my bf hates cats!

[amaysngrace]

Allergies are the worst. I don't blame him. I don't like trees.

[veggirl]

I think it's quite funny (in a disturbing way) how many women suddenly become detectives (He's lying! Have you actually seen this so-called allergy?) and doctors (He can just take a pill! He needs to get shots!) when confronted with a common medical condition.

 

I'm allergic to cats. Allergies are real and it ain't that easy to treat them. Jes sayin'.

 

Well if he's so super allergic how has he come over daily for 4 months? That doesn't add up.

[alexa137]

yea he gets really watery eyes and red and itchy ears and sniffies etc....

i try to vaccuum 2 or 3 times a week and clean off the couch but it doesnt help

cant have dogs! plus i dont pick up poop! litter box is clean! she mostly sleeps in a box

he deals with it but i guess hes talkign about the future like if we move in together

[CarrieT]

yea he gets really watery eyes and red and itchy ears and sniffies etc....

Is he taking any over-the-counter medication to help with the allergies? There are also some kick-ass prescriptions ones available as well as shots. Honestly, his allergies don't sound THAT BAD compared to some friends of mine whose lungs start to shut down when they get near cats. Sniffles and watery eyes can be easily dealt with = better living through chemistry.

 

Your future need not be cat-free, if he is willing.

[threebyfate]

yea he gets really watery eyes and red and itchy ears and sniffies etc....

i try to vaccuum 2 or 3 times a week and clean off the couch but it doesnt help

cant have dogs! plus i dont pick up poop! litter box is clean! she mostly sleeps in a box

he deals with it but i guess hes talkign about the future like if we move in together

So what do you want to do? It's really your choice, one you'll have to live with. Do you perceive your cat as a disposable item, to have or have not?

[amaysngrace]

Is he taking any over-the-counter medication to help with the allergies? There are also some kick-ass prescriptions ones available as well as shots. Honestly, his allergies don't sound THAT BAD compared to some friends of mine whose lungs start to shut down when they get near cats. Sniffles and watery eyes can be easily dealt with = better living through chemistry.

 

Your future need not be cat-free, if he is willing.

 

Suffering from allergies stink. I don't care if its not as severe as other people's its still uncomfortable. You think he should have to pop tons of medication to go there?

 

For a cat??

 

OP if it were me I wouldn't pay a penny of rent to live in a place with something that I was allergic to.

[Ami1uwant]

Comming from another poster who is seriously allergic to cats and dogs....not just their hair but also proteins in their saliva.

 

I get allergy shots with them so that heelps but it is not a cure for it. Same with medication...it isnt a cure and you cant take it every day.

 

For me I can be in a house with cats and dogs for some hours....the issue for me is when I sleep in such a home.

 

Because of my severe asthma I will have a rough night sleeping.

 

My brother has a shedding dog. When I go to visit him and see my nephews I take some strong potent stuff called steriods that you cant be on forever. Plus I leave a nebulizer machine there...same type of machine to treat asthma you would get in an ER. I need to use this multiple times during the night.

 

They have hard wood floors which makes cleaning easier. The bedroom I sleep in is off limits to the dog when I am there.

 

I could not live with a cat at all. I might be able to handle a hypoallergenic dog under very strict rules. Like its a two level house and the dog can never come upstairs where the bedrooms are.

[CarrieT]

Suffering from allergies stink. I don't care if its not as severe as other people's its still uncomfortable. You think he should have to pop tons of medication to go there?

 

For a cat??

 

OP if it were me I wouldn't pay a penny of rent to live in a place with something that I was allergic to.

 

Again, everyone's allergies vary and for some, simple medication is effective.

 

The OP already stated that he HAS been visiting so the extent of his allergy may not be as uncomfortable for him as it is for others. We don't know and the OP won't know without talking about it with him.

 

And, yes - for a cat. Or for any animal that is important to a person.

[amaysngrace]

Again, everyone's allergies vary and for some, simple medication is effective.

 

The OP already stated that he HAS been visiting so the extent of his allergy may not be as uncomfortable for him as it is for others. We don't know and the OP won't know without talking about it with him.

 

And, yes - for a cat. Or for any animal that is important to a person.

 

I understand that but she wants to live with him.

 

That means he'd have to pay money to live in a place where he takes medicine on a daily basis that could damage his liver and suffer regularly.

 

For a cat.

 

I realize people love their pets but if its between my pet and a person I value it's a no-brainer.

[alexa137]

not moving into together now i mean the future! like a year from now

mylease isnt up til may and his sept so its awhile just thinking about the future

i have a small apt with only 2 bedrooms dont want to lock her up, only have porch but too cold and she would try to escape

i have offered him benadryl claritin etc he does like taking meds

i really hate the cleaning and shedding myself sometimes! alot of work to clean and mostly becxause all my furnitre and clothes are black! and the cat is black and white!

shes getting older like 6 i dont know what will happen a year from now

[meeji]

Something similar happened to my roommate. First of all, I am allergic to cats but I love them. One thing I can say is that after living with mine for 6 years, my body has adapted to him. I still get puffy eyes, runny nose, sneezing like crazy, itching all of that but it's more like once a week. I keep allergy medicine everywhere.

 

 

 

 

Anyway, my roommate was moving in with her boyfriend who is allergic to cats. She left the cat at my apartment but one day she decided to try. She took him to her boyfriends House and 4 months later, he is still there. At first his allergies bothered him but he adapted. He no longer has harsh reactions.

