Consolidated Discussion - A man's/woman's height in the search for relationships

[R3d]

R3d, why don't you just do an arranged marriage with a chick from India?

See, this is what I am talking about. Even after all that, I still have comments like this thrown at me, even after I explicitly stated that I am Americanized and am personally generally not attracted to my own race. And because I am not into the Indian ways of thinking and culture, Indian girls probably wouldn't be compatible with me anyway, unless they are Americanized themselves.

 

You may think they're hot and that's great. Everyone has different preferences. Neither is right or wrong. I am not putting anyone down here.

 

And honestly, if an Indian girl was into me, I'd give her a chance and go on a first date or two anyway, because you never know. She may be Americanized just like me and physical attraction can grow or already be there in some cases.

Edited September 17, 2014 by R3d

[Cristo]

See, this is what I am talking about. Even after all that, I still have comments like this thrown at me, even after I explicitly stated that I am Americanized and am personally generally not attracted to my own race. And because I am not into the Indian ways of thinking and culture, Indian girls probably wouldn't be compatible with me anyway, unless they are Americanized themselves.

 

You may think they're hot and that's great. Everyone has different preferences. Neither is right or wrong. I am not putting anyone down here.

 

And honestly, if an Indian girl was into me, I'd give her a chance and go on a first date or two anyway, because you never know. She may be Americanized just like me and physical attraction can grow or already be there in some cases.

 

Why does the girl have to be Americanized? Foreign girls are pretty awesome, man. Have you met many?

[R3d]

Why does the girl have to be Americanized? Foreign girls are pretty awesome, man. Have you met many?

 

Honestly man, I think you are right because if it was say Spanish or whatever, I would be happy to explore and give her a chance and see if it works out. I think it's more specifically Indian culture that I want to get away from. So yeah, I take that back and say that it's more Indian culture that I specifically am trying to avoid due to my insecurities and general disdain for it.

 

Then again, Indian girls aren't really "foreign" to me so that's another thing.

Edited September 17, 2014 by R3d

[R3d]

Also, I don't really dislike ALL of Indian culture either. Indian movies and music are good. The food is nice. The holidays and stories are cool.

 

There are other aspects and ways of thinking that I don't like or agree with. Generally the conservative nature of the culture.

 

But most of my shying away from Indian culture is due to my insecurities. Not so much that I HATE the culture.

 

So sorry, I got a little carried away and became a bit of a jerk there. Sorry about that. But yes, mostly it's my insecurities.

Edited September 17, 2014 by R3d

[Cristo]

Also, I don't really dislike ALL of Indian culture either. Indian movies and music are good. The food is nice. The holidays and stories are cool.

 

There are other aspects and ways of thinking that I don't like or agree with. Generally the conservative nature of the culture.

 

But most of my shying away from Indian culture is due to my insecurities. Not so much that I HATE the culture.

 

So sorry, I got a little carried away and became a bit of a jerk there. Sorry about that. But yes, mostly it's my insecurities.

 

You're sitting on a golden goose egg and you don't even know it. Basically, you could have it easy and get your parents to do the work. Pick the hottie for you. Then, with all of the social pressure from her family, she'll be more inclined to overlook the height thing. And, of course, she'll LIKE the Indian thing.

 

Instead, you want to date white girls who are the most likely to be superficial about things like race and height.

 

Sounds like some hardcore sadomasochism to me.

[R3d]

One thing that stands out to me here is the fact that you said you don't even want to date an Indian woman. You should understand completely then why some women might not want to date you. Also, you keep calling yourself "Americanized" like it's a compliment. Americans aren't exactly beloved around the world so it might not be a great thing to be more Americanized. Just a thought.

Yeah for me, it's mostly the lack of physical attraction in most cases, but I did say that if one was interested, and if I saw there was some potential for me to develop physical attraction, I WOULD go on at least a date or two with her.

 

So yes, I do understand why some women might not want to date me.

 

Here's the thing. When you people say "some" when referring to the group of people that won't date me, it sounds like a code word for like 99%. That's why this phrase fails to pacify me - because "some" is a very vague word. If it's 50, 60, 70, even 80% is NOT bad if we are talking about the percentage of women that will instantly disqualify me over my height and race and not even give me a first date, JUST FOR THOSE REASONS. But if it's like 99%, which it probably is at the moment due to me being in high school, then that's a problem.

 

But what do I do about my insecurity over my race? Recall those couple of posts where I explain in detail exactly why I am insecure over my race and how it expands further than dating.

