miamai Posted August 30, 2012 Share Posted August 30, 2012 so i am about to start a sexual relationship with a guy i really, really like. we have an intense attraction to each other, both physically and mentally. he tells me that he thinks i am 'dead sexy' which shocked me because no one has ever called me sexy let alone dead sexy. so i have gained weight and dropped over my life. right now i am losing weight and about 20 lbs from my goal weight. BUT i noticed that my body is not bouncing back like it had before. my inner thighs look horrid. the weight loss has left me with saggy-like skin there. not big chunks hanging off mind you, just flabby looking. i am terribly embarrassed by this and i have been working out religiously hoping that i can tone it up. i am also using different lotions to help. the rest of my body i am okay with. smaller waist, little bit of butt/hips, smaller chest but still good. so because he thinks i am so sexy with clothes on, i worry that he will be disappointed when he sees me naked - especially my inner thighs because, well, he really wants to 'taste me' and it would be pretty hard to hide my thighs at that point. so i guess what i am asking is guys, if you really like a girl and truly think she is sexy, but when you finally get her naked and you see she has an issue such as mine, are you disappointed and turned off? what if the sex was amazing, does that help? lol thanks for your replies in advance. Link to post Share on other sites
Hawaii50 Posted August 30, 2012 Share Posted August 30, 2012 If he thinks you're sexy, and means it, then you have nothing to worry about. We're humans, and hopefully he doesn't expect you to live to an "Elle" magazine model (Which by now all men know are fake/photoshopped) There isn't much you can do either way but maintain a healthy lifestyle and find someone who does truly find you sexy. So hopefully this is him. I'm sure you have 10 other attributes that overcome anyone one thing you're worried about.. I think it's more you focusing on something you see. Chances are he won't even notice, he's finally made to the promised land and... chances are, he's nervous and worried about certain aspects of himself too. relax, be comfortable, enjoy your new partner. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted August 30, 2012 Share Posted August 30, 2012 I think by the time he gets down to your inner thighs, any flabbiness on them is going to be the last thing on his mind! For your first time, just be prepared with flattering lighting - candlelight. Candlelight is universally flattering and will allow him to see you without showcasing any flaws. And - three candles set around the room is the perfect number. LOL. Link to post Share on other sites
january2011 Posted August 30, 2012 Share Posted August 30, 2012 (edited) Not a guy, but I hope my perspective will still be helpful. Based on my experience as a woman, the guys I've been with don't seem to be too worried about "imperfections." At it's crudest, they are just happy to get "some." That is, if it's just sex for him, he will most likely be happy just to get laid. If it's not, he will care enough about you that he will look past what you perceive to be your flaws. If he doesn't, then he's probably not a keeper. Your best bet is to just go with the flow and leave your insecurities at the door. There is probably nothing worse than trying to have sex with someone who can't relax and just have fun. Having said that, if you really are concerned, then just talk it out with him. Tell him that you're feeling a little self-conscious about your body. He will most likely reassure you and tell you that he doesn't care (doesn't see what you see) and likes/loves you for who you are. Just believe him. Edited August 30, 2012 by january2011 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author miamai Posted August 30, 2012 Author Share Posted August 30, 2012 If he thinks you're sexy, and means it, then you have nothing to worry about. We're humans, and hopefully he doesn't expect you to live to an "Elle" magazine model (Which by now all men know are fake/photoshopped) There isn't much you can do either way but maintain a healthy lifestyle and find someone who does truly find you sexy. So hopefully this is him. I'm sure you have 10 other attributes that overcome anyone one thing you're worried about.. I think it's more you focusing on something you see. Chances are he won't even notice, he's finally made to the promised land and... chances are, he's nervous and worried about certain aspects of himself too. relax, be comfortable, enjoy your new partner. thank you. he does say that i have many other good qualities about me. he has had a thing for me for 3 years, unbeknownst to me, and i have for him as well. BTW - love your tag line and agree. he is not the best looking guy i have been with but he makes me laugh so much and our sense of humor is identical. he makes me very happy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author miamai Posted August 30, 2012 Author Share Posted August 30, 2012 I think by the time he gets down to your inner thighs, any flabbiness on them is going to be the last thing on his mind! For your first time, just be prepared with flattering lighting - candlelight. Candlelight is universally flattering and will allow him to see you without showcasing any flaws. And - three candles set around the room is the perfect number. LOL. i have read that candlelight is good, just wasn't sure if it was true! Link to post Share on other sites
