Can't tell if I'm doomed to unrequited love

[ladylincoln]

I've got the classic "does he like me or not" problem and would love some feedback.

 

I am a female law student and he is in two of my classes this year. We're both in our early twenties. We were in the same section during our first year of law school, but we were just acquaintances then, nothing more. He's a nice mix of sweet-tempered, generous friendliness, hard-working student, and athletic jock. It's weird because he has some of the traits of a bro/frat boy (iron liver, college athlete, etc) but he's also respectful, mature and kind of quiet and thoughtful. Definitely not a player. I am interested in him, but I haven't shown it. In the beginning of this semester, we would say hi in class and ask each other for notes whenever one of us missed class. This is pretty normal at my school btw - we aren't nastily competitive like many other law schools and strangers often share notes, so trading class notes is not a big deal.

 

I've been missing class quite a bit, so I've taken kind of spotty notes that are nowhere near as good as his. Yet he asked me if I wanted to work with him on a class project. I said sure, and he was happy to let me choose the topic. Then he asked me if I wanted to study together for a midterm, and I agreed, but in my head I was like, "lolwut?" Hasn't he read my terrible notes? And I'm pretty sure he has caught me shopping online in class. Here's the thing: I'm actually a good student, but I'm kind of flippant in person and he has no idea of whether I have good grades or not, but judging by my behavior this year, anyone would think I'm a ditz. He's a smart boy, so why is he asking me to study with him? And usually people try to get a group together, or they just study with their friends from 1L (first year of law school), but he kind of made it clear that it would just be the two of us. (I suggested a friend would like to join us and he was like, "Sure," in a lukewarm way, but in the end she never turned up and he didn't notice.)

 

So he reserves a study room for us, and by this point I definitely have hopes that this whole thing was just an excuse to talk to me - but although he greets me in his usual lovely way, he makes sure we get right down to business. He's pretty intense about the work, but we periodically take short breaks where we talk about music and eat snacks and get to know each other, like where each of us went to college, where we're from, etc. And when we leave the room at the end of the study session, he opens the door for me. This isn't the South or the Midwest, so little gestures like that are noticeable.

 

In my experience, and from what I know of people at this law school, guys don't invite you to cozy twosome study sessions or ask you (and nobody else but you) to work with them on class projects unless they're interested in some way. I have never had a guy invite me to study with him, it's much more usual that I see a friend in the library, he says hi, and I end up sitting at his table. And most people are firm friends with the people they bonded with in the first year of law school - after that first year, overtures of friendship like this are very rare. But the object of my affection doesn't flirt with me. He hasn't asked me out socially, just for stuff like this. And although we're in two classes together, he's only asked me to study with him for one of those classes - I don't know if that means anything or not. I can't be the only person he knows in that class, he's pretty sociable.

 

And this would be easier to understand if he was shy and couldn't talk to me, but he can talk to me. I'm afraid he only wants to be friends, but I have a total crush on him because he's got such a nice personality and sometimes I think I can't read him at all! Any help, advice or suggestions would be great. Thanks!

 

Even if you have a tough time reading this situation, any advice you can tell me from personal experience about guys like this would be awesome too.

[ladylincoln]

really, nobody?

[heather_1]

From a guy's perspective I think he likes you. Guys can come accross confident but still not be able to show their feelings for you. He wanted to spend time alone with you which is a big hint. Why don't you try flirting a bit with him. If he plays back then you know that there is some interest on his part.

[Eddie Edirol]

I dont think he likes you, otherwise he would have tried to make more reasons to hang with you. Or, he is too shy to make a move. So its your turn to make the chance and risk the rejection. If he is a decnt guy, he wont make the rejection that hard on you. Just do it assuming he doesnt like you, so you dont have to be dissappointed if he really doesnt. Dont overthink it, just try it and if it doesnt work, then oh well.