The Contract – A short story

[strongnrelaxed]

Imagine that your father enters into a business contract with a partner – let’s call the partner Joe. Dad puts up all of his net worth and assets and commits all of his time and income to this business venture. All of his income in the partnership would be the property of both partners in the firm, but all of Joe’s income would belong solely to Joe unless he felt generous and wanted to chip in on some bills when he felt like it.

 

Joe has no assets and no real talent for getting new business and growing it, but he was a valuable technical guy and brought some value to the partnership. Most important from your Dad's perspective though, is that Joe is your Dad’s best friend and trust is the most important thing.

 

The only agreement up front would be that they would both promise to work together, stay committed to the business, and not enter into similar business arrangements with other business partners. The other terms and conditions of the contract were to be hidden to your Dad, but well-known to Joe.

 

Besides, this was to be a going concern and your Dad was not worried about the messy law stuff. After all he is a committed business professional – not a lawyer.

 

After some time, he is approached by another businessperson who wants your Dad to work with him. Let’s call him Dave. Dad tells Dave that he is committed to working with Joe and your Dad declines Dave’s generous offer. Dave is a nice guy and could bring Dad much wealth and professional growth. Dad thinks about it and they meet a few times to discuss this. Mostly on the phone.

 

Joe is always insecure in his role in the company and snoops and spies on your Dad constantly. Joe also complains that he does all the technical work and all that stuff about bringing money and customers to the company are not that valuable. Joe thinks your Dad is taking advantage of him.

 

It is a tempting offer by Dave, but Dad is loyal to Joe so he stays and stops communicating with Dave. Dave understands and moves on. He respects your Dad for his loyalty and commitment and hopes that Joe appreciates your Dad.

 

 

Unfortunately, Joe finds out about these meetings and he goes ballistic. His emotions go haywire and results in yelling, drama, threats and even some physical abuse against your Dad by Joe (your Dad is much bigger than Joe, so he feels like it would be unfair and sort of wrong to hit Joe back. So he gets walloped pretty good, but does not fight back). Things calm down and a few days later they agree to get back to business.

 

After a few months your Dad finds out the Joe has a new business partner on the side. Your Dad confronts him about it and Joe says that your Dad deserved it for talking to Dave n the first place. That is what started everything – your Dad was disloyal for even having a conversation. In fact Dave claims that your Dad had many conversations with other business people, but produces no evidence. He “just knows” it. Joe’s friends and family all side with Joe. In fact, Joe threatens to mutilate your Dad's genitals and Joe's family and friends all laugh about it. "ha, ha, that's what he deserves for talking to Dave!" they say.

 

So Dad and Joe decide to split up the business and part ways.

 

They go to court and your Dad loses half of everything to Joe. Not only this, but your Dad is required to pay Joe 30% of his future income for the next 18 years. On top of this, your Dad will have his wages garnished. No negotiating, no appeals- just garnished before he has a chance to see the money. Your Dad has never failed to pay a debt or meet an obligation.

 

Joe periodically goes to court because his expenses are going up, so they unilaterally adjust your Dad’s monthly payment higher once a year. Joe has bills to pay after all.

 

Several years go by and your Dad pulls you aside and says - “Hey I am thinking about repeating the same sort of contract I had with Joe. But this new friend Jim is not like Joe. Not all business partners are like that. Besides, I really admire and respect Jim so I admit that this is an emotional decision.”

 

What would be your advice to your Dad?

Edited September 19, 2012 by strongnrelaxed
Typo

[Axee]

I would ask Dad not to make an 'emotional' decision ... And to weigh out everything about Jim, observer him carefully and check with people who have very good business acumen whether Jim would be a good business partner or not...

[KathyM]

I'd tell him he should consider a sole proprietorship, since his last partnership went so badly for him, and he doesn't seem to do well with partnership arrangements. I'd suggest he subcontract out any work he needs done for his company without taking on any new partners.

 

If you want to equate this with marriage, which it seems this post is about, my advice would be for the guy to remain single and not get married again, since he doesn't seem to be cut out for marriage. He should just date others for companionship and not take on a marriage because he has trouble staying within the parameters of a marriage.

[Axee]

Kathy, Dad hasnt done anything here, its Joe own failings which eventually led to a complete dismissal of the whole thing.. then how can Dad be said to have difficulty in the parameters of marriage, It is a one time mistake of Dad to have choosen Joe in the first place, just that he needs to be sure Jim doesnt turn out to be another Joe

[Got it]

Imagine that your father enters into a business contract with a partner – let’s call the partner Joe. Dad puts up all of his net worth and assets and commits all of his time and income to this business venture. All of his income in the partnership would be the property of both partners in the firm, but all of Joe’s income would belong solely to Joe unless he felt generous and wanted to chip in on some bills when he felt like it.

