bigred0489 Posted October 18, 2012 Share Posted October 18, 2012 Hello! Basically, I worked with a girl when we were both students, we got on really well, flirted a lot, the usual. Others even picked up on it. When the relationship i was in broke down, I thought that maybe me and her might hit it off (i really REALLY like/d her). However, I missed my chance or just didn't make the move which I have always regretted. So a few months later I met someone else and that was that, me and work girl remained really friendly/flirty but nothing more. People have always asked why me and her weren't an item, we would be great together and so on, one even said "just hurry up, kiss her and get it all over with". About 6 months ago my newer relationship ended and rather than rushing into something as i feel i did last time (me and the recent ex were not compatible on any level...), I decided to just have some me time for the first time in 6+ years (Im 23 btw). So, last night, I get a text from the girl i used to work with, asking how i was, general chat. She then suggested meeting up for a catch up and said she has missed me since we both left the workplace in pursuit of careers. I said that sounded really good, name a place & a time and i'll be there. So next week the two of us are meeting up (im not sure where we're going yet, or if it'll be day/night time). So based on the above, I dont know if this is a couple of friends meeting up for a coffee and a catch up, or if this is a "date" of some description. *I REALLY like her *We flirted for the best of 4 years at work *Other people have picked up on it/made suggestions, jokes, told me I must be "blind" not to see it... *At work events we were always together and there are numerous photos of the two of us together, her arms wrapped around me... Any advice would be appreciated. We're both young professionals now and in all the time I have known her I have never known her to have a partner. Link to post Share on other sites
PYTpisces Posted October 18, 2012 Share Posted October 18, 2012 This isnt a date, but may be a perfect opportunity to ask her out on one! A date in my opinion is when you objectively ask someone out 1 on 1, like asking her out to dinner or something. Whatever the case, it has to be objective and clear. Keep your inentions clear. Make sure you know what her intentions are. Good luck!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author bigred0489 Posted October 18, 2012 Author Share Posted October 18, 2012 This isnt a date, but may be a perfect opportunity to ask her out on one! A date in my opinion is when you objectively ask someone out 1 on 1, like asking her out to dinner or something. Whatever the case, it has to be objective and clear. Keep your inentions clear. Make sure you know what her intentions are. Good luck!! That crossed my mind, Im almost positive she knows that I like her. A few months ago, when I was drunk (of which I am rather embarrassed...) I did get in touch with her, asking her out in a round-about kind of way, she replied the following morning asking how the head was, so I assumed that was her way of saying no. But yeh, Im looking forward it, Its the first time the two of us have met up alone together, we've always been in the company of co-workers. Hopefully it'll all go well and I might get a chance to meet up again! Link to post Share on other sites
River Rain Posted October 18, 2012 Share Posted October 18, 2012 Hello! Basically, I worked with a girl when we were both students, we got on really well, flirted a lot, the usual. Others even picked up on it. When the relationship i was in broke down, I thought that maybe me and her might hit it off (i really REALLY like/d her). However, I missed my chance or just didn't make the move which I have always regretted. So a few months later I met someone else and that was that, me and work girl remained really friendly/flirty but nothing more. People have always asked why me and her weren't an item, we would be great together and so on, one even said "just hurry up, kiss her and get it all over with". About 6 months ago my newer relationship ended and rather than rushing into something as i feel i did last time (me and the recent ex were not compatible on any level...), I decided to just have some me time for the first time in 6+ years (Im 23 btw). So, last night, I get a text from the girl i used to work with, asking how i was, general chat. She then suggested meeting up for a catch up and said she has missed me since we both left the workplace in pursuit of careers. I said that sounded really good, name a place & a time and i'll be there. So next week the two of us are meeting up (im not sure where we're going yet, or if it'll be day/night time). So based on the above, I dont know if this is a couple of friends meeting up for a coffee and a catch up, or if this is a "date" of some description. *I REALLY like her *We flirted for the best of 4 years at work *Other people have picked up on it/made suggestions, jokes, told me I must be "blind" not to see it... *At work events we were always together and there are numerous photos of the two of us together, her arms wrapped around me... Any advice would be appreciated. We're both young professionals now and in all the time I have known her I have never known her to have a partner. I don't think it matters if you label it a date or not, getting together with the girl you like is awesome whatever you call it I agree, that this could be the springboard to an official date, as long as she's not with someone else, I hope it works out for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bigred0489 Posted October 18, 2012 Author Share Posted October 18, 2012 I don't think it matters if you label it a date or not, getting together with the girl you like is awesome whatever you call it I agree, that this could be the springboard to an official date, as long as she's not with someone else, I hope it works out for you. She's single, which is a bonus! I know a label doesn't really matter, but obviously I know how I feel and what I would like to come out of this, but I always found her to be quite confusing... clearly flirty to the point where others notice, but reserved in all other areas. Im waiting for her to get back to me to let me know when she's free (she said she would check her diary, see when she's free and if Im free, we'll meet up, all her idea...!). Im probably rambling now, sorry! Link to post Share on other sites
