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It's been really hard these past 14 months


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It's been a real struggle to hold on to my sobriety. (I posted my breakup story in Breaks and Breaking Up as well as Coping)

 

Since he's been gone, it's been really hard. I was in an abusive home, and have been out on my own since I was 14 because of it. I fell into an older crowd and ended up drinking heavily and dabbling in drugs. As time went on, I fell deeper into darkness, until I had an accidental overdose and almost died. At that point, I decided I was going to try and get my **** together.

 

At an NA meeting in January 2010, I met my soul mate. He was perfect. We hit it off immediately, and everything was perfect. He made me feel safe and loved, like a princess. Then, in late July 2011, he left me for another woman.

[FONT=Calibri][sIZE=3]Since then, I've been trying my hardest not to fall back into old ways, but it's really hard. I fell off the wagon with alcohol and have been drinking regularly, but it isn't numbing enough anymore.

 

I feel so pathetic. :(

Edited by SoulOnFire
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... I believe it must be hard for you... I can give advice what works for me,

I stopped going out with the drinking friends I use to have, I made new friends and instead of going out to drink Alcohol , we will go out for dinner and coffee.. or made food at each other's appartments... First you have to change your influences then change your habits....

 

I don't know if that will help you, but to have a vision and a dream to help others, usually keeps me out of trouble.....

 

 

:)

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I haven't touched alcohol in one year today actually. When my ex dumped me, my first instinct was to go and get a few bottles of wine. But I had to keep reminding myself that I quit abusing alcohol for ME. It's a kind thing I did for myself. Nobody will ever have enough control and power over me to make me break my promise to myself to abstain. You know it's going to make your situation worse, so please choose not to do it.

 

Abusing is familiar. It's how we used to cope. A comfortable rut that only serves to destroy us physically, mentally, financially and spiritually. Stop the drinking today and vow that you will be kind with yourself, nurture yourself through the pain of the breakup. You've come so far, don't let his memory ruin you.

Edited by River Rain
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It's been a real struggle to hold on to my sobriety. (I posted my breakup story in Breaks and Breaking Up as well as Coping)

 

Since he's been gone, it's been really hard. I was in an abusive home, and have been out on my own since I was 14 because of it. I fell into an older crowd and ended up drinking heavily and dabbling in drugs. As time went on, I fell deeper into darkness, until I had an accidental overdose and almost died. At that point, I decided I was going to try and get my **** together.

 

At an NA meeting in January 2010, I met my soul mate. He was perfect. We hit it off immediately, and everything was perfect. He made me feel safe and loved, like a princess. Then, in late July 2011, he left me for another woman.

[FONT=Calibri][sIZE=3]Since then, I've been trying my hardest not to fall back into old ways, but it's really hard. I fell off the wagon with alcohol and have been drinking regularly, but it isn't numbing enough anymore.

 

I feel so pathetic. :(

 

It isn't numbing anymore, because that is what it does. You keep needing more and more. Alcohol is a drug.

 

Can you go back to NA? Have you worked the steps?

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