Edited September 17, 2014 by R3d

[R3d]

Cristo, that's just wrong anyway. I wouldn't want to force a girl into a relationship with me. I want her to be with me because she wants to be with me.

 

And wait, I am not even looking to get married for another at least 7-10 years. Bro, I am only 16.

 

Let go of this arranged marriage suggestion. It's not happening. And it's not even relevant to me at this point in my life anyway.

[R3d]

If even 5% of the women I am interested in wouldn't instantly disqualify me, that would be satisfactory. So in other words, that "some" value that engima32 uses to describe the

percentage of women that will instantly disqualify me based on my height and race would be 95%. 95% is not bad. But if it's getting to 98, 99, 99.9, that's a problem.

 

You gotta remember that another condition that will be a dealbreaker for a lot of women is my decision to save myself until marriage. We haven't even factored that in yet.

[R3d]

Why would you go on a date or two? Is it because you don't have many other options at the moment? Women have plenty of options, even if some of those options are really just illusionary ones.

 

That (that I don't have any options at the moment), and you never know. Sometimes there is potential for attraction/chemistry to build up. Maybe she isn't into Indian traditions like me. There's even a possibility that she is but we turn out to be very compatible in other ways that make me overlook these things. You never know. If there was initially a slight bit of physical attraction, one date wouldn't hurt. But really, even if there's no physical attraction, it doesn't hurt to go on one date.

 

As for insecurity over race, this one actually feels valid because as we know, women (of all races) generally find Indian men least physically attractive. But even that is not as bad as the fact that if a non-Indian woman chooses to date an Indian man, she risks lowering her social status significantly. Social status is very important to women, not just to girls in high school. Heck, there are even women in their 30's rejecting (even breaking up with as in Kid_Charlamange's example) men on the basis of social status and her friends' opinions, from what I read online (primarily here). Also, because of all the judgments and stereotypes, she will probably jump to conclusions and right there I am out of the game.

 

You're not tall, rich, or good-looking. Well I am not either, so that's an even trade. But at least you aren't of an ethnicity that is generally looked down on and considered the bottom of the barrel here in 'Murica (sorry couldn't resist ).

[Imajerk17]

Honestly R3d, it actually makes me sad that you spend so much time on this thread. The time you spend on here overthinking and lamenting your height and race and how it affects your "prospects", would be better off spent socializing with your friends in school or pursuing your passions. That's more satisfying and more likely to help you achieve your goals for dating.

 

I can't think of anything more anyone could say to you that hasn't already been said.

 

My younger cousin, who is now in his junior year of college, is now no taller than 5'5". He barely dated in high school, but instead of spending time online, he spent his energy focusing on his studies (he is brilliant), running track, and playing lacrosse with his friends. Now he is in college and he has a cute girlfriend.

 

Things really are a lot more likely to work out as you want if you just go out and live your life dude. Seriously....

 

 

 

Yeah for me, it's mostly the lack of physical attraction in most cases, but I did say that if one was interested, and if I saw there was some potential for me to develop physical attraction, I WOULD go on at least a date or two with her.

 

So yes, I do understand why some women might not want to date me.

 

Here's the thing. When you people say "some" when referring to the group of people that won't date me, it sounds like a code word for like 99%. That's why this phrase fails to pacify me - because "some" is a very vague word. If it's 50, 60, 70, even 80% is NOT bad if we are talking about the percentage of women that will instantly disqualify me over my height and race and not even give me a first date, JUST FOR THOSE REASONS. But if it's like 99%, which it probably is at the moment due to me being in high school, then that's a problem.

 

But what do I do about my insecurity over my race? Recall those couple of posts where I explain in detail exactly why I am insecure over my race and how it expands further than dating.

Edited September 18, 2014 by Imajerk17

[R3d]

Honestly R3d, it actually makes me sad that you spend so much time on this thread. The time you spend on here lamenting your height and race, would be better off spent socializing with your friends in school or pursuing your passions.

 

I can't think of anything more anyone could say to you that hasn't already been said.

 

My younger cousin, who is now in his junior year of college, is now no taller than 5'5". He barely dated in high school, but instead of spending time online, he spent his energy focusing on his studies (he is brilliant), running track, and playing lacrosse with his friends. Now he is in college and he has a cute girlfriend.

 

Things really are a lot more likely to work out as you want if you just go out and live your life dude. Seriously....

