cdt76 Posted October 9, 2012 Posted October 9, 2012 Been dating a girl for 5 months now. We don't live together yet, I think she might move in with me in December. I bought a ring the other day but I don't plan on giving it to her or proposing for AT LEAST another 6 months. The think will be close to paid off by then and if she is still around then I definitely will commit. Just had to tell someone since I don't want anyone I know, to know....
Arabella Posted October 9, 2012 Posted October 9, 2012 Why buy the ring when you're not even sure this girl will stick around? How can you know whether you will want to marry her 6 months from now? -A 2
Author cdt76 Posted October 9, 2012 Author Posted October 9, 2012 I thoroughly hope she will be around and I know she is someone I want to spend the rest of my life with. Yes, I got a receipt. I would never buy a ring spur of the moment without having it paid off first. I have never ever thought about buying a ring for a girl since after my divorce in 2007. I guess my hope is that yes, we continue to have a beautiful relationship and the day comes I propose. That is not a bad thing.
Arabella Posted October 9, 2012 Posted October 9, 2012 A relationship 5 months into it is NOT the same relationship it will be 2 years from now. Why rush to buy a ring at this stage? Take the time to actually get to know her before you decide whether she is worth marrying. Things may change once you move in together. -A 4
Author cdt76 Posted October 9, 2012 Author Posted October 9, 2012 Arabella....that's exactly why I'm not giving it to her today! I am going to wait but I know that I felt super excited when buying it and thinking about the look on her face. It's a beautiful ring and she will be breathless. But that's in the future, when it's paid off and we are in a great place. I'm not rushing. I guess I'm more happy that I can get to this point feeling so in love that the possibility is crazy exciting. Oh and her daughter's name is Arabella....coincidence????
yessy21 Posted October 9, 2012 Posted October 9, 2012 its just a LITTLE to soon. give it at least 2 years before proposing 1
Got it Posted October 9, 2012 Posted October 9, 2012 I think it is lovely that you bought the right and very prudent to know that a good year is needed to make a clear assessment. My dad always said that you need to see at least four seasons with the person before making the next step. Keep assessing but I think it is lovely knowing you have the ring and will make a wonderful story down the road if you guys do move to the next stage. I am sure she will be quite tickled about it at that point.
Balzac Posted October 9, 2012 Posted October 9, 2012 Some secret share! You'll know when the time is right. Making the purchase solidifies your desire and intent. You must be feeling like a million bucks. The updates .... Keep 'em coming.
Hawaii50 Posted October 9, 2012 Posted October 9, 2012 its just a LITTLE to soon. give it at least 2 years before proposing I agree 100%. And the only room I'll leave for a different answer is if it was one of those "thunderbolt" things, and you wouldn't have to wait-and a ring wouldn't matter. 1
Arabella Posted October 9, 2012 Posted October 9, 2012 Arabella....that's exactly why I'm not giving it to her today! I am going to wait but I know that I felt super excited when buying it and thinking about the look on her face. It's a beautiful ring and she will be breathless. But that's in the future, when it's paid off and we are in a great place. I'm not rushing. I guess I'm more happy that I can get to this point feeling so in love that the possibility is crazy exciting. Oh and her daughter's name is Arabella....coincidence???? It just seems to me that buying a ring, regardless of whether it's given at the time or not, is pretty much making the decision that you will marry her. If at some point things really go south, you're subconsciously less likely to end the relationship because you've already invested money into the ring. Arabella is the main character in an opera of the same name.
Author cdt76 Posted October 9, 2012 Author Posted October 9, 2012 I was on here regularly back in 2009-2011. From the place I was emotionally at that time to the place I am today is a completely different life. It feels great to be able to make this kind of committment and internally know that should it work out the way I would like then the world is a wonderful place and if it doesn't, then it's fantastic that I've gotten myself to this point. I believe she is the one. I love myself and love her. I really love her. It's a fantastic feeling. 1
happyme Posted October 9, 2012 Posted October 9, 2012 Congratulations cdt76, I am happy for you! You sound very happy and secure within yourself, and I am sure it will all work out for you
yessy21 Posted October 9, 2012 Posted October 9, 2012 AT least you know what you want. Just make sure you give it to the right person. 1
Author cdt76 Posted October 9, 2012 Author Posted October 9, 2012 I believe in my heart this is the one. I'm waiting for a few more months just to make sure but I'm hopful. So hopeful I went out and bought the ring.
Lauriebell82 Posted October 10, 2012 Posted October 10, 2012 My husband told me he looked at rings about 6 months before he proposed. Not all men decide they want to propose, buy a ring, and ask. Just make sure you are 100% sure before you pop the question.
newmoon Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 i think it sounds very romantic - you must already love her a great deal and i hope, when the time is right, it works out for you :-)
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