]

Your height has nothing to do with the fact that you've had 1 gf in your life so far.

 

Considering I've had at least two girls that I liked tell me I was too short for them, I'm going to disagree with you.

[organizedchaos]

Considering I've had at least two girls that I liked tell me I was too short for them, I'm going to disagree with you.

So 2 girls in all your life is the explanation for your lack of success with women?

[somedude81]

So 2 girls in all your life is the explanation for your lack of success with women?

 

Not at all.

 

What I am saying is that if I was taller, there is a very strong chance I could have had 2 gf's in my life so far.

 

Getting back to the post you quoted.

 

Do you deny that I would be more physically attractive to women if I was average height?

[todreaminblue]

It's basically the same as effeminate …

 

 

 

eggs are masculine things...considering the chicken is extracting a football from a tiny wittle hole that i have actually never seen where an egg comes out of its that small.......i think a chicken woudl be slightly offended if i investigated......i think i need a frozen chicken..ill tell you all when i buy one.....definitely masculine if you go by a bbq chook which is a mans domain..:bunny: bbbq drools......eggplant on bbq more droollllll.......so i would suggest trying eggs on the barbie to instil masulinity...eggplants are feminne if you look at the shape and the color...go the egg...chicken i feel woudl prefer shorter eggs......just fo4 th elength fo tiem it takes to brith them.deb

[KaliLove]

I deny it! You're thinking about it from a very male perspective. You don't understand how women think.

[todreaminblue]

I deny it! You're thinking about it from a very male perspective. You don't understand how women think.

 

 

 

what are you denying kali can you clarify for me....deb

[organizedchaos]

Not at all.

 

What I am saying is that if I was taller, there is a very strong chance I could have had 2 gf's in my life so far.

 

Getting back to the post you quoted.

 

Do you deny that I would be more physically attractive to women if I was average height?

 

Yes because height is not your problem nor would it change your situation.

[todreaminblue]

you can be built like a line backer six foot four pecs like arnold,legs like massive tree trunks..... and not have an iota of an idea how to keep a woman satisfied has nothing to do with height it has something to do with attention span and your ability to feel you in your own skin is good enough......however that you is ...is always good enough if you feel good enough.....

 

 

dotn go fro women who look down on you...literally ....dont do it....they havent a right to judge your height.....an dyou dont have the right honestly to not b egreteful you have some height because you can walk around on legs given to you ...some men dotn even have those legs to walk on or the eyes to see a woman and yet they find women to date why si that somedude? someone less fortunate than you might get more dates please cnsider this and debate me if you can and explain why a guy if he stood woudl be four foot sopping wety..... out of a wheel chair and have to knucklewalk can marry and you are complaining.....i am trying to help i am sorry if i offend...............deb

[Anela]

I deny it! You're thinking about it from a very male perspective. You don't understand how women think.

 

I've denied it before - it did me no good.

[thefooloftheyear]

Considering I've had at least two girls that I liked tell me I was too short for them, I'm going to disagree with you.

 

 

I can almost say with 100% certainty that they lied to you...I know you probably dont want to hear this, but if there was another guy the same height as you that those women found more attractive, then it wouldnt have been any issue..And by attractive, I am not necessarily talking about looks..

 

Someday you are going to wake up and realize

 

You got 99 problems, but your height isnt one....

 

TFY

[Kid_Charlemange]

But, where you guys seem to get stuck in THIS thread is on the idea that the fact that you are short is the reason that you don't have a girlfriend, or a hookup or whatever.

 

I doubt it's the reason. But it is a reason.

 

We all bring a mix of qualities and attributes to the table as a "seller," and the "buyers" are all somewhat different, so it's dangerous to make broad statements.

 

For instance, Mike Tyson... if he hadn't been a rich and famous boxer, would Robin Givens even look twice at him? Let me rephrase: Were there any other fairly ugly, nearly illiterate, violent, uneducated thugs with 30+ arrests whom she might have dated?

 

And we all know of the rich old guys with hot young trophy wives, women who would be completely contemptuous of the same man if he were a retired postal worker.

 

So no, height alone won't stop someone from finding the woman of his dreams. 5'4" Micheal J. Fox seems to have done just fine. But... it is a barrier in some cases. That is, it reduces the number of possible partners. It does not eliminate them. It reduces them.

 

I'm fairly tall, but I'm bald. Some women won't date bald guys. Period. And I say, good for them; being honest about what you like and don't like is a virtue. Some women actually like the shaved-head look. And most women fall into the bell curve in the middle, where it's not really a factor... other things are, like personality, charm, intelligence, body type, etc etc. But I think it's safe to say that if I had a full head of hair, the pool of potential women would increase. Just like the guy who said his pool would increase if he were a little taller. I see nothing wrong with either statement.