 

I would never get rid of my cat over a guy. If you guys have to live separately then that might be what you have to do if you don't want to get rid of it for him. I wouldn't suggest it. Look for a compromise. Talk to him about out

[HeldbyGravity]

shes getting older like 6 i dont know what will happen a year from now

 

Did you mean the cat is 6? Just a small note here so you're not surprised later- cats have an average life expectancy of anywhere from 14-20 years. You could have ms. kitty for a long, long time. My 14 and 16 year olds are right here on my bed..

 

No one likes the shedding thing. Mine shed like crazy too! All 3 of them. It's just something that happens if you own an animal, ha. You just comb them as best as you can DAILY- if it's a longhaired cat, consider shaving her a few times a year, some vets say to do that. But shedding is a sign of health. A cat who doesn't shed is often sick. Plus, kitties generally don't Like being shaved. I trim one of my cats though with small scissors, just really gentle, and it helps the shedding and coat care. Just be careful around the face, do NOT clip a whisker!

Edited October 12, 2012 by HeldbyGravity

[Emilia]

I understand that but she wants to live with him.

 

That means he'd have to pay money to live in a place where he takes medicine on a daily basis that could damage his liver and suffer regularly.

 

For a cat.

 

I realize people love their pets but if its between my pet and a person I value it's a no-brainer.

 

Thank you. The 'I like animals more than people' comments always freak me out slightly.

[veggirl]

I understand that but she wants to live with him.

 

That means he'd have to pay money to live in a place where he takes medicine on a daily basis that could damage his liver and suffer regularly.

 

For a cat.

 

I realize people love their pets but if its between my pet and a person I value it's a no-brainer.

 

Hope you don't have any pets then. Most people who have pets don't view them as something you just toss aside for someone you have known for 4 mos.

 

Thank you. The 'I like animals more than people' comments always freak me out slightly.

 

Not many people have said they like animals more than people but I also hope you don't have pets. What would you do in OPs situation? Take the cat to a shelter? Open the front door and hope it never finds its way back?

[january2011]

I'm also suspicious that he's managed to be with you all this time and now it's serious and he hates your cat. Has he been pretending all this time until you guys got serious?

 

However, I'm also someone who used to suffer from allergies and I'm not a pet person. I can tolerate them at someone else's house, but I couldn't live with a pet. And I wouldn't want to have to take medication on a regular basis just to be with someone.

 

I think it's the BF or the cat. You've got to choose. I don't think there's a middle ground here.

[amaysngrace]

Hope you don't have any pets then. Most people who have pets don't view them as something you just toss aside for someone you have known for 4 mos.

 

I didn't say I'd do that but I wouldn't blame him for not wanting to move in together with her if she has a cat.

 

Her feelings shouldn't be hurt about it either. If she cares about the guy and the cat makes him suffer she should put him first.

 

Same way that if my dog bit one of my children, while I'm crazy about my Buddy, he'd be gone in a heartbeat if he hurt my kids.

 

Sorry I'm not one of those whacks who value animals more than people.

[seren]

If you are planning to move in and move to a new apartment, maybe you could start looking for a new home for her, you will have plenty of time to look for the right home and for her to adapt. We took a 10 yr old cat in when the owner had to go into a home (she was old age) and she adapted very quickly and lived until she was 18. Saying that I simply cannot imagine losing any of my dogs or cat, but if they absolutely had to go, then I would make sure they went to the best home for them.

[PinkSapphire]

I hope for all of you who seem to think he can just pop pills, you realize that they won't be affective until he is away from the allergen, right? Like, he can pop all the liver damaging and side-effect having pills he can swallow, but it won't change a thing for him until he leaves the premises for a good 20 minutes.

[meeji]

I hope for all of you who seem to think he can just pop pills, you realize that they won't be affective until he is away from the allergen, right? Like, he can pop all the liver damaging and side-effect having pills he can swallow, but it won't change a thing for him until he leaves the premises for a good 20 minutes.

popping pills .. you make it sound sooo dramatic! First of all, its an anitishistimine. It's not like tylenol or asprin which can serverely damage you organs. I wouldn't suggest that he harm himself to be with here.

 

My entire family is allergic to animals and we all have them. We're human and our bodies will adapt. The guy won't be taking more than say 3x a week, the first week that he is there and after that it gets much better. On average, I take 2 benedryl tablets a month to deal with my allergies. My brother has ashtma and my cat slept wit him. His reactions were worse than mine and he didn'tpop pills more and once a week.

 

Some people here are giving realistic suggestions. Don't make the poor girl feel like her relationship is doomed. any guy will understand that she is torn, if he cares for her. I have to say, I would not get rid of my cat for a guy. If he cares about me we should be able to compromise. It shouldn't be all or nothing on one side.

[meeji]

I think it's quite funny (in a disturbing way) how many women suddenly become detectives (He's lying! Have you actually seen this so-called allergy?) and doctors (He can just take a pill! He needs to get shots!) when confronted with a common medical condition.

 

I'm allergic to cats. Allergies are real and it ain't that easy to treat them. Jes sayin'.

 

I don't think they are calling the guy. A liar. If you have read my replies you will see that I also am allergic and so is majority of my family. We all have animals, dspite that factor.the point is. That allergies can be dealt with and sometimes the body takes care of it and medication can be optional after the allergen has been repeated introduced to your system, like anthing else.

Eveyone is different but its certainly not hopeless