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Do you think distance ITSELF can ruin good relationships?

esstea

By esstea,
in Long-Distance Relationships

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William

William

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Never thought we'd have to review a thread in the LDR forum. First time for everything I guess. Back in awhile.

 

Edit 10/1: Stephanie is doing reviews this week and this one is queued. I did a quick scan just now and there is so much personal back and forth and discussions of other posters, as opposed to the topic, that this thread likely won't make it through review as there are so many guideline and policy violations intertwined. That's my opinion. Stephanie might view it differently. Regardless, her decision will be final on the matter, as far as infractions, visibility and re-opening.

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Stephanie

Stephanie

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Never thought we'd have to review a thread in the LDR forum. First time for everything I guess. Back in awhile.

 

Edit 10/1: Stephanie is doing reviews this week and this one is queued. I did a quick scan just now and there is so much personal back and forth and discussions of other posters, as opposed to the topic, that this thread likely won't make it through review as there are so many guideline and policy violations intertwined. That's my opinion. Stephanie might view it differently. Regardless, her decision will be final on the matter, as far as infractions, visibility and re-opening.

 

They made it through with 64 deletes, all off topic and argumentative. I've issued infractions to violators and if they revisit this thread with the same shennanigans, they'll get more. Fair warning. Thread is now re-opened.

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Ani

Ani

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I think it does. For example in my relationship when we are together. There are absolutely no arguments, and we have a good time. We joke around and we just click well together. We also tend to make plans on what we want to do. Like I told her I was thinking of taking a semester over there. Which she agreed on and was ecstatic telling all her friends. We can be together for a few weeks and we don't have a single argument, or we get jealous over simple things like we do when we are away.

 

But once we are back to being distant. This is what happens. She starts telling me things like this..She says she's happy that there is no clinginess and that she has her space. Which I find weird. Simply because when I was over there, I wasn't the one who was forcing myself into her, she would cuddle with me nonstop, or how she wanted me to walk her to class. Another thing was that I asked to be alone for a few minutes so I could walk with her best friends boyfriend and we can get to know each other. Which she agreed but after a while she walked about 10 blocks just to catch up with me so we could walk back. I tried to keep my space, and have some alone time but she wouldn't let me. So when I'm back to where I live. Apparently i'm the clingy one. Which I found rather odd and stupid from her to say.

 

Another thing is that when we are distant. When she gets mad she'll say things like she's happier alone, and that she's not really into us. When i'm over there with her she won't give me my space and we have a blast. Another thing is that those plans we made about me taking a semester over there. Which she was ecstatic about. She says she's not ready for something like that. And i'm that being to straightforward.Another thing that really annoyed me was that apparently her friends think I'm gay. Why do they think that? Because i'm too nice. So she told me to man up.

 

I have no idea what happens in her mind when we're away. All I know is that she changed after she started hanging out with her new friend.

 

I also have a rather off topic question. My Mac won't let me come to this website since apparently there is malware. Anyone else get this warning?

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esstea

esstea

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I think it does. For example in my relationship when we are together. There are absolutely no arguments, and we have a good time. We joke around and we just click well together. We also tend to make plans on what we want to do. Like I told her I was thinking of taking a semester over there. Which she agreed on and was ecstatic telling all her friends. We can be together for a few weeks and we don't have a single argument, or we get jealous over simple things like we do when we are away.

 

But once we are back to being distant. This is what happens. She starts telling me things like this..She says she's happy that there is no clinginess and that she has her space. Which I find weird. Simply because when I was over there, I wasn't the one who was forcing myself into her, she would cuddle with me nonstop, or how she wanted me to walk her to class. Another thing was that I asked to be alone for a few minutes so I could walk with her best friends boyfriend and we can get to know each other. Which she agreed but after a while she walked about 10 blocks just to catch up with me so we could walk back. I tried to keep my space, and have some alone time but she wouldn't let me. So when I'm back to where I live. Apparently i'm the clingy one. Which I found rather odd and stupid from her to say.

 

Another thing is that when we are distant. When she gets mad she'll say things like she's happier alone, and that she's not really into us. When i'm over there with her she won't give me my space and we have a blast. Another thing is that those plans we made about me taking a semester over there. Which she was ecstatic about. She says she's not ready for something like that. And i'm that being to straightforward.Another thing that really annoyed me was that apparently her friends think I'm gay. Why do they think that? Because i'm too nice. So she told me to man up.

 

I have no idea what happens in her mind when we're away. All I know is that she changed after she started hanging out with her new friend.

 

I also have a rather off topic question. My Mac won't let me come to this website since apparently there is malware. Anyone else get this warning?

 

I'm sorry to hear about your situation! Yeah.. It's hard to know what's really happening on the other end of the relationship when communication is off.

And yes I actually got the warning all day yesterday but for some reason it isn't popping up in my Safari anymore. I didn't really worry about it haha.

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