[todreaminblue]

I doubt it's the reason. But it is a reason.

 

We all bring a mix of qualities and attributes to the table as a "seller," and the "buyers" are all somewhat different, so it's dangerous to make broad statements.

 

For instance, Mike Tyson... if he hadn't been a rich and famous boxer, would Robin Givens even look twice at him? Let me rephrase: Were there any other fairly ugly, nearly illiterate, violent, uneducated thugs with 30+ arrests whom she might have dated?

 

And we all know of the rich old guys with hot young trophy wives, women who would be completely contemptuous of the same man if he were a retired postal worker.

 

So no, height alone won't stop someone from finding the woman of his dreams. 5'4" Micheal J. Fox seems to have done just fine. But... it is a barrier in some cases. That is, it reduces the number of possible partners. It does not eliminate them. It reduces them.

 

I'm fairly tall, but I'm bald. Some women won't date bald guys. Period. And I say, good for them; being honest about what you like and don't like is a virtue. Some women actually like the shaved-head look. And most women fall into the bell curve in the middle, where it's not really a factor... other things are, like personality, charm, intelligence, body type, etc etc. But I think it's safe to say that if I had a full head of hair, the pool of potential women would increase. Just like the guy who said his pool would increase if he were a little taller. I see nothing wrong with either statement.

 

 

 

true that what you say ...respect given.....

 

 

 

....but

 

 

 

if you look at it in reverse .....if you want to get rid of someones unwarranted or unsolicited attention ....what would you do....point out their flaws that they might become defensive and stand their ground or if you wanted them to back off get them to retreat seeing that ground gained is not really worth it, such as a defeatist attitude or lack of fortitude,......you slowly and effectively point out your own flaws if you want to hinder a buyer.......you point out i know i am not tall, i know you dont normally go for bald men or short men or thin men or you struggle with dealing with me, i am so boring i use this quite effectively......,....you effectively lose interest instead of garner it...classic move which leaves the buyer happy he did not purchase said product......

 

you play up your attributes if you want a buyer.....also a classic move...you entice a buyer with the products you have that are top notch, strength of character perseverance, love compassion kindness......your ability to recognise the art of strategy whatever those strengths are you pander to those strengths.,...... you show them off front of store and you set the bar at the market that outranks outsells and outshines all competition.....its dog eat dog out there in the world...why i prefer to stay separate from it really cant be stuffed playing games......i lose on purpose...........

 

 

and you aim high if you want high....if you can dissuade a buyer from buying then that buyer was fickle in the first place and unlikely to stick around.......sort of a reverse psyche out.......you only want buyers who can stay the course....in my opinion the focus shouldnt be about height...napolean would back me up rather vigorously i feel..... a force to be reckoned with what was he five foot yet he commanded attention ....and fro soldeirs to stand to attention when he walked in a room.....little upstart.....lol...admirable though for sheer guts....like to see someone call him shortie ...i probablky would j=ust to riel him up...and watch him fly....deb

Edited June 14, 2014 by todreaminblue

[KaliLove]

Sorry Deb! I meant to reply to SD.

 

I deny that SD would be more attractive to women if he was taller. He's thinking like a man. Women are more attracted to personality..looks are secondary. Not to say that physical attraction is not important, but if a guy has a fantastic, shining, wonderful, outgoing, fun, intelligent personality, 90% of the time he can overcome most physical flaws. MOST..not all..sorry, but it's true.

Edited June 14, 2014 by KaliLove

[PJKino]

Sorry Deb! I meant to reply to SD.

 

I deny that SD would be more attractive to women if he was taller. He's thinking like a man. Women are more attracted to personality..looks are secondary. Not to say that physical attraction is not important, but if a guy has a fantastic, shining, wonderful, outgoing, fun, intelligent personality, 90% of the time he can overcome most physical flaws. MOST..not all..sorry, but it's true.

 

Can we stop with that nonsense that women are more attracted to personality both genders care about looks equally.. how much depends on the person and on how attractive that person is and how picky they can afford to be.Most couples are pretty evenly matched looks wise for that reason.

 

Most women who say looks dont matter probably cant afford to be picky about looks

 

If youre an average looking women whos with an average looking man that doesnt mean you dont care about looks at all and that women have a deeper level of attraction then men it means water usually seeks its own level in the dating world,stop acting like you[not u specifically] could have had the male "10" but passed on him because you dotn care about looks the truth is you couldnt afford to shop in that department anyway.