 

Joe has no assets and no real talent for getting new business and growing it, but he was a valuable technical guy and brought some value to the partnership. Most important from your Dad's perspective though, is that Joe is your Dad’s best friend and trust is the most important thing.

 

The only agreement up front would be that they would both promise to work together, stay committed to the business, and not enter into similar business arrangements with other business partners. The other terms and conditions of the contract were to be hidden to your Dad, but well-known to Joe.

 

Besides, this was to be a going concern and your Dad was not worried about the messy law stuff. After all he is a committed business professional – not a lawyer.

 

After some time, he is approached by another businessperson who wants your Dad to work with him. Let’s call him Dave. Dad tells Dave that he is committed to working with Joe and your Dad declines Dave’s generous offer. Dave is a nice guy and could bring Dad much wealth and professional growth. Dad thinks about it and they meet a few times to discuss this. Mostly on the phone.

 

Joe is always insecure in his role in the company and snoops and spies on your Dad constantly. Joe also complains that he does all the technical work and all that stuff about bringing money and customers to the company are not that valuable. Joe thinks your Dad is taking advantage of him.

 

It is a tempting offer by Dave, but Dad is loyal to Joe so he stays and stops communicating with Dave. Dave understands and moves on. He respects your Dad for his loyalty and commitment and hopes that Joe appreciates your Dad.

 

 

Unfortunately, Joe finds out about these meetings and he goes ballistic. His emotions go haywire and results in yelling, drama, threats and even some physical abuse against your Dad by Joe (your Dad is much bigger than Joe, so he feels like it would be unfair and sort of wrong to hit Joe back. So he gets walloped pretty good, but does not fight back). Things calm down and a few days later they agree to get back to business.

 

After a few months your Dad finds out the Joe has a new business partner on the side. Your Dad confronts him about it and Joe says that your Dad deserved it for talking to Dave n the first place. That is what started everything – your Dad was disloyal for even having a conversation. In fact Dave claims that your Dad had many conversations with other business people, but produces no evidence. He “just knows” it. Joe’s friends and family all side with Joe. In fact, Joe threatens to mutilate your Dad's genitals and Joe's family and friends all laugh about it. "ha, ha, that's what he deserves for talking to Dave!" they say.

 

So Dad and Joe decide to split up the business and part ways.

 

They go to court and your Dad loses half of everything to Joe. Not only this, but your Dad is required to pay Joe 30% of his future income for the next 18 years. On top of this, your Dad will have his wages garnished. No negotiating, no appeals- just garnished before he has a chance to see the money. Your Dad has never failed to pay a debt or meet an obligation.

 

Joe periodically goes to court because his expenses are going up, so they unilaterally adjust your Dad’s monthly payment higher once a year. Joe has bills to pay after all.

 

Several years go by and your Dad pulls you aside and says - “Hey I am thinking about repeating the same sort of contract I had with Joe. But this new friend Jim is not like Joe. Not all business partners are like that. Besides, I really admire and respect Jim so I admit that this is an emotional decision.”

 

What would be your advice to your Dad?

 

Dad was foolish not to have had an agreement spelling out the distribution of funds, wealth, etc and a plan for liquidation of the company.

 

Just like Dad and Mom are foolish not having a prenup in place when they marry.

[Sauron]

Dad should only use sub-contractors frpm now on. If he wants something like a special technical skill he can hire it done. What a great analogy.

[Mme. Chaucer]

Imagine that your father enters into a business contract with a partner – let’s call the partner Joe. Dad puts up all of his net worth and assets and commits all of his time and income to this business venture. All of his income in the partnership would be the property of both partners in the firm, but all of Joe’s income would belong solely to Joe unless he felt generous and wanted to chip in on some bills when he felt like it.

 

Sad. Clearly your father was never cut out to be a businessman and this is doomed. I really don't need to read any further to understand that this poor dad should have just kept his day job and left business ownership to folks with more suitable skill sets. But, read on I shall ...

 

Joe has no assets and no real talent for getting new business and growing it, but he was a valuable technical guy and brought some value to the partnership.

 

He should have contracted wit Joe for specific services. Obviously Joe was not a good choice for full partnership. But we already have learned, from your first paragraph, that "dad" was making a big mistake with this business venture no matter who he had chosen for a partner.

 

 

Most important from your Dad's perspective though, is that Joe is your Dad’s best friend and trust is the most important thing.

 

For friendship, it is. For a business partnership, it is certainly very important, but a lot of other things must be in place as well. For example, the viability of the business plan AND the details of the partnership agreement.

