Are My Parents Right or Wrong?

[radishearrings]

Hello everyone, I'm new here and I have quite a stressful stituation, so please bear with me.

 

I am currently a junior in college studying to go to medical school, and I'm dating my boyfriend of 1.5 years, who goes to the same school with me and is studying to be a photographer. He and I are 2 years apart, with him being older than me, and we also both dorm, which is how we met each other.

 

After dating my boyfriend for this long I feel like he is perfect for me in everyway: he is supportive, loving, kind to me and others, and is always there for me when I need him--basically the best friend anyone could ask for. He also treats me with respect and is even willing to wait until marriage to have sex with me.

 

The problem is that since the beginning my parents have resented the idea of me dating him. Since he is aspiring to be a fashion photographer, my parents hate the idea that he wil be photographing beautiful women as his career because they think that one day he will cheat on me. They also feel that since I want to be a doctor, he will rely on me financially (they are the type of parents that believe that husbands should make more than their wives). They feel he is a distraction to me at school, but I have been earning pretty much straight A's since freshman year. Because of their views, they have tried to control my life by controlling me financially--ie, threatening to not pay for my college and transferring me to elsewhere.

 

I have already tried liying to them, and honestly I am not proud of it. When they found out that we never broke up, they have pretty much given up trying to control me. Now at this point they are very deeply disappointed in me and keep trying to convince me to break up with him.

 

My problem with this issue is that my parents don't even know him. They have met him only twice while dropping me off/picking me up from somewhere and have never had conversation with him. They are judging him based on his career choice and this makes me upset. My boyfriend and I have already talked to each other about whether or not I am alright with him photographing girls (which I am, and I am also fine with him watching porn and such). He always asks me for my permission to take pictures of them and even lets me watch him do it, so I have no trust issues with him. I also don't mind if he makes less than I do--I don't need to rely on him financially.

 

I understand that my parents are looking out for me and don't want me to be taken advantage of. I keep trying to explain to them that we are serious about each other (not that we want to get married soon--we will both get out careers before we get married) and that I want them to give him a chance. My boyfriend even talked to them over the phone once to convince them to not be worried, but that didn't even work, and my parents refuse to meet/speak to him at all.

 

All I just want to know is this: Are my parents right or wrong for treating us this way? Yes, we are both very young people, and the future is never certain. They don't understand how much we mean to each other, and even if we are young, he is someone that I feel like I would take a chance and want to spend the future with. But am I a bad daughter for going against their wishes? What should I do?

 

I apologize for the length, but thanks in advance for your opinions and advice