One example to her

[wanting more]

I'm really not. I don't want to protect him. I don't want him. He has completely broken my heart (again) and it hurts , bad. She wants him, obviously he wants her.

[Spark1111]

i sent her was that we were together a month ago out of town. while lying in bed his hotel room phone rang twice then stopped, it started ringing again and when he answered i realized it was her, checking on him. she had done this a couple times in the past year that i know about because i was in the room. the text was about this particular time. me hearing the conversation he had with her on the phone. how could she deny i was in the room with him??? how could he turn that around??? there would be NO reason for me to know she still calls the hotel rooms to make sure he's in there. to make sure he is where he said he would be. was that vengeful to send??? was it not enough for her to see we're still seeing each other???? how could he talk his way out of that one?? am i that stupid to think this wasn't some sort of proof we're still seeing each other???

 

Hard to say, WM.

 

Depends what the conversation was, how specific you were in detailing it, how good he is at convincing her you are crazy and making all of this up.

 

See what I mean?

 

However, there is NO denying what is written in black and white, like emails, cards, etc.

 

Your call.

[BetrayedH]

i sent her was that we were together a month ago out of town. while lying in bed his hotel room phone rang twice then stopped, it started ringing again and when he answered i realized it was her, checking on him. she had done this a couple times in the past year that i know about because i was in the room. the text was about this particular time. me hearing the conversation he had with her on the phone. how could she deny i was in the room with him??? how could he turn that around??? there would be NO reason for me to know she still calls the hotel rooms to make sure he's in there. to make sure he is where he said he would be. was that vengeful to send??? was it not enough for her to see we're still seeing each other???? how could he talk his way out of that one?? am i that stupid to think this wasn't some sort of proof we're still seeing each other???

 

Hmm. I suppose it would be hard to explain how you had knowledge of a conversation she had with him but I think you would probably admit it's not the most incriminating piece of evidence in the world. At minimum, I would expect he would minimize it as it doesn't indicate that you had a 3 year affair with him. It was just the best thing you had immediately available at the time. It's pretty minimal compared to "I Love You's" from him or sext messages between you.

 

I really don't want to twist your arm any further. But I think it is healthy for you to keep analyzing this so you can ultimately feel good that you looked rationally at the options and made the right choice. I think it's good that you hesitate over doing it vindictively. Exposing out of revenge (or as some do, to devastate the marriage and win the MM) is probably not healthy for you and should give you some pause. In the end, I hope you do it for the sake of the BS and so that you can walk away knowing that (with an apology) you did something to atone for your part. That is healthy (or at least healthier) for both women. I hope you find the strength to wrap up this loose end and that you find some peace for yourself as well.