 

As I have said in other threads, I am in the process right now of improving my social life, to the best of my ability. Honestly, not much can be done at this point because high school is very rigid. I am starting from almost ground zero here, but I am trying to do as much as I can by trying to be sociable in general with people around me, getting out of my comfort zone and talking to new people, joining clubs, and attending school events (soccer games, etc.) I also have asked out 3 girls already since the beginning of the school year (school's only been out for a little over 3 weeks). Like I said, I am trying and intend to keep doing so...indefinitely. Because that is all I can do.

 

Also, in the last almost two months, I haven't spent a whole lot of time in this thread until now.

 

You people have convinced me in terms of being able to get dates as a short man. Not for race though. I notice that you again site a short man succeeding in dating. That part is done dude. If I was short and in and of itself, I would have been convinced by now. The problem arises when it's coupled with being Indian. And if I was only Indian but tall and decent-looking, I still would probably only be half as insecure as I am now. It's the coupling of two that increases the intensity of my insecurity unproportionately. And I have explained many times in extensive detail why I am insecure over my race. No one has responded to that part of my post yet.

 

Also, I am quite successful in academics too (3.79 GPA after Sophomore year in a high ranking public school with mostly honors classes), especially with math (taking AP Calculus BC this year and so far enjoying the class and doing well in it) and very involved with violin. Self-improvement is also a backseat work in progress in terms of structuring my life so I am happy independently with no SO (there are specific things here that I am trying to do to achieve this).

 

I may be spending time here, but that doesn't mean I am not doing **** offline.

Edited September 18, 2014 by R3d

[R3d]

Also, I'll copy Kid_Charlamange's post here since I have been citing it a lot lately:

 

OK LS people, please settle a bet for me.

 

Background. Woman approached me on OKC. We live about 100 miles away, but the back and forth emails were pretty good. Decided to meet roughly "in between" for a first date at a winery. It goes great.

 

Dates 2-4 are each even better. We're really hitting it off. She keeps telling me how funny I am, and how amazed at how compatible we are.

 

We eventually arrange for an overnight meetup at a B&B. It goes fantastic. The sex is terrific. She meets some of my friends, I meet some of hers.

 

We text and FB chat for literally hours each night for two weeks, during which I'm to come visit her at her house. We spend the weekend together. Again, as far as I can tell, things are damn near perfect. Her cats even like me. The sex is better than before... all five times.

 

She emails me that Monday and says it's over, that she's tried to make this work, but there's something not there. We discuss it -- she keeps saying she feels so sad that this didn't work, because I was so "perfect" in almost every way -- and she finally comes clean. It's my physical looks. That she was so swayed by the wit, humor, intelligence, creativity, blah blah blah that she tried, REALLY TRIED, to get past the appearance, but knows she can't do it, so it's better to end it now before anyone gets hurt.

 

She's pretty, in a sort of non-traditional way, but has a simply incredible body. Yes, she's "out of my league" but so are 99% of the women on this planet. I get that.

 

A few friends have been shocked that we split, saying we seemed so great together. And this woman was all over me most of the time, slipping kisses in, caressing my butt, initiating sex in the middle of the night, etc. So yeah I was a little surprised that there was "no attraction." The friends are saying, "What a shallow *****!" but I've been defending her.

 

Look: This site, and many others, are filled with laments from ugly guys saying "If only women would give me a chance." Well... this one did. And for two months, she was trying to see if the other charms could outweigh the looks. And rather than string me along and potentially break my heart a few months or even years down the road, she made a clean break. Yes, I was very in to her. She's the first woman I've dated since my last LTR that I could see myself being with forever. I was smitten.

 

So, which is right?

1) Never giving an ugly guy a chance at all (which is what most women do)

2) Giving him a chance until you're pretty sure his other charms, considerable though they may be, just can't overcome his looks.

 

I think answer 2) is admirable. I have zero regrets, and zero animosity for this woman, and in fact after a "cooling off" period I very much hope we can remain friends.

 

Wow, just reading that story is heartbreaking (I was shocked when I first read that). I can only imagine how I'd feel if that happened to me (minus the sex part because I am saving myself until marriage and definitely not having sex before exclusivity in a relationship), in the extremely small likelihood that I even got that far. Though the sex here plays an important role in this story because it indicates if you read between the lines, that it's not that she wasn't physically attracted to him, but (here's the inference) after consulting with her girlfriends, she realized he wasn't good arm-candy and that "she can do better".

 

And this is from a man who has an excellent personality and has fantastic compatibility with her. Jaw-droppingly shocking.

