digger Posted July 19, 2004 Share Posted July 19, 2004 Yeah ive pleaded and begged for No divorce. Last friday i sent her a simple email saying if she wanted to talk to meet me at such and such. This morning i got a reply saying i used the company email (by mistake) and she doesnt want everybody to know her business and shes glad im on Xanax, she thot i needed to be along time ago...and please dont write her again. I called her mother and she said theres no talking her out of it, thats shes just tired of all the fighting and that i shouldnt expect her to change her mind. All this 6 months after we were lafing on Xmas. Shes just so hard boiled its useless to talk to her and i dunno what to do. Except to accept it which is unbearable after being with her for 21 years. Shes the only one i ever loved. I thot i was for her to. But since the divorce papers arrived shes akin to turning from 12 oclock to 6 oclock and its unlike her at any time ive ever known her. Should i give it up? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony Posted July 19, 2004 Senior Moderators Share Posted July 19, 2004 It often happens this way. Your best chances of ever getting back with her is if you disappear from her life. One day, her curiousity will build and she'll contact you. People often change, their needs change, their perception of life changes. What your wife wanted out of life and out of a mate 21 years ago may not be what she wants now. All you can do is respect that and give her space. If you closely bonded with her, time will bring her back. If you didn't, the significant lessons you have learned from this heartbreak will help you work through the healing process and move on to a better life. Something is very seriously wrong somewhere when two people have been together for as long as the two of you have and all of a sudden one turns the lights out and leaves. It just doesn't add up sometimes....but it happens all the time. Stay out of her face, cease all contact, don't call her mother. Just be friendly when you must talk through the divorce process. This has to be difficult for her in any case. Link to post Share on other sites
sinner Posted July 20, 2004 Share Posted July 20, 2004 People often change, their needs change, their perception of life changes. What your wife wanted out of life and out of a mate 21 years ago may not be what she wants now. All you can do is respect that and give her space. Being married about 21 years myself, I have to agree with Tony. Your wife is steeling herself for the divorce, and I believe your entreaties could do more harm than good right now. Give her space, allow the process to play out and, who knows, perhaps a year or two from now she might be viewing you, and her marriage, in a whole new light. Hang in there. Link to post Share on other sites
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