Long Distance Relationship Don't Know If Its Gonna Work! HELP

[babyphatangel21]

I Need Help Because I Don't Know If It Is Going To Work Or Not

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I really really like this kid i met online and i don't know if our relationship is going to work out.

 

Well it started as we were talking as just friends and everything and we were talking for about a month then one day he said he really really liked me and that he wanted to go out with me and at the time i really really liked him too but he lives in georgia and i live in new york and i don't know how im going to see him and i don't know if it is going to work or not so i need help or advice from someone on what i should do i really want to stay with him cause i like him alot but i don't know what to do now.... PLEASE HELP!

[dyermaker]

LDR : I'm doing it. It's hard. Sometimes it hurts. Often it feels great. Odds are against us.

 

1. Maintain Perspective.

 

Keep it a learning experience. Realize that there's a possibility, no matter how in love you are, that things won't work out. This doesn't mean de-invest yourself from the relationship, it means that you know nobody's perfect, and s%#* happens. If things work out, you'll know more about each other and yourself to live a healthy life together. If things don't work out, instead of being an emotional wreck who'd rather kill herself than move on, you'll have learned important stuff from THIS relationship to apply to your NEXT one--Including how to handle a separation.

 

2. Communicate Honestly.

 

You know how you can look into someone's eyes, and just KNOW something's wrong? Well, if he's in Georgia, you can't do that. And neither can he. Ergo, you have to communicate, ALL the time. If something's wrong, you need to talk about it until it's right. If something's wrong with him, he has to do the same. It sounds so easy, but you have no idea how hard it is. A lot of people, when communicating, feel vulnerable, and so they don't communicate to maintain "the upper hand". That's destructive in any relationship, but especially when you're apart. 99% of any issue in any relationship is from a lack of communication.

 

3. Commit Fully.

 

You can't hold back, you have to make yourself vulnerable, which could entail heart break. Learn from the vulnerableness, and, if neccessary, learn from the heartbreak. You can't expect someone to commit to you unless you commit to them.

 

4. Know Everything

 

While it may be fun and exciting to be with "a challenge", that's not what a good relationship is made of. There's no mystery in true love. Talk often and talk freely. This doesn't mean harrass them, it just means know the person you're committing to very well.

 

5. Evaluate Often

 

Be honest with yourself. If you don't think it's going to work out, don't string it along or wait for him to say something.

 

Good luck.

[moimeme]

Hey, D'yer - are you positive you're not sporting a long white beard and living atop a Nepalese peak?

[dyermaker]

Moi - Virgos are clean-shaven.

 

(Edit: Way to go with the proper apostrophe, I'm impressed)

[moimeme]

All mine weren't