Edited September 18, 2014 by R3d

[R3d]

Allow me to go slightly off-topic here, but here are the problems I have as a result of what I have discussed in this thread:

 

That sucks bro.

 

I am just going to derail this thread a bit and say that reading these stories where the guy is interested in someone and it seems like she is interested too and then BAM, she's not (and I have read thousands of stories like this, some really severe like Kid_Charlamagne's case) kind of make me feel uneasy because girls have never shown any interest in me of any kind. Like all I have had to deal with is simple rejections where the girl didn't seem interested anyway. Basically, no girl has ever flirted with me in real life.

 

This is alarming because as a result of this and other factors, I know that I am prone to falling for the first girl that shows an ounce of interest. Reading these kind of stories make me feel a bit uneasy because it is an indication that more than likely the first girl that dhows interest will just be leading me on and become distant the second I make a move. If even that happens (right now I am worried if I will even get that - see consolidated height discussion thread), it will be heartbreaking because most likely just be a lead on, and due to never having had a girl flirt with me plus being insecure plus being a little desperate plus having an extraordinary tendency and capacity to daydream and fantasize, I will feel heartbroken. The alarming aspect of this is the increased likeliness of me feeling this mild (real heartbreak is a breakup) heartbreak when this happens due to me never having been flirted with, insecurity, inexperience, and desperation.

 

You gotta remember, any girl that flirts with me that I am interested in will feel like finding a diamond because right now (if you see the cobsolidated height discussion thread), it feels as if almost every woman (like approaching 100%) will immediately not be interested due to my height and race and the lack of physical attraction that goes with it. I will still keep looking.

 

It's like being a storekeeper and no one walks into your store and you try doing a bunch of things and still no one shows up. Then 5 years later, one guy walks in and gets your hopes up, but then walks out without buying anything.

 

That's the kind of feeling I anticipate I will feel with the first girl that actually shows interest and probably be leading me on I meet.

 

This is also problematic because I will probably always be the person who likes her more than she likes me and therefore, the women I date (if I get any dates) will always have power over me (I hate this whole power thing in dating, but it does exist so...)

[R3d]

Adding on to three posts ago, I barely have any actual friends, because well, that's how it's always been throughout grade school. But like I said, I am trying to improve my situation to the best of my ability.

 

I am looking forward to college though because there I'll get a reset...

 

EDIT: AYYY...post 444!

Edited September 18, 2014 by R3d

[Imajerk17]

OK. I almost forgot about being Indian as I know of plenty of Indian dudes who do quite well with women. A girl I had a crush on in college went for an Indian guy instead of me. And he was nothing special in terms of looks. I think he weighed 130 pounds soaking wet. Thing is, he has a wry sense of humor and didn't seem to take things so seriously.

 

So RE your hobbies and your doing so well with school, you have the "smart" stuff covered, why not lift weights or take up a martial art.

 

This has been said over and over again in this thread in how many different ways. There are plenty of guys who have far bigger obstacles than you have and they do fine w women. They aren't spending their time lamenting things they can't control such their height, race, or looks though. At the end of the day, with dating it pretty much goes like this: Whether you think you can or think you can't, you are right. Pretty much.

 

As I have said in other threads, I am in the process right now of improving my social life, to the best of my ability. Honestly, not much can be done at this point because high school is very rigid. I am starting from almost ground zero here, but I am trying to do as much as I can by trying to be sociable in general with people around me, getting out of my comfort zone and talking to new people, joining clubs, and attending school events (soccer games, etc.) I also have asked out 3 girls already since the beginning of the school year (school's only been out for a little over 3 weeks). Like I said, I am trying and intend to keep doing so...indefinitely. Because that is all I can do.

 

Also, in the last almost two months, I haven't spent a whole lot of time in this thread until now.

 

You people have convinced me in terms of being able to get dates as a short man. Not for race though. I notice that you again site a short man succeeding in dating. That part is done dude. If I was short and in and of itself, I would have been convinced by now. The problem arises when it's coupled with being Indian. And if I was only Indian but tall and decent-looking, I still would probably only be half as insecure as I am now. It's the coupling of two that increases the intensity of my insecurity unproportionately. And I have explained many times in extensive detail why I am insecure over my race. No one has responded to that part of my post yet.

