Is he affrais of commitment

[Fay]

I really dont know exactly what to say but my I have been going out with a guy for just over a year, I really want to take things to the nxt level but he seems to be quite happy still being on the level that his friends interfere with our relationship. We dont live together and it is really hard to try to make things work when we're at two different houses and because we are it's really hard for me to try to have a life together when we have to worry about his and my parents and having a serious relationship and finsh school and satisfy his friends and his parents. I've spoken to him about telling his friends to basically get out of our lifes bit he says it would cause to much stress for him which makes me feel unimportant in his life. Please if you can help me or at least ask me to explain more and then try to help me it would be great, thanks

 

FAY

[Tony T]

He's not afraid of commitment, he's just immature. He doesn't understand realtionships, he doesn't understand your needs. You have not given your ages, but it sounds like he's pretty young.

 

If you seek more in a relationship than he is willing to give, I suggest you look elsewhere.

 

In the old days, people lived with their parents or separately in their own apartments until marriage. It seems today, whenever things start getting serious people want to rush to live together. That's pretty cool but both partners don't always see it the same way.

 

I think your guy has some growing up to do. If he lets his friends influence his life so much and makes you feel second to them, hit the road. You need someone who will put you first and make you feel special.

[Deejette]

I don't think there is anything you can do to get him more interested in commitment, except to tell him that that is what you are looking for in a relationship. If he can't come forward with some plans of his own for you both, then you may have to start dating again.

 

This may perk up his interest. While he is spending time with his friends, you can tell him you are going out to the club to dance a little and meet some guys.

 

But you cannot nag him into making a commitment. That won't work.

He's not afraid of commitment, he's just immature. He doesn't understand realtionships, he doesn't understand your needs. You have not given your ages, but it sounds like he's pretty young. If you seek more in a relationship than he is willing to give, I suggest you look elsewhere.

 

In the old days, people lived with their parents or separately in their own apartments until marriage. It seems today, whenever things start getting serious people want to rush to live together. That's pretty cool but both partners don't always see it the same way. I think your guy has some growing up to do. If he lets his friends influence his life so much and makes you feel second to them, hit the road. You need someone who will put you first and make you feel special.