Consolidated Discussion - A man's/woman's height in the search for relationships

[BoringPerson]

Being short is a cop out excuse as to why you can't get dates. Plenty of short dudes date/get laid/get married. It's not your height, it's your personality. Own it, and fix it, and then you'll get girls.

 

By the way, I live in Hollywood. I guess that automatically makes me beautiful.

 

When i said i Hollywood i meant Hollywood as in movies, not the suburb....

 

I have never had complaints about my personality. How do you even know what my personality is or how to judge it?

 

When i go up to a girl and try talk to her at a bar or club how does she know how my personality is like when she rejects me in 5 seconds? Do woman also have mind reading powers? I wish women would give me a chance so i can show them my attractive personality.

 

A lot of my taller good looking friends hardly talk to the girls they take home for one night stands. I guess women are able to judge that they have awesome personalities some how....

[R3d]

As I have said before, that kind of thing has happened to me before quite a few times. Like half of the girls I went for so far walked away or ignored me right after I greeted them within seconds.

 

What about that?

[Glinda.Good]

Best assumption is he's getting laid. So, there's hope!!

 

Or … he grew.

[Pyro]

Life just isn't fair

[MidwestUSA]

In real life i never talk about this topic. In fact i agree to all of my friends (both male and female) advice that i should work on my personality, getting a new haircut and buying new clothes. All useless information by the way.

 

Women in bars and clubs dont talk to me not because of my 'lousy' personality but because i am unattractive.

 

 

How is the advice of your friends 'useless' if you're admitting to being unattractive? Start with a haircut and clothing. There's a reason they mention those things.

 

 

Funny, you're not the only guy in this thread who thinks there's NO WAY a woman can pick up on your attitude. It must be part of a syndrome. Oh yea, the victim mentality thing.

[William]

There are threads available, for free, to discuss personality, in general, in the search for relationships. In this thread, we're focusing on height and, to be sure, focusing in on members personally and using pejorative or disingenuous adjectives to describe them personally will be a one-way ticket to expulsion.

 

Or, as Robert would say, knock it off

[KathyM]

A short stature will limit a man's options to some extent. I don't think anyone can argue with that, since there are women who value height and would not date a shorter man. But there are certainly women who do not consider height to be a dealbreaker. If you have other things going for you, there are women who would appreciate those things and be willing to overlook the lack of height or it would not matter to them. If your personality is your winning quality, then go to venues where your personality can be appreciated. A bar is a meat market, and probably not the best place to win people over with your charming personality. Although there are people who go to bars with an attractive wingman who draws others to the group based on their looks, and the charmer will win these people over with their personality. I've seen it happen often enough.

[PJKino]

A short stature will limit a man's options to some extent. I don't think anyone can argue with that, since there are women who value height and would not date a shorter man. But there are certainly women who do not consider height to be a dealbreaker. If you have other things going for you, there are women who would appreciate those things and be willing to overlook the lack of height or it would not matter to them. If your personality is your winning quality, then go to venues where your personality can be appreciated. A bar is a meat market, and probably not the best place to win people over with your charming personality. Although there are people who go to bars with an attractive wingman who draws others to the group based on their looks, and the charmer will win these people over with their personality. I've seen it happen often enough.

 

Even when women try to patronize short men they still talk anout being short as if its like not having a leg or something lol like if youre some amazing person with a larger the life personality theyres a women out there who will somehow find the strength to look past your height

 

I never heard women with small breasts somehow having to overcompensate to make men forget about their small breasts and be some stand out amazing personalities to get a man

 

perhpas its beause as i always say men find more women physically appealing then vice versa,only the top % of men stand out for women

[KathyM]

Even when women try to patronize short men they still talk anout being short as if its like not having a leg or something lol like if youre some amazing person with a larger the life personality theyres a women out there who will somehow find the strength to look past your height

 

I never heard women with small breasts somehow having to overcompensate to make men forget about their small breasts and be some stand out amazing personalities to get a man

 

perhpas its beause as i always say men find more women physically appealing then vice versa,only the top % of men stand out for women

