I hate having this insecure feeling

[avsguy01]

Alright me and my girlfriend had a pretty extensive talk last night about our place in the relationship. I have just been so insecure lately about whether she really cared for me and was 100% interested in the relationship. Granted we havent seen each other for a little over 2 weeks, due to vacation and other activity schedules, so that may have some to do with it. But heres the problem i am having. She told me last night that she really cares about me and and is extemely crazy about me but she admits that she has walls up. She was hurt pretty badly about a year ago from her ex-boyfriend that lied and dropped her after 2 years of a relationship. So now she is hesitant about getting fully into a relationship. The strange thing is though, at first it was the other way around. I was the one not really sure of wanting a relationship and she had wanted one. She came on to me and I eventually grew close to her and we became exclusive. Weve been exclusive for 3 1/2 months. Well in that time I have really grown fond and had fallen for her. To me this is the furthest emotionally i have been into a girl. So this one is really special to me. I dont know exactly what love is, but this relationship is beginning to feel different from anything ive ever had before. Ive told her that i love her a few times, and she has too. But each time its happened this same conversation has come up. She continuely says that we need to slow down and just have fun again which i agree to, but then again i am going with the flow of things from my side and my falling for her is just happening, and theres not much i can seem to do. I can understand somewhat why she has these walls up, but why would she tell me that she loves me sometimes but then contradict herself? I know she continuely expresses that she really cares for me and is crazy about me but i still have this insecure feeling. How can i ease myself and relax more to have her come to me comfortably? Im definately confused about how to express myself towards her about how much i care for her and that i am falling if not in love with her. I need some feedback on this guys. Get me pointed in the right direction with this. I want to rid this insecure feeling, and i dont want to screw this up with us.

 

Thanks

Michael

[avsguy01]

Any advice anyone? I would appreciate it

[TommyGirl]

Seems like you may have some walls up too. Just go with the flow of things, don't worry so much about who's caring more for who. If you see signs that give you a gut feeling that something is wrong, be careful to listen to it. Always communicate with her everytime that you feel that something is wrong, don't let anything linger or wait to long to talk about something. It's only been about 4 months, so give things more time to develop. I hope this helps, and always remember to pray about things and keep God first.