 

Also, I am quite successful in academics too (3.79 GPA after Sophomore year in a high ranking public school with mostly honors classes), especially with math (taking AP Calculus BC this year and so far enjoying the class and doing well in it) and very involved with violin. Self-improvement is also a backseat work in progress in terms of structuring my life so I am happy independently with no SO (there are specific things here that I am trying to do to achieve this).

 

I may be spending time here, but that doesn't mean I am not doing **** offline.

Edited September 18, 2014 by Imajerk17

[thefooloftheyear]

Also, I'll copy Kid_Charlamange's post here since I have been citing it a lot lately:

 

 

 

Wow, just reading that story is heartbreaking (I was shocked when I first read that). I can only imagine how I'd feel if that happened to me (minus the sex part because I am saving myself until marriage and definitely not having sex before exclusivity in a relationship), in the extremely small likelihood that I even got that far. Though the sex here plays an important role in this story because it indicates if you read between the lines, that it's not that she wasn't physically attracted to him, but (here's the inference) after consulting with her girlfriends, she realized he wasn't good arm-candy and that "she can do better".

 

And this is from a man who has an excellent personality and has fantastic compatibility with her. Jaw-droppingly shocking.

 

I wasnt shocked when I read it....Your inexperience in life is obvious here, understand I am not criticising you for it...

 

Guys do that kind of stuff to women all the time..Heck ,I have done it to women a couple of times, when I was younger and more of a jerk than I already am now....Only difference is I just disappeared and spared her the disappointment and the letdown...Sometimes its less painful than actually telling the truth...

 

But seriously... Sounds like she was horny and needed some attention...Once that itch was scratched she moved on....Most women would(and do) the very same thing...Heck some dope woman is doing this very thing outlined in K.S.post to a buddy of mine right now as we speak..He is just now realizing the game..The only thing that sort of surprises me is that she actually told the truth...most would have just gone cold and gradually disappeared or used some other bs or generic "excuse"

 

Listen man....You. and some other posters are trying to make it like there is some "rule book" or "code of ethics" when it comes to this....Unfortunately there isnt...People do stuff for a whole variety of reasons and none of it is essentially "fair"....

 

But as they say...."it is what it is"

 

TFY

Edited September 18, 2014 by thefooloftheyear

[R3d]

Well of course. I am 16 with no dating experience. That is to be expected.

 

How are you supposed tell apart actual interest from attention-whoring? Is there anyway to avoid this or at least minimize the chances of it happening?

 

Becuase from what it seems, it seemed like she really liked him, especially with her commenting on compatibility. It's funny because I am asking about it and it didn't even happen to me. Fact is, this is actually one of my major dating fears (recall that post about me worrying about getting led on a few posts ago in this thread). I am already weak and vulnerable due to insecurity, inexperience, and desperation. I am actually very prone to this kind of thing in the future.

 

But that's actually one of many reasons I have decided to save myself until marriage. At least, I won't get pumped and dumped that way.

 

Sorry guys, it seems like every few weeks, I have a bunch of things that I am confused about and trying to figure out so I ask a lot of questions, even if they seem pointless or not relevant until way in the future. But I have always been that way - I worry about and try to find solutions to even problems that I probably won't experience many years down the road, and this has always been a quirk of mine. I have some more stuff to ask. I appreciate your patience and cooperation during these periods.

[somedude81]

Honestly dude, it's kind of weird seeing somebody as young as you post so much on here, and all you're doing is theorizing.

 

You haven't even started your life yet. Nobody know how things will turn out.

 

Stopping worrying about whatever issue you have and just go talk to girls. If you're having problems with girls, then post here and the guys will give you advice.

[R3d]

Well, I would ageee that me theorizing over Kid_Charlamange's incident is overkill. But the other stuff - the percentage of women that I am interested in that won't instantly disqualify me for example - is relevant. I will explain why in detail in my next post where I will ask any other questions I have right now.

 

EDIT: 2222!!!!!!!!

[somedude81]

Well, I would ageee that me theorizing over Kid_Charlamange's incident is overkill. But the other stuff - the percentage of women that I am interested in that won't instantly disqualify me for example - is relevant. I will explain why in detail in my next post where I will ask any other questions I have right now.

 

No, none of that stuff about percentages and theories is relevant.

 

How are you going to apply it to your life?

 

OK, so if you learned that only 5% of the women you interact will be interested in you. How are you going to apply that data?

 

How about a question that actually affects your life right now?

 

Are there any girls that you are trying to get to know better?

