Mr Reptile Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 Hi everyone. I just came home from the gym and I didn't even workout, I just walked around for 10 min wondering "What am I doing here?" It's the 2nd time this happen in a week. And I begin to think I know why... I miss my gympartner, in this case, my ex girlfriend. We motivated eachother, worked out together and watched motivationmovies etc etc. Even if we didn't have the same goal we inspired eachother to keep going. I still go to the same gym, but it's the best one I know and I got like 4-5 months left to go there. She ended it 4 months ago, I've been in NC for atleast 3 months. I don't miss her as my girlfriend, I miss her as my gympartner. I got 2 friends who workout at home, but they don't wanna go to the gym. I have to go alone all the time, and I'm thinking of quit working out. I'm not motivated anymore, I've done it for years but now I never want to. She has another guy now, I don't want to destroy it for them but I miss to workout with her sooo much I don't think she is working at the gym anymore, she told me that when it ended. But what should I do? I can't workout without her anymore, I'm not motivated. Is there any way I can get motivated again? Does anyone have this experience to? Link to post Share on other sites
Titanwolf Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 (edited) Why are you so focused on everyone else BUT yourself?. When you train, you do it for yourself, because only you will reap the mental and physical rewards from pushing your body. You need to get yourself a decent music player, load it up with inspiring, heart pumping songs and get your ass to a gym. You will look back a year from now and think "If only I had continued training back then, my body would have been amazing by now". Is that what you want?. I know break-ups are hard, blah blah blah and all that emotional crap but in the end, you're only hurting yourself in the long run. Find a picture of your ideal body, save it and make it your background. Now every time you log in, BOOM inspiration all up in "yuh" face (Pardon my French). I had a similar scenario like that a while back. I had a gym partner who didn't want to train, I had to do my own thing. I wasn't going to allow anything to stand in the way of my goal and now 6 years on, he is still very rounded (to put it nicely) and I have shaped up into a very lean, strong young man (I was 15 when we trained together). Train and reap the rewards for yourself. If there's one thing a man should have, it's perseverance. Keep training! Ps- It's similar, because it was bromance >:'( Edited September 20, 2012 by Titanwolf Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 Hi everyone. I just came home from the gym and I didn't even workout, I just walked around for 10 min wondering "What am I doing here?" It's the 2nd time this happen in a week. And I begin to think I know why... I miss my gympartner, in this case, my ex girlfriend. We motivated eachother, worked out together and watched motivationmovies etc etc. Even if we didn't have the same goal we inspired eachother to keep going. I still go to the same gym, but it's the best one I know and I got like 4-5 months left to go there. She ended it 4 months ago, I've been in NC for atleast 3 months. I don't miss her as my girlfriend, I miss her as my gympartner. I got 2 friends who workout at home, but they don't wanna go to the gym. I have to go alone all the time, and I'm thinking of quit working out. I'm not motivated anymore, I've done it for years but now I never want to. She has another guy now, I don't want to destroy it for them but I miss to workout with her sooo much I don't think she is working at the gym anymore, she told me that when it ended. But what should I do? I can't workout without her anymore, I'm not motivated. Is there any way I can get motivated again? Does anyone have this experience to? the best thing for you to do is workout.....you don't need someone to motivate you from your past you need to project your motivation to a future goal that is brighter than just being motivated to work out.....it has to incorporate something that isnt only for self motivation....to better yourself.....set your self mini goals daily ones......i walk and i walk by myself i have invited others no takers think my friend might be joining me a couple of days a week....I am still motivated to walk even though I am injured with two different types o f leg injury i still try.....slower though......you cant depend on anybody to motivate you you have to find it in yourself and try to project your motivation to you having a positive head space.....the more you work out the easier it will be for you to keep going and then you wont need to rely on anyone else....i have always been able to self motivate......get spiritual.....trust me it works......pray for strength......become an all rounder......and if you truly struggle try a personal trainer gonna cost you but to get you to the self motivating part....let go of your ex and motivate yourself firstly to move on..she isnt goign to be your partner in anything...then do the fitness thing....good luck happy trails.....deb Link to post Share on other sites
tman666 Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 When it comes to training motivation and direction, I think that good training partners are great and can add a lot to your progress and overall enjoyment. That said, there absolutely HAS to be some level of self sufficiency when it comes to training. Training partners will come and go, but if you have big goals, you have to plan for long term consistency on your part, independent of other circumstances. I think the first step here is to do some soul searching on why you train in the first place and what kind of benchmarks you'd like to achieve. It's easy to say that you want to be big and jacked and strong, but it's an entirely different thing to make the decision to pursue that goal for the years (or decades) it can take to reach them. This long term consistency and drive is what eventually separates out the good and great lifters from your typical gym rat. Let me clarify: there is nothing wrong with being and "average gym rat". Most people go to gym to simply feel better and look better. They are content with feeling good and looking better than they would sitting around and playing WoW all day. Some go to socialize. Some go for stress relief. All of these things are OK, but they don't require the level of dedication and commitment that it takes to truly stand out. So again, you must first decide what you're going for. If you simply like lifting heavy things, getting a good pump, and being able to steal glances at the hotties in their tight yoga pants, then more power to you. If you want to squat and deadlift 500 lbs, the adjust your outlook accordingly. Basically, decide what you want to do and then tailor your training around that. Have a reason to do what you do. Link to post Share on other sites
tman666 Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 Read this: Habits of Strong Lifters - JimWendler.com Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mr Reptile Posted September 21, 2012 Author Share Posted September 21, 2012 This helped alot! I tried to workout today and it was one of my best. I don't need anyoneelse to be motivated, however sometimes it feels like that because it's better. But I don't NEED it. As Titanwolf said I will regret it in a year, that's for sure. If I know myself right I will be back here, and I hope you will help me then. But for now I got the motivation back! Thank you all for your help, it really worked and you gave me much to think about! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MonsterMash Posted September 21, 2012 Share Posted September 21, 2012 Its weird with me. If I'm feeling great when I get to the gym, I usally don't have a great workout. But If I'm feeling like crap and don't want to be there, I blow it up. Either way....throw on some angry German music and go to town. I prefer Rammstein. Link to post Share on other sites
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