First Love

[miley]

Really need advice....i dated my first love for 2 yrs in college. He ended breaking up with me for another girl and broke my heart. I could tell he had regrets after, but he was too late. I moved on with another man, who today is my husband (17 yrs of marriage). He ended up marrying that girl he broke my heart for, but they later divorced. He is currently married to wife #2.

Anyway, thru social media we reconnected 20 yrs later and started talking. We were emailing each other and he mentioned he was coming into town for business and asked if I wanted to get a drink. I did meet him and we hung out for a few hours talking and laughing and we went our separate ways. We still continued to email/text and once in a while talk on the phone (we also have a business connection). This went on for a year and suddenly he stopped. He won't respond to any of my emails (work or personal) or texts. I got used to talking with him and miss the discussions. I don't know why he won't talk with me anymore. It drives me crazy. We never told our spouses we met one night, but it was innocent. I do have to say, talking with him really has stirred up old feelings that I thought were gone, but now their back. I still or once again feel for him and it freaks me out. I love my hubby v much & wouldn't cheat, but I think I have feelings for the other guy too. Should I just let it go or try to find out why he won't respond to me? It really consumes my thoughts a lot. Thankfully we live in different states. Wow, I never thought I would react this way to him 20 yrs later. I feel like I am trying to get over him again. I thought we could be friends, but maybe not. He did tell me he thought about me over the yrs. First loves really are powerful...thanks for listening and any advice.

[miley]

Just to clarify, I did tell my husband that I reconnected with my ex, but he doesn't know we talked as much as we did. They knew each other in college and did not like each other then because of me. As far as a full blown affair.....I wouldn't go there. I think about my ex a lot, but could not do that to my husband.

 

You are right, I need to focus on what my deal is and if something is lacking in my life. I do get frustrated with my husband, but every couple has ups and downs. My ex reminds me of my younger more carefree days. Maybe its midlife crises.. I don't know, but I do know I miss our talks. It makes me happy to talk with him. It reminds me of a time that was happy and fun and the great part of our relationship.