No doubt, women will be attracted to the most attractive men for the most part, but all these other guys are getting women to date them and even marry them. These other guys who may be short, or overweight, or average or below on the attractiveness scale. Women find other things attractive about men, and are willing to date and even marry them because of those other things. My niece is engaged to a man who most women would not find attractive physically, but he has a very winning personality which attracts women. He's very sociable, very engaging, and can hold a conversation about so many things, that women are just naturally drawn to his personality. All types of women. My niece is a very attractive woman. Probably an 8 on the attractiveness scale. Her fiance's looks would not be appealing to people, but his personality is very likeable and engaging, and so he wins people over with that. I know another man who is short, average looking, and kind of nerdy looking with glasses. He is married to a woman who most would consider a 9 in attractiveness. His personality is charming, engaging, and attractive. My point being that short stature is not a dealbreaker for some women, and by improving yourself in other ways, and playing up your strengths, especially improving your personality and your charm, you can compensate for your lack of height. For some women, your height will still be a dealbreaker. But for others, your positives will win them over. Focus on improving the things you can change about yourself, and you will have greater success.

[Bruce Leigh]

Focus on improving the things you can change about yourself, and you will have greater success.

 

This is the only thing you have real control over. Embrace it.

To expect other people to change how they think and feel is unrealistic.

[Badsingularity]

I hardly see a fat husband and slim wife unless the man is rich.

 

I am a fat husband with a slim wife and I am not rich. Matter of fact she makes more money than I do.

 

 

There are things other than appearances and money that attract women.

Edited June 16, 2014 by Badsingularity

[silicone]

It's all well people saying that there are other things than appearances and money that attract women, but let's face it; women are attracted to social status.

 

This is attributed by mainly three things: his peers, his money, his attractiveness.

 

A woman's not going to spend her life with someone she's not sexually attracted to.

[hasaquestion]

It's all well people saying that there are other things than appearances and money that attract women, but let's face it; women are attracted to social status.

 

This is attributed by mainly three things: his peers, his money, his attractiveness.

 

A woman's not going to spend her life with someone she's not sexually attracted to.

 

And 2/3 of those are things you control.

 

This is why I don't get the complaining. A girl who is a "5" will always be a "5". When you're a guy "5", you can game the system a bit through status.

[Imajerk17]

I guess I am confused as to what you "short men" want. This is what I am picking up are you "short men" are saying...

 

1. You seem to think that it is "unfair" that there are women who are writing you off for your height, and yet you reserve the right to write off women for their appearance. (Keep in mind that there are people of both genders who have to deal with chronic acne and who were born with unfavorable bone structure.) You don't think it's right that you have to settle for the "2 and 3s" who are attracted to you now, because pretty women ought to look past THEIR lack of attraction for you and give you a chance, so you can show them your "inner beauty".

 

2. Even with 1. in mind, you seem to be unable to get that you can still improve yourself to become attractive to women. You'd rather come on LS and whine and get people to sympathize with your plight. Self-pity is so hawt!

 

This seems to me to be what ALL of the "short men" posts are saying on here. This strikes me as really odd, and I am someone who has come down plenty hard on the women here.

Edited June 17, 2014 by Imajerk17

[ashy555]

I wouln't be too self conscious about it. You will find a woman who won't care. My cousin is a similar height.. maybe even a little shorter and he found a girl online who is 6ft2(185cm) She absolutely adores him. It took him a while to get used to it as he is very self conscious of his height, but she couldn't care less. They are a beautiful couple. He has actually had many girlfriends usually similar heigh or even a teeny bit taller than him.

 

As a girl who is 6foot... I have struggled myself. Growing up I hated my height and felt like a monster compared to all the boys. It has taken a while, but i have finally learnt to love it! Its a part of who you are

[plethora]

My boyfriend is 5' 6 and I'm 5' 3. His ex fiancée was 6 foot. To me personally it doesn't matter.

[R3d]

I guess I am confused as to what you "short men" want. This is what I am picking up are you "short men" are saying...

