huntingirl2010 Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 So I have had a rough family life. And I have lived with my dad my whole life. Well I wanted to be independent and on my own. So when I graduated high school, I moved in with my dads ex since she was more of a mom to me than I had my life.. Then I moved back to my real moms to try having a relationship with her. Then I met my amazing fiance and moved in with him. So ever since I moved out of my dads house a few family members have said that I am not part of their family anymore and I broke my dads heart. I have always gone to visit him and have dinner with him and everything else. I love my family so much, but I don't know how I can have a relationship with them once they say I am disowned and if I was family I wouldn't have done what I did. I feel what I did was a learning experience and I have moved on and started my life. How can I pursue a relationship with family that has said they hate me???? Link to post Share on other sites
pink_sugar Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 Those are trivial reasons for the rest of your family to hate or be upset with you. Is your dad upset with you? Or mainly other relatives? Honestly, it doesn't sound like you have done anything wrong to deserve being disowned. You were young and going through a challenging point of your life...as did I when I graduated high school. It's none of their business whom you live with once you are an adult and you did visit your dad. I could see if you up and left and stopped speaking to him, but that's obviously not the case and IF you did do the above, you probably had good reasoning to. I had a lot of issues with my father when I moved in with my now H at 18 and even bigger issues when I married at 19. What kind of relationship do you have with your father? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author huntingirl2010 Posted September 10, 2012 Author Share Posted September 10, 2012 Those are trivial reasons for the rest of your family to hate or be upset with you. Is your dad upset with you? Or mainly other relatives? Honestly, it doesn't sound like you have done anything wrong to deserve being disowned. You were young and going through a challenging point of your life...as did I when I graduated high school. It's none of their business whom you live with once you are an adult and you did visit your dad. I could see if you up and left and stopped speaking to him, but that's obviously not the case and IF you did do the above, you probably had good reasoning to. I had a lot of issues with my father when I moved in with my now H at 18 and even bigger issues when I married at 19. What kind of relationship do you have with your father? My dad and I get along great. We have been getting along better now than when I was at home. My fiance and I take him fishing all the time. I have dinner with him usually once a week. It is my other relatives that are mad about it. Him and I had issues, but I was willing to look past it once I moved out. And now that I don't live at home, he thinks I will fail at whatever I do, but I figured that it is a dad thing.. I am the baby of the kids. So I can see him being hurt that I left, but I wanted to start my life... Link to post Share on other sites
pink_sugar Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 Ok, that's good you are able to overlook the small stuff and have a positive relationship. I know my dad would have thought it was best for me to stay home and "focus on school" but he was emotionally and physically abusive, that I had to get out. And despite wanting me to focus on school so much, I receive no assistance from him. Anyways, it sounds like your relatives are the ones with the issues. Whatever is going on between you and your dad is your business, they need to butt-out. There isn't any reason for them to be upset with you as you spend a lot of good time with your dad. They are just creating drama. If they can't be supportive of you, who needs them? Just go about your life as usual. Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 You'll learn, as you grow older, that there are just some people who are miserable creatures and will do whatever they can to drag you down to their cesspool. Just ignore them and thank the powers that be that you have a good relationship with the people who WANT to be in your life. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts