mortensorchid Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 About 8 months ago, my last LTR came to an end rather unexpectedly. I saw him a few more times after that, then about a month or two ago he sent me a text saying we had to talk. I called him and he said he had to tell me that he is no longer single. He didn't want me to find out by reading the Facebook news feed. I said (what else could I say?) but "Godspeed" and that was that. I posted here before how I choose to unfriend him the other week. I wrote him an email explaining myself, didn't want to leave him hanging as to why. I told him it was just too painful to see all the lovey dovey posts from him and the new gf saying "I love you" and "I'm with you on this roller coaster ride of life with you, I love you so much!". He never said it to me, and for the most part I was there for the roller coaster as well. He said he broke it off with me because every woman he's ever been with has broken it off because of his bad behavior and he wasn't going to let that happen again. That's a real loser thing to say, isn't it? Even though he's an Alpha Male aka Bad Boy (which I found out too late). He wrote back and said if that is my choice than he accepts it. If I ever want to talk again to contact him again. Well today, I happened to check. I was Facebook friends with his sister and his mom, and they both unfriended me. I guess that whole family is a bunch of losers, aren't they? Has anyone ever experienced this? I'm speechless on this. Link to post Share on other sites
suladas Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 Why should you still be friends with them? I don't see any reason why you wouldn't delete them, or they wouldn't delete you? I can see them keeping you as long as you are friends with your ex still, but once that's cut you have no ties left to them. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
CptObvious Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 lol you actually care about those pixels? OP clearly gotten to. Link to post Share on other sites
Sanman Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 I don't understand why that is so unexpected. They are his family and if you are choosing to cut ties with him, then they are likely do things like that. Hell, my friends and I often unfriend each others ex-gfs so they cannot cyberstalk us via our friends. That is life, let it go. Link to post Share on other sites
Dreamless Sleep Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 In an effort to develop a more sane psyche, I eliminated my ex's photos and feed and made her an 'aquaintance' to only have access to the kids pix. As I was changing other out-laws access I discovered that a few had unfriended me. No biggie. My siblings have also unfriended her. They found it weird that she still liked posts and commented on their walls. Link to post Share on other sites
lilyblue Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 My exes family didn't unfriend me, although I kept waiting for them to. I think it's pretty natural that they would. Instead, a year after we broke up they started reaching out to me. I think no matter what goes on, it feels a little strange. Link to post Share on other sites
MuscleCarFan Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 Why should you still be friends with them? I don't see any reason why you wouldn't delete them, or they wouldn't delete you? I can see them keeping you as long as you are friends with your ex still, but once that's cut you have no ties left to them. I totally agree with this. Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 1- why are you "speechless" about that? were you and his family CURRENTLY still friends irl? 2- why didn't you delete him and his family when you broke up? 3- why would you ever feel the need to explain why you are defriending an ex who has a new girlfriend? 4- do you seek out drama? 5- why would you expect his family to keep you as a "friend" when you clearly are not actually friends? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Mme. Chaucer Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 It's appropriate that they are not your "friends" on facebook. You went out with that guy for SIX MONTHS … why you were even friends with his family on FB is not clear to me. And you've been broken up for SIX MONTHS now. So let it go already. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 The day my ex and me broke up, I unfriended him, his family and his closest friends. I also asked my family to do the same. Why would I stay friends with those people? I did send everyone a message saying that I am unfriending them because mine and ex's relationship ended and it's better for everyone if we healed and moved on as quickly as possible. I wished them all the best. Most of them responded that they understood and wished me well too. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
tigressA Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 When I split with my ex I unfriended him and all his friends, and I asked my family (dad, dad's girlfriend, brother) to unfriend him as well considering all that had happened. I don't know if they did or not. You've been broken up for longer than you even were together. You should quit seeking out things to get unreasonably worked up over; you'll have something positive to post here eventually if you do. Link to post Share on other sites
thatone Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 mortensorchid, you've told us that you are in your late 30s, if i remember correctly? that being the case, you surely remember the time before facebook in which you weren't considered close to people that you don't at least talk to on the phone because...there was no facebook! don't buy into imaginary digital attention or lack thereof. it's BS. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mrlonelyone Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 The psychodynamics of this are kinda strange. In one case I was blocked by an Ex and her sister in law but not her brother. They blocked everyone in my family including my legally blind father who can't use a computer by himself,...but not my mother. What does it mean? They know that to my culture mothers are of supreme importance and any cordial relationship in the future depends on not crossing them? Hmmm. I have a long lost brother. My family found him on FB. We all messaged him and tried to reach out, he blocked us all/deleted his FB. WTH? I have a sister who lives around the corner. I would post things about genealogy. She blocked me because the idea of researching great great great ancestors disturbs her.... she still comes around and is totally cool. But isn't FB the end all be all of interpersonal relationships? Mortensorchid, my point in writing all that is that FB ultimately does not matter. What matters is how someone acts when you see them IRL. This persons family may not bear any actual ill will towards you. They probably stayed FB friends with you so long because they liked allot about you. Just don't worry about it. Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 I've had cousins, friends and girl's block me on Facebook. You know what all of them have in common? They're insecure and childish. If I don't need you in IRL, then fine with me on Facebook, too. Link to post Share on other sites
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