 

1. You seem to think that it is "unfair" that there are women who are writing you off for your height, and yet you reserve the right to write off women for their appearance. (Keep in mind that there are people of both genders who have to deal with chronic acne and who were born with unfavorable bone structure.) You don't think it's right that you have to settle for the "2 and 3s" who are attracted to you now, because pretty women ought to look past THEIR lack of attraction for you and give you a chance, so you can show them your "inner beauty".

 

2. Even with 1. in mind, you seem to be unable to get that you can still improve yourself to become attractive to women. You'd rather come on LS and whine and get people to sympathize with your plight. Self-pity is so hawt!

 

This seems to me to be what ALL of the "short men" posts are saying on here. This strikes me as really odd, and I am someone who has come down plenty hard on the women here.

 

Women do this too, by what people say here.

 

As humans, we do want the most attractive mate we can attract and we get pissed when a factor we cannot control prevents us from getting a mate that is as attractive as we want. This goes for both men and women. I don't blame either gender. It's human nature.

 

However, I see what hasaquestion says in that men do have some advantage when it comes to physical attractiveness since it's easier for men to make up for lack of it.

[El Brujo]

Ah, but what about a midget dude---say, 3 foot 11---who's a hell of a lot better looking than I am?

 

Behind my blue lucha libre mask, I look like freakin' Benito Mussolini! (or what Mussolini would look like if he had all the hair on his head)

[BoringPerson]

I guess I am confused as to what you "short men" want. This is what I am picking up are you "short men" are saying...

 

1. You seem to think that it is "unfair" that there are women who are writing you off for your height, and yet you reserve the right to write off women for their appearance. (Keep in mind that there are people of both genders who have to deal with chronic acne and who were born with unfavorable bone structure.) You don't think it's right that you have to settle for the "2 and 3s" who are attracted to you now, because pretty women ought to look past THEIR lack of attraction for you and give you a chance, so you can show them your "inner beauty".

 

2. Even with 1. in mind, you seem to be unable to get that you can still improve yourself to become attractive to women. You'd rather come on LS and whine and get people to sympathize with your plight. Self-pity is so hawt!

 

This seems to me to be what ALL of the "short men" posts are saying on here. This strikes me as really odd, and I am someone who has come down plenty hard on the women here.

 

Dont you find it a bit sad that a short guy who goes to the gym, plays sport, has a house and makes good money and is average or slightly above average in looks is told by other women and society that his dating league is a obese women or at best a chubby women?

 

Short men are upset because women view short men as the equivalent of a fat women. When its not the case as fat women can lose weight easy while a man cant change his height.

 

We are also sick of the double standards. There are obese female models posing with attractive male models promoting the 'big is beautiful' tag line, yet women treat short men as garbage, make fun of them, cringe at the thought of dating them or say they will never date a short man, Like i said many girls on dating sites openly state their height requirements, many female celebrities make fun of short men. But why cant i put on my profile i dont want a women that is larger then a certain waist size or no smaller then a cup size? Why do male celebrities who make fun of fat women or small breasted women get smashed in the media?

 

And remember this, even if its a one night stand most average and even good looking guys sleep with a fat and even obese women at least once (my good looking friends have told me the horror stories) yet a good looking women will never even give a short guy a chance for a one night stand, she wouldnt even speak to him or accept his existence.

 

I have come to the conclusion that women are very shallow with height and i am totally fine with that! Because i want to date a taller girl then me because i dont want my kids to be short. But i get really upset when i have standards as well and dont want to date fat women or women with no asses or breasts. And if a women does get upset at me for rejecting her i am going to say 'i cant chose who i am sexually attracted to"

 

Btw have you ever seen a women rejected before? It looks like she is almost to tears, cries why men are so shallow etc. Yet guys are meant to 'man up' and just take it. Funny that hey

[BoringPerson]

It's all well people saying that there are other things than appearances and money that attract women, but let's face it; women are attracted to social status.

 

This is attributed by mainly three things: his peers, his money, his attractiveness.

 

A woman's not going to spend her life with someone she's not sexually attracted to.

 

You cant really change your money as well. Some times you hit a 'ceiling' in your profession as well. Not all of us can be doctors or lawyers.

 

Money does not interest women in the 16-25 age range, it only attracts women say 28 and over, who are looking for a beta provider and wanting to get married fast. The only time money really 'buys' you a women is if you are a multi millionaire. Which is what 2% of the world?

