Author dreamstate83 Posted October 15, 2012 Author Share Posted October 15, 2012 i'm considering breaking NC to contact my ex because he owes me money. and i'm very broke. what should i do? How did things end with him? Many people in breakup situations just shrug off any financial responsibility unfortunately. Link to post Share on other sites
bluefairy812 Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 How did things end with him? Many people in breakup situations just shrug off any financial responsibility unfortunately. we were sad, we are not on bad terms, however, to say we are on the best terms ever? not at all. we are OK. but i'm seriously very broke and it's not right to just let this slip up. he is buying himself new tech toys and i'm sure spending money on his new girlfriend. Link to post Share on other sites
River Rain Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 we were sad, we are not on bad terms, however, to say we are on the best terms ever? not at all. we are OK. but i'm seriously very broke and it's not right to just let this slip up. he is buying himself new tech toys and i'm sure spending money on his new girlfriend. He's buying stuff for his new girlfriend...why do you care about that? If you're broke honey, don't rely on an ex...be strong and rely on YOU. Link to post Share on other sites
Svet74 Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 i'm considering breaking NC to contact my ex because he owes me money. and i'm very broke. what should i do? same situation here but i feel like at this point i need to give up on the money. ive been asking for it back for a yr now Link to post Share on other sites
Author dreamstate83 Posted October 15, 2012 Author Share Posted October 15, 2012 same situation here but i feel like at this point i need to give up on the money. ive been asking for it back for a yr now I'll be up front here. You will never see a dime of it. Link to post Share on other sites
bluefairy812 Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 it's f*cked up if you ask me. Link to post Share on other sites
AngrySmile Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 Hey all. I'm back. Really miffed too. Official Facebook Breakup: 9/20 Really broken up: Mid August NC: Uhhh 16 days now? Now here's the weird thing. She hasn't blocked me on FB. I don't make any effort to contact her, if she's on, big whoop, I keepz it moving. I'm still sad, and I haven't deleted any pictures. Nor has she. But I don't have the courage to talk to her, so I know its better not to. We live in the same town, but I moved out and live in...a small rented room. I don't know if she wants to be friends. I don't know anything about her now, and I guess she doesn't give two flying ****s about me. (Which is ok. She broke up with me-because of my own damn problems.) So yah. That's that. Kinda want this **** to get easier. It has for her, why the hell can't it for me just as fast, if not faster. Link to post Share on other sites
Svet74 Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 I'll be up front here. You will never see a dime of it. his mom knows about it lol, maybe she will get him to pay me back. but at this point i dont feel like bothering him about it. I honestly asked for it back when he broke NC which was 3 months and i was fine moving on and was like forget the money. as long as he is not in my life playing games. but of course he broke it to play more games. So that pissed me off and i bothered him again about the money. now hes quiet again. its been a month Link to post Share on other sites
robaday Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 One month. Last contact was her telling me in an email to not contact her anymore and that she had deleted me and all my friends on all the social networks. I think I saw her recently actually from a distance (wasnt sure it was her) whoever it was smiled, but I walked away as quickly as possible in the offchance. Theres still an awful lot of me that wants her in my life as a friend, or in some capacity. Its taken all my strength not to try and smoothe things over - I did just after we finaly broke up saying I said I wanted to be friends down the line and regretted that we were on bad terms. She doesnt seem interested in having any contact with me so theres nothing I can do. I dont want her back. But yeah it still stings, because I feel that she has created an immense amount of awkwardness - she drinks in same areas I do, shes friends with my best mate, her best friend is one of my friends.....basically we cant even be civil with each other if we saw each other out, think its that thats hurt me, not the break up itself.ah well, what can you do? Link to post Share on other sites
antelope82 Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 Breakup: 06/28/12 Was soon to be engaged. Well technically I'm back at day 1 again...but only because I was watching our cat over the weekend, and I wasn't planning on being home when she picked it up but I just needed to tell her how upset she's made me feel everytime we did break NC. She got a bit of a butt kicking from me, almost walked out, but after I told her, "you always run away from criticism instead of trying to understand where it's coming from" and then she stayed, we hung out for a bit, (watched Walking Dead), said goodbye and now I will plan on not talking to her for a while. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dreamstate83 Posted October 16, 2012 Author Share Posted October 16, 2012 Breakup: 06/28/12 Was soon to be engaged. Well technically I'm back at day 1 again...but only because I was watching our cat over the weekend, and I wasn't planning on being home when she picked it up but I just needed to tell her how upset she's made me feel everytime we did break NC. She got a bit of a butt kicking from me, almost walked out, but after I told her, "you always run away from criticism instead of trying to understand where it's coming from" and then she stayed, we hung out for a bit, (watched Walking Dead), said goodbye and now I will plan on not talking to her for a while. Not to derail your post but that episode rocked. Link to post Share on other sites
