eleanorhurting Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 My boyfriend loves cars and I am sure that he will spend a good amount of money on cars when he has the means to do so. However, he is so, so thrifty and cheap with everything else that I would never call him financially irresponsible. Same with me. I love to shop I love clothes and shoes but I try to save in other areas like bringing lunch from home every day instead of buying lunch. People are allowed to have something they like to spend their money on I think. I would really not interfere this early on. Link to post Share on other sites
KungFuJoe Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 I love cars. I don't fix mine up because I only lease my cars (well, my Tahoe is paid for, but that's for the kids) but I definitely don't look at cars as a "bad investment" more like a "I like to drive and I want a nice car". Everyone has their passions and what the hell are you working so hard to make money if you don't get to enjoy it? I have my cars and my whiskey/cigars and my wife has her LV purses and whatever the hell brand name shoes there are. As far moving too soon...NO SUCH THING. My wife and I were official in two weeks, she moved in with me in two months, we were engaged after one year and married after a little over two years. Link to post Share on other sites
eleanorhurting Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 I love cars. I don't fix mine up because I only lease my cars (well, my Tahoe is paid for, but that's for the kids) but I definitely don't look at cars as a "bad investment" more like a "I like to drive and I want a nice car". Everyone has their passions and what the hell are you working so hard to make money if you don't get to enjoy it? I have my cars and my whiskey/cigars and my wife has her LV purses and whatever the hell brand name shoes there are. As far moving too soon...NO SUCH THING. My wife and I were official in two weeks, she moved in with me in two months, we were engaged after one year and married after a little over two years. spoken with wisdom from someone who is married. If you can afford it, get your cars and let your wife have her LVS! Link to post Share on other sites
SeattleBabe Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 Did you read the OP? Did you see the part where she asked if she should just let an adult she has been dating for less than 3 months do what he wants to do with his own money? But didn't she say that she didn't even bother asking about how much money he makes which I thought was a good sign of not being controlling. While I know he deserves to spend his money to whatever he chooses, I think when she asked if she should just let him do what he wants with his OWN money, she was just being concerned and not being a controlling psycho (for me, the term you used was way harsh) since they already had plans together. Link to post Share on other sites
SeattleBabe Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 ^I agree with this. Saying I love you before actually dating and knowing one another really well? Commitment rings before even a year together? I understand the high of a new relationship is really intoxicating, but you guys need to slow up and be more realistic. I think this rushing and clinginess is why you take the car thing so seriously. My point is that all this rushing seems to cause quick burnout from what I have seen. I can only imagine if hes gonna get insecure over something minor himself. How old are you two btw? Doesn't anyone know what WHIRLWIND ROMANCE is? My Dad married my Mom after a month of dating. They have now 5 wonderful children and have been happily married for 35 years! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
D'1ThatGotAway Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 I know someone that loved his car so much that he insulted his wife right before me when he felt she slammed the door shut a little harder and they were newly wed (less than a year). I felt so bad for her. I just feel like quoting and posting this one! "When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife." Heheh! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
KungFuJoe Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 I just feel like quoting and posting this one! "When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife." Heheh! Well....this might sound mean, but just one month into the lease of our current car (this was over 2 years ago) my wife and I went out to a club and she got pretty wasted and ended up puking in the car on the way home. Not gonna lie...I got pretty pissed off at her. Took forever to clean up and get the smell out. I should also preface this by saying that was probably the 13th time she had puked in any given car of mine/ours...so it was more like "not again!!!!". Link to post Share on other sites
Later82012 Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 I just feel like quoting and posting this one! "When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife." Heheh! Thank you for making me laugh. Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 Doesn't anyone know what WHIRLWIND ROMANCE is? My Dad married my Mom after a month of dating. They have now 5 wonderful children and have been happily married for 35 years! yes we are all familiar with "whirlwind romances" and tbh most of those don't work out, that's awesome your parents are an exception but please...they are definitely an exception. Link to post Share on other sites
Author DuchessKaye Posted September 11, 2012 Author Share Posted September 11, 2012 (edited) ^I agree with this. Saying I love you before actually dating and knowing one another really well? Commitment rings before even a year together? I understand the high of a new relationship is really intoxicating, but you guys need to slow up and be more realistic. I think this rushing and clinginess is why you take the car thing so seriously. My point is that all this rushing seems to cause quick burnout from what I have seen. I can only imagine if hes gonna get insecure over something minor himself. How old are you two btw? Admittedly, things have been moving quite fast and I kinda felt odd at the beginning... but we're getting along great so I just thought - oh okay nevermind! Commitment rings to let everyone know that I am his and he is mine, stuff like that, you know. And when my friends commented on this, he only said, why worry much when it's just us being "soulmates". That there's nothing wrong if we both feel like as if we've known each other so very long time ago. Btw, I'm 23 and he's 30. Does it matter though? Edited September 11, 2012 by DuchessKaye Link to post Share on other sites
