At what cost, to be together?

[Million.to.1]

I think you both should sit down and really talk about the possibilities. Maybe try visiting each other a couple weeks first, just to try it out.

 

You mentioned he can't afford to pay to visit, there must be some way to save up right? If he can't make the effort to save up to pay the tickets, he would never leave his country to be with you.

 

Good luck!!

 

 

I did offer to pay for his flight, but he is not accepting it.

He will be saving plenty before he comes, and so will I.

 

I made the offer to prove my good intentions towards him and show my support and appreciation for the massive sacrifices he is making - giving up his family, his friends, his music/work networks all the music gear he will have to sell or put into storage or pay thousands to maybe move here eventually, just so he can to come and be with me.

 

 

A couple of grand in money (which i will happily contribute whether in flights, or house rental expenses for us when he gets here or whatever) is really nothing in comparison to what it is costing him in the grand scheme of things.

 

I appreciate your concern, but you clearly assign value to things in life in a very different way than I do.

[Els]

I think it's very fair of you to offer to finance his move, in lieu of the fact that he is the one moving. When I moved to be with the bf, he financed my entire stay for as long as was needed. If he had expected me to both move to be with him and pay my own way, I would probably have reconsidered, because it would have shown ambivalence and unwillingness to sacrifice to be together, on his behalf.