 

 

The only agreement up front would be that they would both promise to work together, stay committed to the business, and not enter into similar business arrangements with other business partners. The other terms and conditions of the contract were to be hidden to your Dad, but well-known to Joe.

 

Haha! This poor dad probably didn't even have the wherewithal to hold a normal 9 - 5 grunt job. You forgot to tell us that he was an intellectually impaired fellow.

 

I can't go on. Sorry.

[strongnrelaxed]

Sad. Clearly your father was never cut out to be a businessman and this is doomed. I really don't need to read any further to understand that this poor dad should have just kept his day job and left business ownership to folks with more suitable skill sets.

 

I can't go on. Sorry.

 

Thank you MME C. You have just proven my point about marriage. Damn, this just gets easier and easier!

 

To the men reading this: Clearly this original post is a thinly veiled analogy to the marriage contract from the perspective of a man. Mme Chaucer has had some harsh language to share against me and other men on this site, which is perfectly ok. You need to read her words carefully and follow along.

 

But here, she actually admits that this deal is very bad for men. Read her quote above and insert "Men" where you see "your father" or "dad"

 

Note very carefully how some women hold men in such bitter contempt for pointing out obvious inequities in our legal system. Note the hateful tone. This is buried within too many women today. Not all, but too many. This woman is a great example of this.

 

Remember this - when you get married, the woman to whom you bind yourself will likely (look at the statistics) become like this. The horrific legal challenges you will face in your divorce will be seen by some women (see above) as YOUR failure. So in a rare ironic twist - I will agree with Mme Chaucer on this one - Keep your day job and do not get married.

[Mme. Chaucer]

Um, no. She didn't say "all dads." She said this dad. Therefore, THIS man. Not all men.

 

If you screwed up your marriage, ya can't blames it on the wimmins.

 

I particularly like the part about the former business partner threatening to mutilate "Dad's" genitals.

[Nyla]

I am new here, but I am already very familiar with the OP's anti-marriage rants.

Because I am aware of his attitude, I knew the thread starter was an analogy to marriage.

 

Human beings have the need to pair bond and seek companionship. No matter what the financial risk might be, people still marry. For example, one could also look at the amount of people who have children, despite the expense and time commitment. The same goes for marriage; it involves risks and sacrifices which can be challenging, but the human need for intimate relationships usually wins out in well adjusted adults. Marriage is a common progression in such relationships.

 

Those who allow anger and bitterness to consume them risk sounding irrational and immature. Anyone is free to be against marriage, but it is in poor taste to constantly seek conflict against people who are married or believe in it. Just as married couples should not force their lifestyle on single people, marrieds should be able to enjoy matrimony in peace.

[strongnrelaxed]

I am new here, but I am already very familiar with the OP's anti-marriage rants.

Because I am aware of his attitude, I knew the thread starter was an analogy to marriage.

 

Human beings have the need to pair bond and seek companionship. No matter what the financial risk might be, people still marry. For example, one could also look at the amount of people who have children, despite the expense and time commitment. The same goes for marriage; it involves risks and sacrifices which can be challenging, but the human need for intimate relationships usually wins out in well adjusted adults. Marriage is a common progression in such relationships.

 

Those who allow anger and bitterness to consume them risk sounding irrational and immature. Anyone is free to be against marriage, but it is in poor taste to constantly seek conflict against people who are married or believe in it. Just as married couples should not force their lifestyle on single people, marrieds should be able to enjoy matrimony in peace.

 

You are completely free to enjoy your matrimony in peace. I am just here to inform young men about the dangers they face if they do get married.

 

What is intriguing to me is why so many women want me to stop saying these things. That should get some people's attention.

 

It reminds me of the Wizard of Oz, when the wizard desperately states "pay no attention to that man behind the curtain".

 

These are the words of a person (wizard or woman) who is desperate that her secret will be found out.

 

It is too late. Look at the marriage stats. I am so very pleased that fewer men are getting married. I am also very pleased that 70 percent of divorces are initiated by women - and an untold majority are initiated by women. These statistics are no longer hidden to us.

 

So say what you will Nyla. You can join the chorus. I encourage you to continue to post as you have. This is so important. Whether you realize it or not, it is YOUR comments that have the bigger impact. My postings are honest and heartfelt. I try to be as factual as possible - although I admit that I have not always been perfect in this sense.

 

Welcome to LS. I welcome your support and assistance in my quest to cut down on the foolishness that is modern marriage.

 

Thanks for the assist!

[CarboniteCammy]

TBH, it doesn't sound like your dad picked a very good business partner.

 

He should really figure out where he sees his business in five, ten years and then find a person who is on board with that plan before he enters into another partnership.

[Mme. Chaucer]

I particularly like the part about the former business partner threatening to mutilate "Dad's" genitals.

 

It's quite homoerotic.