a.b Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 So proud of myself, she messaged me on facebook 3 times yesterday and I ignored them! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mishy Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 2 days and right now i feel like i could do NC for eternity, until the sun burns out and it wouldnt bother me Lying $#@!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Regrets58 Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 Back at day 1 in theory but doesn't seem like it somehow. She texted a few days ago asking how I was. Finally got round to dropping her an email yesterday,just a catch up thing. Got a reply this morning,brief discussion about our respective love lives(both with other people now)amongst other things. Feels ok so far,maybe I have turned a corner.Hope so. Link to post Share on other sites
mvc Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 been 1 month. kinda sad that after everything, this is how things are now. oh well, what can you do? Link to post Share on other sites
Sunslides Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 I am NO CONTACT since September 11th. So close to 5 weeks now. It's hard... but she is now with someone else now. Picking myself up, one day at the time. Thanks to this forum! Link to post Share on other sites
NavyAirTraffic Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 Back to day 1 for me. She texted me last night "I miss you" and wanted to see me. She just left. Probably a ginormous breadcrumb. Link to post Share on other sites
JayL Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 (edited) Break up just over 5 weeks ago. I broke NC last night by texting her "I miss you...." She did not respond. Someone slap me. Nothing compares to her performance in bed... all my ex girlfriends before her were LOGS! My ex-gfs that were with me for few to several years, I was over them quick, 3 months tops. This one I was with for only 1 1/2 months, it's been 1 1/4 months and I still wake up at night with her crossing my mind, I still wake up in the morning with her being the first thought I have, I still go to bed at night with her being the last thing on my mind... It's insane and I don't know wtf is going on... I know for a fact that she's banging some next dude already as she has that "history". I need her out of my mind ASAP. If I could remove my brain and sanitize that part where she's stuck in, I would. Edited October 16, 2012 by JayL Link to post Share on other sites
NavyAirTraffic Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 Break up just over 5 weeks ago. I broke NC last night by texting her "I miss you...." She did not respond. Someone slap me. Nothing compares to her performance in bed... all my ex girlfriends before her were LOGS! My ex-gfs that were with me for few to several years, I was over them quick, 3 months tops. This one I was with for only 1 1/2 months, it's been 1 1/4 months and I still wake up at night with her crossing my mind, I still wake up in the morning with her being the first thought I have, I still go to bed at night with her being the last thing on my mind... It's insane and I don't know wtf is going on... I know for a fact that she's banging some next dude already as she has that "history". I need her out of my mind ASAP. If I could remove my brain and sanitize that part where she's stuck in, I would. You know the mistake you made so I'm not going to beat you up about it. My situation resembles yours very much so, short passionate relationship, best ever in bed, ended when things were good, ended during the "honeymoon phase". I was having a hard time too but I think I turned a corner. I just saw her last night, slept together even, but I felt different. I really think the things I'm doing are working. I believe you must attack the pain head on, it's there, it is seeping right now slowly but surely you are going to go through phases. From what I learned I started to accept the pain, dive into the deepest parts, and because of it I am becoming numb to it. These are the usual pains that heartbroken dumpees feel over a long time, if you attack it now you'll save yourself heartache over the long run. Here is what I did, I'm no expert so my word isn't law. Just that these things have exponentially improved my situation. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/351364-my-guide-how-get-over-them-fast Link to post Share on other sites
mtnbiker Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 Break up: 09-16-12 NC Since: 09-16-12 Stopped mild depression: 09-24-12 Took her down from the pedestal I put her up on: 10-08-12 Almost completely over the relationship: 10-14-12 Link to post Share on other sites