Author miamai Posted August 30, 2012 Author Share Posted August 30, 2012 Not a guy, but I hope my perspective will still be helpful. Based on my experience as a woman, the guys I've been with don't seem to be too worried about "imperfections." At it's crudest, they are just happy to get "some." That is, if it's just sex for him, he will most likely be happy just to get laid. If it's not, he will care enough about you that he will look past what you perceive to be your flaws. If he doesn't, then he's probably not a keeper. Your best bet is to just go with the flow and leave your insecurities at the door. There is probably nothing worse than trying to have sex with someone who can't relax and just have fun. Having said that, if you really are concerned, then just talk it out with him. Tell him that you're feeling a little self-conscious about your body. He will most likely reassure you and tell you that he doesn't care (doesn't see what you see) and likes/loves you for who you are. Just believe him. that is an excellent point: "That is, if it's just sex for him, he will most likely be happy just to get laid. If it's not, he will care enough about you that he will look past what you perceive to be your flaws." thank you, that helps greatly. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dollface07 Posted August 31, 2012 Share Posted August 31, 2012 miamai, congratulations on finding each other Okay since I am a more superficial person who posts on LoveShack hehe I think I have a plan can't you wear a sexy outfit that opens up at the crotch? Like I am like you 20 pounds from my ideal weight I was 173 and now I am 155 and I want to be 135 like I was before the problem is that my breasts are a bit droopy now so I always try to keep a sexy outfit on the top that keeps the girls supported haha so for your situation you could wear an outfit where you get to keep high thigh high with a wide band and garter belt to keep the inner thigh situation all sorted...something then you will feel more confident and comfortable to relax with him As per the creme situation to tighten up that area I think there are two cremes that may help from the clairins line that you can mix with your normal body cremes too. Good luck and stay pretty Link to post Share on other sites
Nikki Sahagin Posted September 2, 2012 Share Posted September 2, 2012 As a friend of mine once said, 'most guys are so grateful just to get some they don't even notice half the things you think they will.' Just be confident Link to post Share on other sites
TLY22 Posted September 7, 2012 Share Posted September 7, 2012 Confidence is sexy. Take charge. Besides the fact that he won't care about your 'flaws', if you take charge and own your body, you'll have him drooling to touch you. He already thinks you're a bombshell; he's not going to look at you in any other light. Link to post Share on other sites
2sure Posted September 7, 2012 Share Posted September 7, 2012 Confidence is sexy. Take charge. Besides the fact that he won't care about your 'flaws', if you take charge and own your body, you'll have him drooling to touch you. He already thinks you're a bombshell; he's not going to look at you in any other light. Very important truth. Be confident, be beautiful. Don't cover up, walk across the room naked like its a red carpet. It works. Men have mistaken me for sexy for years! X Link to post Share on other sites
FitChick Posted September 7, 2012 Share Posted September 7, 2012 Just pray he isn't a Virgo or have Virgo in his chart. Link to post Share on other sites
denise_xo Posted September 7, 2012 Share Posted September 7, 2012 I think by the time he gets down to your inner thighs, any flabbiness on them is going to be the last thing on his mind Yes, that's what I think, too. Just relax and enjoy your relationship Link to post Share on other sites
yessy21 Posted September 7, 2012 Share Posted September 7, 2012 Everything will be fine! We as humans overanalyze every aspect of our own body. Link to post Share on other sites
Hawaii50 Posted September 7, 2012 Share Posted September 7, 2012 Why!!! lol Link to post Share on other sites
SandRat Posted September 7, 2012 Share Posted September 7, 2012 so i am about to start a sexual relationship with a guy i really, really like. we have an intense attraction to each other, both physically and mentally. he tells me that he thinks i am 'dead sexy' which shocked me because no one has ever called me sexy let alone dead sexy. so i have gained weight and dropped over my life. right now i am losing weight and about 20 lbs from my goal weight. BUT i noticed that my body is not bouncing back like it had before. my inner thighs look horrid. the weight loss has left me with saggy-like skin there. not big chunks hanging off mind you, just flabby looking. i am terribly embarrassed by this and i have been working out religiously hoping that i can tone it up. i am also using different lotions to help. the rest of my body i am okay with. smaller waist, little bit of butt/hips, smaller chest but still good. so because he thinks i am so sexy with clothes on, i worry that he will be disappointed when he sees me naked - especially my inner thighs because, well, he really wants to 'taste me' and it would be pretty hard to hide my thighs at that point. so i guess what i am asking is guys, if you really like a girl and truly think she is sexy, but when you finally get her naked and you see she has an issue such as mine, are you disappointed and turned off? what if the sex was amazing, does that help? lol thanks for your replies in advance. Send me some pictures and I'll tell you what I think. Link to post Share on other sites
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