[R3d]

Well I did say that 5% is not that bad since that means that for every 20 girls I ask out, one will say "yes". Not ideal...but okay. Not bad. The danger zone starts at 97% (for not interested). After that the ratios get extremely bad really fast. Like 99 means I have to ask out 100 girls. 99.9, means I have to ask out 1,000, etc.

 

Okay, now why am I concerned with this? It's because compared to the average white man, much less women will even go on a first date with me. Right now, it's like finding a needle in a haystack. Notice how even average white men getting a reasonable amount of dates still have quite a bit of trouble finding a compatible partner. Remember, I said that I am worked up over this because I feel like it will make it not just difficult but nearly impossible to find someone compatible (I am not really even talking about now - this will be true for my whole life) due to my tiny dating pool. And this leads me to something else. They advised me to not just fall for the first girl that doesn't run away and make sure I actually like her. My response is: what else can I do? Again, theoretical, but it is quite important because it's important to have the right mindset. They also keep telling me, "You'll find someone." My response is: what do you mean by that? Do you mean just some girl that won't instantly disqualify me over my height and race or actually someone that I have good chemistry/compatibility with? Because if you are saying the former, then that contradicts with the whole, "Don't just take whatever the universe throws at you," advice that I have gotten numerous times.

 

Also, the reason I am not asking about any specific girls is because in the past, I have already asked about what to do ad nauseum and I have an idea of what to do so far. But if I have any questions regarding specific girls, I'll definitely ask.

 

Quick questions:

 

How am I supposed to be proud of my ethnicity after all that, like they keep advising me to?

 

Also, if a girl asks me about my ethnicity, what do I say? The reason I ask is I am afraid she will run away if I tell her with all the presumptions.

 

Again, thank you for all this assistance.

Edited September 18, 2014 by R3d

[IttyBittyKitty]

Hi y'all..long time reader first time post. I just wanted to say that I'm 5'2 and I prefer guys who are short. It hurts my neck to look so far up with taller guys. So see not all girls want tall guys!

[somedude81]

 

Quick questions:

 

How am I supposed to be proud of my ethnicity after all that, like they keep advising me to?

 

 

 

Also, if a girl asks me about my ethnicity, what do I say? The reason I ask is I am afraid she will run away if I tell her with all the presumptions.

 

Tell the girls that you're Chinese.

 

LOL, what kind of question are you asking?

 

You're Indian. You can't hide it. Be proud of your ethnicity.

[R3d]

Also somedude81, if you really want to know, there's a girl in my math class that I am interested in at the moment. I just started talking to her (so far barely as we are just getting started).

[jay1983]

Well I did say that 5% is not that bad since that means that for every 20 girls I ask out, one will say "yes". Not ideal...but okay. Not bad. The danger zone starts at 97% (for not interested). After that the ratios get extremely bad really fast. Like 99 means I have to ask out 100 girls. 99.9, means I have to ask out 1,000, etc.

 

Okay, now why am I concerned with this? It's because compared to the average white man, much less women will even go on a first date with me. Right now, it's like finding a needle in a haystack. Notice how even average white men getting a reasonable amount of dates still have quite a bit of trouble finding a compatible partner. Remember, I said that I am worked up over this because I feel like it will make it not just difficult but nearly impossible to find someone compatible (I am not really even talking about now - this will be true for my whole life) due to my tiny dating pool. And this leads me to something else. They advised me to not just fall for the first girl that doesn't run away and make sure I actually like her. My response is: what else can I do? Again, theoretical, but it is quite important because it's important to have the right mindset. They also keep telling me, "You'll find someone." My response is: what do you mean by that? Do you mean just some girl that won't instantly disqualify me over my height and race or actually someone that I have good chemistry/compatibility with? Because if you are saying the former, then that contradicts with the whole, "Don't just take whatever the universe throws at you," advice that I have gotten numerous times.

 

Also, the reason I am not asking about any specific girls is because in the past, I have already asked about what to do ad nauseum and I have an idea of what to do so far. But if I have any questions regarding specific girls, I'll definitely ask.

 

Quick questions:

 

How am I supposed to be proud of my ethnicity after all that, like they keep advising me to?

 

Also, if a girl asks me about my ethnicity, what do I say? The reason I ask is I am afraid she will run away if I tell her with all the presumptions.

 

Again, thank you for all this assistance.

 

I have a lebanese flag tattooed on my leg. I wear my heritage proudly. If they don't like it, fu*k em.

 

Most women that are interested in me are hispanic. What's wrong with Indian girls or other ethnicities?