kk555 Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 Hi, I have been thinking about divorcing my husband for many years now. Our marriage has been unworkable for so many reasons and I have really tried everything to get things on track and develop a strong, healthy marriage but to no avail. Finally I had enough and told my husband I wanted a divorce. When he responded with, "It's a bit sad, but not the end of the world." I was pretty upset because I had been struggling with this for such a long time. At the moment everything is really good. We are getting along better than ever and seem to be managing the change quite well. We are still sleeping in the same bed (but not with each other)and will continue to do so until we settle our affairs over the coming months. I am feeling pretty positive about the future despite the long hard road we still have to walk and am really excited about my life. I am seeing a therapist, which is helping immensely and I am keeping my fingers crossed that my ex and I can get through this without destroying each other. We haven't yet told our kids or most of our friends but that will come. I feel so fortunate, still a bit sad, but really fortunate too. Anyone out there going through/been through an amicable/civilised divorce have any tips? Cheers Link to post Share on other sites
riverratt Posted October 7, 2012 Share Posted October 7, 2012 It can be done without any confrontation if both of you go into it with the right attitude. My wife and I are not arguing over anything. We are using one lawyer to write up the petition. Do everything possible so neither one of you gets destroyed financially. It will only hurt the kids in the future. I have no hard feelings towards her or does she towards me. We did nothing to each other, over the years, to warrant hard feelings. We just didn't work on it. We have discussed everything down to punishments of our son. If I punish him for something the punishment carries over to her house and from hers to mine. We are going to hold it from becoming final until after the first of the year for tax purposes. I can be done!! Link to post Share on other sites
StartingOver4 Posted October 8, 2012 Share Posted October 8, 2012 Hi there. I was in your situation up until a month ago. I had told my husband I was leaving in July, so we had 2 months of an "in-house separation". I will say that things changed a lot since moving. My husband now only speaks to me when absolutely necessary and pretty much won't discuss what went wrong in our marriage. He was against the separation, but now that I've left he's just shut down. And, I will say that living with him was very different from now, even though we both knew I was leaving. Once the front door of my new place closed and I was alone, I felt a completely unexpected emotion - grief. Not over losing him, but over losing the happiness and future dreams we once shared. I've spent the past month crying my eyes out over everything, even though I know it's for the best. Just make sure this is really what you want. Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted October 8, 2012 Share Posted October 8, 2012 My suggestion is don't date anyone until your divorce is FINAL. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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