sweetkiwi Posted October 18, 2012 Share Posted October 18, 2012 to a girl its not a real date. If i were you i would say you can't make it that day, but is she available for dinner the next. Trust me, have the initiative. What are you losing? Nothing. But you could gain a date and useful experience. Link to post Share on other sites
River Rain Posted October 18, 2012 Share Posted October 18, 2012 She's single, which is a bonus! I know a label doesn't really matter, but obviously I know how I feel and what I would like to come out of this, but I always found her to be quite confusing... clearly flirty to the point where others notice, but reserved in all other areas. Im waiting for her to get back to me to let me know when she's free (she said she would check her diary, see when she's free and if Im free, we'll meet up, all her idea...!). Im probably rambling now, sorry! Lol...ramble away, you're excited I know how people can be confusing. I met a guy last spring who was very flirty, always complimenting me, but then it was like pulling teeth to get his email address. I think you'll have more clarity once you're face to face though. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author bigred0489 Posted October 18, 2012 Author Share Posted October 18, 2012 to a girl its not a real date. If i were you i would say you can't make it that day, but is she available for dinner the next. Trust me, have the initiative. What are you losing? Nothing. But you could gain a date and useful experience. I see where you're coming from, but you say what am I losing? Well, if i tell her I cant make the day she suggests (whenever that may be), it's unlikely it'll happen for a while due to work commitments and so on. Its taken this long to even get a little time alone with her. I dont expect to hear from her until the weekend, to confirm what day she is free, from there i was hoping to get some clarity as to what "this" is. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bigred0489 Posted October 18, 2012 Author Share Posted October 18, 2012 Lol...ramble away, you're excited I know how people can be confusing. I met a guy last spring who was very flirty, always complimenting me, but then it was like pulling teeth to get his email address. I think you'll have more clarity once you're face to face though. People really can be confusing!! How did you get on, did you eventually get the email address? Im just hoping for the best, we always got on, I had kind of assumed that was it, missed my chance and she was the "what if" girl, or the "one that got away". So the fact that she initiated contact etc has given me quite a (nervous) boost! Link to post Share on other sites
River Rain Posted October 18, 2012 Share Posted October 18, 2012 People really can be confusing!! How did you get on, did you eventually get the email address? Im just hoping for the best, we always got on, I had kind of assumed that was it, missed my chance and she was the "what if" girl, or the "one that got away". So the fact that she initiated contact etc has given me quite a (nervous) boost! Gosh, yes, I got the email address then he was all nervous about me knowing his last name, so he gave me a fake one...too much drama...I passed quickly on that one! She initiated contact, and as far as we know, it could really just be platonic...but based on your history, I think it's worth a nervous boost! You know, someone mentioned on this thread, something like...tell her you're not available for that date or something like that. Game playing isn't the way you want to go, and I don't think you're going in that direction. I mean, if you like her and she wants to see you, it's worth going for, even if it just ends up being two good friends catching up. You won't know until you actually meet her, so seize the day and enjoy the opportunity. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bigred0489 Posted October 20, 2012 Author Share Posted October 20, 2012 Gosh, yes, I got the email address then he was all nervous about me knowing his last name, so he gave me a fake one...too much drama...I passed quickly on that one! She initiated contact, and as far as we know, it could really just be platonic...but based on your history, I think it's worth a nervous boost! You know, someone mentioned on this thread, something like...tell her you're not available for that date or something like that. Game playing isn't the way you want to go, and I don't think you're going in that direction. I mean, if you like her and she wants to see you, it's worth going for, even if it just ends up being two good friends catching up. You won't know until you actually meet her, so seize the day and enjoy the opportunity. Wow! Sounds like you dodged a bullet there! She came in to my place of work yesterday despite saying that she wouldn't be able to for a while, stood chatting for a while before she left, still not sure what we're doing or where we're going yet, but it's all still on and she invited me to a party at her place in a couple weeks time too! Link to post Share on other sites
River Rain Posted October 20, 2012 Share Posted October 20, 2012 Wow! Sounds like you dodged a bullet there! She came in to my place of work yesterday despite saying that she wouldn't be able to for a while, stood chatting for a while before she left, still not sure what we're doing or where we're going yet, but it's all still on and she invited me to a party at her place in a couple weeks time too! I'm very glad I dodged that bullet early on, but in reality, the blinders would have come off at some point and it would have fallen apart, but with even more hurt feelings probably. It sounds like she likes you, enjoys your company. She made the effort to visit you at work, that's a good sign! But yes, it'll all come down to when you two meet one on one! I really hope it works out for you, it's kind of exciting Link to post Share on other sites
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