NavyAirTraffic Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 No offence, but you may want to revise your guide a bit if she could get you back in the sack that quickly LOL! I'm a man, I have needs, I can't deny that. This time around I wasn't as attached, it wasn't bliss, she left and I just started my day. I have no urge to call her, I have no intent on taking her back. Taking her back is a possibility but I'm not doing the work, I didn't break our relationship. I think what I have been doing is working, so no I won't revise it. I believe I'm losing the emotional attachment to her. Isn't that what we all talk about!?! "Fix yourself so when/if they come back you can make the correct decisions and not react based on emotion". I felt clear last night, I thought before I spoke, I thought from a position of "want" and not "need". Time will tell, and I'll keep you guys updated. Link to post Share on other sites
JayL Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 You know the mistake you made so I'm not going to beat you up about it. My situation resembles yours very much so, short passionate relationship, best ever in bed, ended when things were good, ended during the "honeymoon phase". I was having a hard time too but I think I turned a corner. I just saw her last night, slept together even, but I felt different. I really think the things I'm doing are working. I believe you must attack the pain head on, it's there, it is seeping right now slowly but surely you are going to go through phases. From what I learned I started to accept the pain, dive into the deepest parts, and because of it I am becoming numb to it. These are the usual pains that heartbroken dumpees feel over a long time, if you attack it now you'll save yourself heartache over the long run. Here is what I did, I'm no expert so my word isn't law. Just that these things have exponentially improved my situation. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/351364-my-guide-how-get-over-them-fast Yup, I've been doing that... I went out a lot, I partied and drank a lot, met people, met friends, reconnected with old friends, I spent thousands of dollars on new clothes and I've been getting compliments left, right and center. I had this blonde girl ask me 3 times already to go on a date with her, I turned her down, 2 other girls have been constantly messaging me, I told them both that I have baggage and don't want to lead them on. Occasionally, I took that "me" time to grieve, cry and let it all out. I've done it last week and did it last night. I've been holding it in for way too long and it feels great to let it out. I think it's the fact that She knew that she was not that into me and yet, she told me she liked me, she introduced me to her entire family, started talking about meeting her whole family this coming Christmas etc. Then a month and a half later (5 weeks ago), she told me the truth, that she wasn't really that interested in me, but she finds me attractive, she said I have all the qualities she looks for in a man, financially stable, I have a career, I have a future, good potential "husband" qualities etc. , but she's more attracted the type of guys that needs "fixing" (eg. no education, working blue collar, parties a lot, not taking life seriously, no ambitions etc.) She put my hopes way up and shot me right down while I was at the peak. I saw the signs, I attempted to walk away, but she stopped me many times, cried in front of me when I told her we had to stop it. I just feel stupid for staying when I knew I was walking on egg shells and it was a matter of time until it ends. I guess I really was deep into the "honeymoon stage" and she wasn't, but wanted me to stay because she's afraid she might not find another guy like me as she's been single for 5 yrs and haven't found anyone with my qualities, according to her. That last message last night will be the last time I lose respect for myself though. I'm really, really, really walking away from this as I know for a fact that she doesn't feel the same for me, that it was all in her mind, not in her heart. Link to post Share on other sites
Mspink702 Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 BU 10/9.. I text him 10/10 and told him i missed him. After that it was NC until He texted me yesterday and said "Good morning how are you?" I shouldn't have responded but I wanted to see what he wanted so I said "I'm okay what's up?" he said "I just wanted to say hello" why do they do that? It's just a big mind fck! Link to post Share on other sites
NavyAirTraffic Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 That last message last night will be the last time I lose respect for myself though. I'm really, really, really walking away from this as I know for a fact that she doesn't feel the same for me, that it was all in her mind, not in her heart. I'm not saying that I am 100% better, just 100% better than I was. If that makes sense? I still think about her, but not as much. The thought of her being with other people, her getting married and having babies with someone else don't hurt as bad. Yes they hurt, but not as bad. There is no shortcut to getting over someone, I believe that there is a process that every broken heart goes through. One suggestion would be to stay away from alcohol, I think everyone will agree with that, or at least limit yourself to 1-2 drinks. You have 2 thoughts going on at one time right now, your head and your emotions, and they are battling. Alcohol really fuels your emotional thoughts and clouds your judgement at this stage. Link to post Share on other sites
witmadskilllz Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 year relationship broke up 2 years ago. Received a text(breadcrumbs) 2 months ago, ignored it and remained NC. NC: 2years+ and counting Link to post Share on other sites
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