Delilah145 Posted October 28, 2012 Share Posted October 28, 2012 I have been married to a man for 8 years. For our entire marriage, I've been subjected to sexual, physical and psychological abuse. We are the parents of 2 4 year old twins. We have been separated for two years but have been living together because of financial considerations (I can't afford to provide for my kids and maintain a residence based on what I make). I am desperate to move on with my life and be away from this person who has taken so much from me. Unfortunately, I never went to the police or hospital out of fear of what he might do to me or what would happen to our financial situation if I went to the police and he lost his job and security clearance. I'm afraid that I have no proof of this abuse and simply can't afford to retain a lawyer to determine what my legal options are. I'm hopeful that someone has some advice for me or has been through a similar circumstance. I am also hoping that I can have the courts mandate that my husband pay for my lawyer fees since he earns approximately 70% of our household earnings. Thank you in advance for any help that you can provide! Link to post Share on other sites
CopingGal Posted October 28, 2012 Share Posted October 28, 2012 I'm so incredibly sorry. Have you tried calling a domestic violence hotline in your country from a phone outside the house? Link to post Share on other sites
taya Posted October 28, 2012 Share Posted October 28, 2012 lady you better go to the police and stop worrying what he may do you better so some thing move out go to family members or your parents or some thing omg am sorry but time as come for you to take the first step ..and hes not a husband but a woman beater and a coward Link to post Share on other sites
M30USA Posted October 28, 2012 Share Posted October 28, 2012 I have been married to a man for 8 years. For our entire marriage, I've been subjected to sexual, physical and psychological abuse. We are the parents of 2 4 year old twins. We have been separated for two years but have been living together because of financial considerations (I can't afford to provide for my kids and maintain a residence based on what I make). I am desperate to move on with my life and be away from this person who has taken so much from me. Unfortunately, I never went to the police or hospital out of fear of what he might do to me or what would happen to our financial situation if I went to the police and he lost his job and security clearance. I'm afraid that I have no proof of this abuse and simply can't afford to retain a lawyer to determine what my legal options are. I'm hopeful that someone has some advice for me or has been through a similar circumstance. I am also hoping that I can have the courts mandate that my husband pay for my lawyer fees since he earns approximately 70% of our household earnings. Thank you in advance for any help that you can provide! Can you specify what kind of abuse he has subjected you to? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Delilah145 Posted October 28, 2012 Author Share Posted October 28, 2012 "For our entire marriage, I've been subjected to sexual, physical and psychological abuse..." I've been told that going to the police is not an option because of statute of limitations... the physical and sexual abuse has stopped for the past 6 months as I have told him that I would go to the police if it continued but the psychological abuse continues... Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted October 28, 2012 Share Posted October 28, 2012 Contact your local women's shelter. They have counselors available who specialize in domestic violence. They can assist you with resources and guide you in the right direction to help you plan your escape. Good luck. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Eve Posted October 28, 2012 Share Posted October 28, 2012 I noticed the other day that there are numbers pinned at the top of this part of the board which will direct you to appropriate support. I hope you pick up the phone and get help. All the questions you need to ask, ask. I envy you your twins but understand that there is the pressure to provide - but if they grow up to see this going on around them they will be damaged potentially forever. There is support out there to help you with every stage; from inital talking, making a plan and executing the plan to leave and have somewhere else to go. Support with financial and legal guidance and short to long term emotional and practical support! Find out what support there is and break the code of silence you are living in. This time next year you will be in a completely different place, if you start the process now. You know what will keep happening if you stay. Protect your children from harm. That is the priority. Take care, Eve x 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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