oaks Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 Thoughts on this? Ask him why he loves a lump of rusting metal that doesn't even give him blow jobs. Link to post Share on other sites
Author DuchessKaye Posted September 11, 2012 Author Share Posted September 11, 2012 Ask him why he loves a lump of rusting metal that doesn't even give him blow jobs. I did ask him already but he just LOLed! And when I said "I'm upset!", he said "Oh sweetie, you're being silly." Link to post Share on other sites
InJest Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 And when my friends commented on this, he only said, why worry much when it's just us being "soulmates". That there's nothing wrong if we both feel like as if we've known each other so very long time ago. Btw, I'm 23 and he's 30. Does it matter though? I cannot wait to read the updates for this one. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
oaks Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 I did ask him already but he just LOLed! And when I said "I'm upset!", he said "Oh sweetie, you're being silly." This makes me sad. I hope you can find someone who appreciates you and who has space in their life for you. Link to post Share on other sites
BehindBlueEyes Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 If he loves his car that much I think he has one of those sexxual car fetishes, what is the name? I love cars too, but to that magnitude...I don't think so. I think he's just being a little punk in a funny way. And yes he may be a little immature dropping 9K on the car right now if he's starting a relationship, wants a house ect ect. I dislike buying a car for like 20,000 and having to drop another 9,000 to make it personal..I'd rather take the 9,000 and build up an old Mustang or something...where I can actually see real results lol.. He's just being immature....don't fret, DK Link to post Share on other sites
Author DuchessKaye Posted September 11, 2012 Author Share Posted September 11, 2012 But anyways, when it comes to other things, he knows how to apologize when he feels I'm starting to get upset. He's always there to console me with hugs and kisses and he's never going to stop until he's sure that I am feeling better. It's just his goddamn car that I can't beat. Arrrgh, why? I hate it when he says his car is sick and that he needs to make her feel better... Oh well, maybe I'll just have to learn to love his car too, and maybe we could call her "OUR BABY"... Haha! Link to post Share on other sites
BehindBlueEyes Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 I think he goes to far if he is actually serious saying his car is sick and needs a hug, but I think he's just being....a boy if anything.... I'm sure he rather have you than a car...and if not....well.....that is just weird(loving a car more than his GF)... I'm all fo rloving cars and being a car enthusiast, painting, hopping up ect ect, but to do things like perhaps, buy a milkshake for the car(lol) that is barf all over the floor sick. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author DuchessKaye Posted September 11, 2012 Author Share Posted September 11, 2012 I think he goes to far if he is actually serious saying his car is sick and needs a hug, but I think he's just being....a boy if anything.... I'm sure he rather have you than a car...and if not....well.....that is just weird(loving a car more than his GF)... I'm all fo rloving cars and being a car enthusiast, painting, hopping up ect ect, but to do things like perhaps, buy a milkshake for the car(lol) that is barf all over the floor sick. God, you're funny. You had me laughing out loud. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BehindBlueEyes Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 What car is it BTW, lol Link to post Share on other sites
threebyfate Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 This thread's confusing. Duchess, thought you were making six figures. If so, why are you waiting for him to jointly buy a place. Buy your own and if he ends up moving in, you can charge him rent. If not, you can't lose since you own the place. As far as his money's concerned, it's his to do with, as he wishes. If he ends up spending all of it on his car, this is his lifestyle choice. If he ends up not having sufficient to pay his existing rent, don't let him move in since he's proven he sucks at being financially responsible. Link to post Share on other sites
Ninjainpajamas Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 What car is it BTW, lol My guess is a 2000 Toyota Echo! Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 I did ask him already but he just LOLed! And when I said "I'm upset!", he said "Oh sweetie, you're being silly." is this like another daddy/babygirl dynamic? Link to post Share on other sites
Author DuchessKaye Posted September 12, 2012 Author Share Posted September 12, 2012 (edited) First, I have a house of my OWN and he has his own apartment that he rents. Second, I am not waiting for him to jointly buy a place with me. We just had a talk of buying or let's call it, investing on/for a place that we can call OUR HOME. He first suggested to get my house upgraded but I declined as I love it as what it is. He then thought of buying another one that's bigger than what I already have. It was his idea since he was already planning about us and I do believe he already sees us as husband and wife in the nearest future. As for his income and mine, I see no problem. I don't really care about the cost of anything as long as they are necessary. Like I said, it's not his money that is my concern, it's to where he would spend it which is the car that I'm beginning to despise because it's making me feel second best. Ok, it could probably be just me being silly but that's how I feel, what can I do... Edited September 12, 2012 by DuchessKaye Link to post Share on other sites
threebyfate Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 Firstly, he hasn't committed to the degree of marriage. Make sure talk and action (proposal) align before getting your mindset headed in that direction. Relax and enjoy your time. Don't create unnecessary drama over an inanimate object. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author DuchessKaye Posted September 12, 2012 Author Share Posted September 12, 2012 Apparently, he did. We are committed to each other. He even mentioned of wanting many kids (16 boys and 8 girls, so that we can have 2 boys for each of our girls, exaggeration lol) that's why he wanted a bigger house. He did introduce me to his parents as "Mom, Dad, your future daughter-in-law". Anyways, I think yeah it would be wise of me if I just don't take things too seriously. If I can't beat his car, I'll just join him in baby-ing it. Link to post Share on other sites
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