[thefooloftheyear]

Sorry Deb! I meant to reply to SD.

 

I deny that SD would be more attractive to women if he was taller. He's thinking like a man. Women are more attracted to personality..looks are secondary. Not to say that physical attraction is not important, but if a guy has a fantastic, shining, wonderful, outgoing, fun, intelligent personality, 90% of the time he can overcome most physical flaws. MOST..not all..sorry, but it's true.

 

 

Youre wrong....

 

My personality sucks and I have been beating women away my whole life...

 

Nice try

 

TFY

[KaliLove]

Youre wrong....

 

My personality sucks and I have been beating women away my whole life...

 

Nice try

 

TFY

 

You beat women????

 

You can pretend to be surly and mean all you want but you're a good guy. I can tell. So suck it!

[thefooloftheyear]

You beat women????

 

You can pretend to be surly and mean all you want but you're a good guy. I can tell. So suck it!

 

No, silly...

 

Its a figure of speech...

 

But really, now...There are MILLIONS of nice and sweet guys with great personalities that cant get laid in a whorehouse on Dollar Night...

 

 

Just sayin'

 

TFY

[BoringPerson]

I have struggled all my life in attracting women and getting girlfriends. I have only had a few girlfriends in my life.

 

Even when i was at my physical peak with sports and gym it helped very little.

 

I have been told to work on my personality, humor and confidence - but to be honest i have had no complaints about my personality or conversation skills in real life.

 

My only avenues of meeting women are on dating sites, or at bars/clubs and some times concerts. But i have little to no success.

 

I know for certain as it is my height. In the past i have women even tell me that.

[somedude81]

Sorry Deb! I meant to reply to SD.

 

I deny that SD would be more attractive to women if he was taller. He's thinking like a man. Women are more attracted to personality..looks are secondary. Not to say that physical attraction is not important, but if a guy has a fantastic, shining, wonderful, outgoing, fun, intelligent personality, 90% of the time he can overcome most physical flaws. MOST..not all..sorry, but it's true.

 

And that's what I'm talking about. Women trying to pretend that looks don't matter at all.

[somedude81]

I have struggled all my life in attracting women and getting girlfriends. I have only had a few girlfriends in my life.

 

Even when i was at my physical peak with sports and gym it helped very little.

 

I have been told to work on my personality, humor and confidence - but to be honest i have had no complaints about my personality or conversation skills in real life.

 

My only avenues of meeting women are on dating sites, or at bars/clubs and some times concerts. But i have little to no success.

 

I know for certain as it is my height. In the past i have women even tell me that.

Are you sure it's not because you're boring?

 

Anyways, there is a mega thread on height already and this thread will most likely be moved there very shortly.

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/transitioning/search/343363-consolidated-discussion-man-s-woman-s-height-search-relationships

[Weezy1973]

And that's what I'm talking about. Women trying to pretend that looks don't matter at all.

 

Yes, again couples tend to match up in terms of physical attractiveness and there are plenty of studies to support it. If looks didn't matter, this would not occur.

 

When it comes to attraction for women, looks do matter, but they're just one of many things that matter (sense of humour, intelligence, kindness, passion, work ethic, ambition etc.) and so the overall weight of looks is less than it is for men. For men (and some women), looks are definitely the dominant factor when it comes to attraction.

[somedude81]

Yeah I know that looks isn't as important to women as it is to men.

 

Though I'm saying that things are a hell of a lot easier for tall good looking guys. They don't have to work as hard with their sense of humour, intelligence, kindness, passion, work ethic, ambition etc. All they really have to do is try and not screw things up.

[R3d]

I can almost say with 100% certainty that they lied to you...I know you probably dont want to hear this, but if there was another guy the same height as you that those women found more attractive, then it wouldnt have been any issue..And by attractive, I am not necessarily talking about looks..

 

Okay, I understand that short men can get (hot) women, but this is just stretching it way too far - saying that 2 women who explicitly stated the reason for his rejection (height) are lying, when it's very well known that most women find short men physically unattractive.

 

That's implying that being short will not be a deal-breaker to not even a single woman in the world. Sorry bud, this is the real world. You can wish all you want that this was true.

 

Again, I am not saying short men can't get (hot) women. Look up Cupid Shmupid. He claims he's 5'2.125.

 

But there will be women who will reject you for that sole reason and it's safe to say that those two women did reject somedude81 for his height if they even went as far as to explicitly say so.

 

I also wanted to note that they say, "If she rejects you for your height, she's a terrible person." Not true. That's like calling me a terrible person for not wanting to date an obese woman. She can't help it! And neither can I! It doesn't make you a "terrible person". We're all shallow to some degree.