Svet74 Posted October 5, 2012 Share Posted October 5, 2012 I dont know why all of you are still replying to her post. Obviously this girl is seeking attention because her own ex boyfriend wont give her any. And no heartbreak is not like cancer. if a person could choose to heal cancer they would! You can heal your heart, thats a choice you dummy! Link to post Share on other sites
lovejoy41 Posted October 5, 2012 Share Posted October 5, 2012 @Svet, Yeah, I think you are doing great! The thing is not going back. You're showing him that you don't need him nor will you be disrespected. Sounds like our exes are very similar. The difference is that my ex is still with this girl. They live together in his house. He met her like 6 mos after me or at least that's what he told me. So, you know that I have nothing at all to say to him. He would do what your ex did sometimes too. We would fall out & when he did come back he didn't apologize or explain his disappearance. If I brought it up to discuss he would change the subject or manipulate me into moving past it. So, I'm feeling like why are you contacting me when you have girlfriend? Then he was so cocky and proud of the fact that knew I about her when I confronted him. You can read my post under 5 YRS/FWB Sucks" for the details. You might want to screen your calls going forward. If it's a number that you don't know, his number, or a restricted number don't answer. They can leave a voicemail if it's not him& if it is he can do the same. One of my friends told me now that he's texted twice, to expect him to call after a while. I hope that the fool doesn't! So, you keep doing NC. You are doing really good. It's only been 3 weeks though so don't fold. At 3 weeks, I was a mess. I didn't contact him but I cried a lot! So, for you to be sticking to NC is great! You go girl! It's been 3 mos since I've seen the fool and it will be 3 mos of no contact for me on the 26th of this month. @younginlove Wow, just wow. I am going to pray for you girl. I won't trash you but pray for you. That man is never going to respect you and that temporary pleasure you're getting is only going to bring you more hurt and hell. I know because of the many times that I folded in the past. That's why I can't judge you. It's not going to get better trust me. Eventually like I did though, you will get tired of him treating you like a piece of meat. You're going to begin wanting substance with that penis and he won't give it to you. Then you will be ready to see it for what it is, grieve the loss, accept it, and then move on. I pray that you are able to hold it together when he decides that he's done with you again. smh So so sad. Wow... Link to post Share on other sites
lovejoy41 Posted October 5, 2012 Share Posted October 5, 2012 (edited) Also I feel terrible that everyone on Loveshack is now the enemy. That's what makes these type of relationships so toxic. Once these people get in your head, you become co-dependent and once that happens it's hard to see anything. The sex clouds your judgement. As soon as I walked away my head became clear because the sex was over. After that more things became clear & that kept me on the no contact train. These people like this guy are like drugs and you're the addict. Interventions, tough love, none of that will work. The addict has to be tired and want to make a change for their self. He's either gonna use her until he finds another toy, drive her insane(some people have even thought about suicide when dealing with this type of person), or he'll do something that hurts her to her soul so much that she will muster up some strength and leave for good. She will figure that the pain of letting him go is far better than staying in it. And this jerk will get the message and go on to another woman who doesn't give a **** about herself. Everyday I'm on my knees thanking God that it didn't go this far with me. I had to reach deep down into myself to find the courage to go but once I did it, there was No going back & I still won't. You will be amazed at how good you feel when you leave them alone. The fear of the toxic relationship ending can hold you hostage as well but you have to push through it and know you deserve better. I feel free; better than I've ever felt after 5 years with my ex. He was toxic as hell to me & I yearned it for 5 years!!! smh Ugh! It's like you lose yourself in them. Like she says in the book they are compared to vampires. They suck the life out of you. However, you can only be their victim if you allow it. You have to push through that thing. Like a drug addict, walking away or getting dumped by them is like checking into rehab. Once you're there the tears, fears, and heartbreak are like withdrawal & you fight to not crave the drug or you quit rehab and relapse. If you're lucky enough to stay in & get past all of that stuff, you complete rehab, stay away from the drug(s) stay clean, stay sober, and live a blessed brand new life. Edited October 5, 2012 by lovejoy41 Link to post Share on other sites
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