 

Women dont need money today, they make the same money as men. Maybe 20 years ago owning a house and having above average pay would be impressive, but not today.

 

Explain why a asian or indian man who is a computer expert or doctor who makes over $300k a year will NEVER be able to date a attractive white women? Yet a attractive tall white male working at a dead end job like sales or personal trainer will be dating multiple women with out any hassle?

 

What about people from low income or average income families that couldn't go to university and are stuck in jobs? Even if they do work up the corporate ladder they will be close to 40 when they are making money to impress women.

 

Telling a guy to 'improve your earning capacity' to attract women is the equivalent of telling a homeless person to 'go out there and apply for jobs'

[todreaminblue]

Dont you find it a bit sad that a short guy who goes to the gym, plays sport, has a house and makes good money and is average or slightly above average in looks is told by other women and society that his dating league is a obese women or at best a chubby women?

 

Short men are upset because women view short men as the equivalent of a fat women. When its not the case as fat women can lose weight easy while a man cant change his height.

 

We are also sick of the double standards. There are obese female models posing with attractive male models promoting the 'big is beautiful' tag line, yet women treat short men as garbage, make fun of them, cringe at the thought of dating them or say they will never date a short man, Like i said many girls on dating sites openly state their height requirements, many female celebrities make fun of short men. But why cant i put on my profile i dont want a women that is larger then a certain waist size or no smaller then a cup size? Why do male celebrities who make fun of fat women or small breasted women get smashed in the media?

 

And remember this, even if its a one night stand most average and even good looking guys sleep with a fat and even obese women at least once (my good looking friends have told me the horror stories) yet a good looking women will never even give a short guy a chance for a one night stand, she wouldnt even speak to him or accept his existence.

 

I have come to the conclusion that women are very shallow with height and i am totally fine with that! Because i want to date a taller girl then me because i dont want my kids to be short. But i get really upset when i have standards as well and dont want to date fat women or women with no asses or breasts. And if a women does get upset at me for rejecting her i am going to say 'i cant chose who i am sexually attracted to"

 

Btw have you ever seen a women rejected before? It looks like she is almost to tears, cries why men are so shallow etc. Yet guys are meant to 'man up' and just take it. Funny that hey

 

 

you have some really strong issues that are causing you to luck out with women...one is the way you view women that is what i see first and foremost....secondly ,you have a cruel streak in you, a very judgmental one that is not warranted considering you are struggling, this i have gleaned from words not actions and one smiley face that is evident you actually want revenge, i would consider your demeanor isnt a happy one that incites a positive feeling in any woman.......deb

[MidwestUSA]

you have some really strong issues that are causing you to luck out with women...one is the way you view women that is what i see first and foremost....secondly ,you have a cruel streak in you, a very judgmental one that is not warranted considering you are struggling, this i have gleaned from words not actions and one smiley face that is evident you actually want revenge, i would consider your demeanor isnt a happy one that incites a positive feeling in any woman.......deb

 

 

 

Aw deb, on the mark as usual.

[man_in_the_box]

Dont you find it a bit sad that a short guy who goes to the gym, plays sport, has a house and makes good money and is average or slightly above average in looks is told by other women and society that his dating league is a obese women or at best a chubby women?

 

Dont you find it a bit sad that an overweight woman with a great personality, good humor, has a house and makes good money and is average or slightly above average in looks is told by other men and society that her dating league is a midget or at best a short guy?

[gaius]

My boyfriend is 5' 6 and I'm 5' 3. His ex fiancée was 6 foot. To me personally it doesn't matter.

Was she going to carry him over the threshold when they got married?

Dont you find it a bit sad that an overweight woman with a great personality, good humor, has a house and makes good money and is average or slightly above average in looks is told by other men and society that her dating league is a midget or at best a short guy?

That seems like enough to get any woman to drop a few pounds.

[Bruce Leigh]

Has anything new been said in here for a while?

For what its worth I read an article in Esquire that did not surprise me.

Only 4% of heterosexual couples had the female as the taller of the two.

Data was gathered at a college so make of that what you will.