GuyInLimbo Posted August 31, 2012 Share Posted August 31, 2012 This is more of a hypothetical, since I'm still married, but in the planning stages of getting out. Anyway, about 5 years ago, met someone at work, who I find very attractive. She's the type of woman that seems to blow away every guy she meets. All the guys had a thing for her. Anyway, about 2 years ago, she moved from NY to Chicago (transferred) with her husband and two young kids. Earlier this year, she left the job and went to another company. For whatever reason, I seem to be the only guy she stays in contact with. When I went out to visit (for work) the last time, we had dinner and drinks together and had a great time - but she went straight home after that. She always seems to reach out to me via text every few weeks, etc. Yet, there has been no direct romantic overtures from her ever towards me. (Yes, she's married, but mention of the husband and status of their relationship has always been rather vague). So, is this a simple case of me being a great platonic friend, or am I unable to read through any of the lines? (which is often the case for me in the past) As I look towards moving on in my life, I don't feel like wasting more energy on relationships that really won't lead to anything. I have enough women friends as it is. Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted August 31, 2012 Share Posted August 31, 2012 What do you guys talk about ? When do you have these dates ? Link to post Share on other sites
Author GuyInLimbo Posted August 31, 2012 Author Share Posted August 31, 2012 What do you guys talk about ? When do you have these dates ? What do we talk about? Life, work, families (kids). Whatever comes up. Whenever we've gone out, the hours fly by with all the conversation, so it's not awkward or anything. But, again, nothing romantic has ever come up. I don't know if I'd call them dates or not... But, really, only when she comes to NY or I go to Chicago. Unfortunately, that's few a far between now that we've both changed jobs recently. It may be nothing at all. Who knows. But I've been the type of person who doesn't speak up with regards to my needs and interests. I've been told in IC that sometimes I should just come out and say it, as you never know what the other person is thinking. And perhaps next time I see her, I will. Link to post Share on other sites
strongnrelaxed Posted September 3, 2012 Share Posted September 3, 2012 You should expect to get slammed for this post. My honest advice is that you stay out of any relationship for a while. If you are still in the planning stages of divorce, the only legitimate sort of relationship you should even think of entertaining is a physical one to meet your needs for sex. Just make sure you are honest with the woman about this. Your feelings for this woman are clearly more than platonic and I cannot think of one reason why this is NOT a horrible idea. Let it go and attend to the mess that you are currently in. I know it will be difficult and that you are probably in a low place and in need of comfort. Do not make the mistake of a bad relationship at this point in your life. Be strong and be smart. Stay single for a few years. Get your act together and things will start to make sense again. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author GuyInLimbo Posted September 4, 2012 Author Share Posted September 4, 2012 Point taken. Good advice, actually. Just more of a curiosity thing than anything else, really. Link to post Share on other sites
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