She dumped me - but keeps contacting

[coffeelover86]

Hi everyone...Like (I guess) everyone at this forum I've got a problem.

Firstly I'll explain somethings. 2 years ago I met a girl at a party! It was instant love from both sides and we started dating. After 1year and 2 months we started living together. This was going with big ups and downs. We had some differences and never really spoke about them, because we were both really busy finding our new way of living.

About 8 weeks ago, when I came home from work, she had packed her bags and said she was leaving the house. We were'nt over, but she needed time (you know the story )

 

After 3 days she contacted me and wanted to talk to me. She said she didn't want to break up, but that we needed to work for our relationship. I still wanted this, so agreed. But the day after she called me and said she couldn't be with me. She didn't really give me a reason at that time.

 

After one week she came by and told me she needed time for herself. She had never really lived on her own (moved from her parents straight into an apartment with me). She wanted to be sure that she could manage on her own. She is a very insecure type. I always tried to help her and maybe that's were we went wrong. She said she still loved me very much, but was to depending on me. She wanted to be independent. She didn't want any other relationship but wanted to grow as a person. Seeing her I could feel this reason. Though I didn't like it, I wished her succes. I told her then we both needed time and space.

 

But she kept on calling me. Mostly crying cause her whole life was going the wrong way, as she said. I always listened and was nice, also said that she needed to find out what she truly wanted. After 4 weeks of her texting and calling me she all of the sudden stood in front of the door. Asking if we could be a couple again. I told her yes, but she couldn't move in with me again. We were going to rebuild things slowly we decided.

But from that moment on she didn't text anymore. I was very insecure and doubting the whole situation. So after two weeks again we broke up.

This is now 2 weeks ago. I told her she shouldn't contact me anymore, cause I wanted to move on.

In the meantime she has arranged her own room - so she's living on her own for the first time.

But she still keeps calling me, crying over how bad her life is.

On one hand I want her back, cause (even after all) I really do love her, on the other hand I being pushed in some kind of friend zone when talking to her nicely on the phone when she's crying over how bad her life is.

 

She doesn't have that much friends and says I'm the only one who knows how she is really feeling. But in the meanwhile friends don't even know she is crying almost constantly.

Sometimes I have the feeling she is eating her cake, but wants to have it too. That's the reason I told her not to contact me, cause I didn't want to get hurt anymore.

Question is: what can I do best? Mostly after 4 days she ends up texting me nonsense like: i still need stuff from your place, so I'm going to pick it up. Oh btw how are you doing?

Yesterday again. I told her that she could pick up all her stuff sunday. That was that.

How should I act then? What should I do? I really want to give us another chance. She feels something apparently otherwise she wouldn't keep texting. Should I stick to no contact, let myself heal and have a look afterwards? Or just text back and be nice all the time?

[River Rain]

If you really want to give your relationship another chance, why wait? You have a feeling she wants to get back together so it's time to find out.

 

I think you need to talk to her (in person) and be clear about what you want out of the relationship. If you want to take things slowly again, tell her in detail, what I mean, is that don't just say "let's take things slowly"...that's confusing. Tell her that you want to live apart, contact each other on the phone every day (or every other day etc), keep texting, spend weekends together, and whatever else you want. Tell her you both need to rebuild your trust, but that it'll take time to get back to the place you were before, but that you're willing. You can both heal together you know. Then see if she'll agree to it.

 

Being direct, honest and very clear about your intentions will make her feel more at ease and you'll both feel more secure about the situation. When you feel at ease like this, you can have a mature discussion about what you expect and what boundaries you need to set.

[coffeelover86]

This surely is the way I'd like it to go. But the last few weeks it has been that everytime when I came closer, she pushed me further.

Ending into the fact that I was really comforting her the whole time. And she would say we just were friends, nothing more.

I don't want to be just a friend, so I told her not to contact me.

What she says is not what she shows....therefor I'm not sure whether SHE is willing to give it another chance...

[River Rain]

The mixed signals are so difficult. But if she says she just wants to be friends, but keeps contacting you for a shoulder to cry on...then yeah, maybe some nc will be better for you because you have to think of yourself too. It's really nice that you're there for her, but I've been in that situation, and to go from lover to only friends is too difficult for me. But you have to make sure you stick to it, because she might try to break contact because she knows you've responded in the past.

[coffeelover86]

Thanks for the quick response. These are exactly the doubts I'm having. On the other hand I'm like: well if there is no contact - and she still wants me back, she can catch up with me again.

I just want to have the feeling that I really don't mind what happens....If this is best for her, than it's also better for me....I don't want these selfish feelings. But by telling her this, I'm still playing games....In no contact I still admit that contact is hard for me!

We'll see what happens tomorrow....We'll see how I'll think about this in 20 years.

[rn0408]

I have crazies chase me all the time and have dealt with alot of nutjobs (Only one snuck through the cracks). I had a really good friend who I dated want a "break." I decided to be hot on the market as soon as it was over. She contacted me two weeks later and told her I don't want to jeparodize a 11 year friendship. It was a healthy breakup. We are good friends and keep in contact. Hopefully we will hang out soon when we aren't busy. She is attracted to tools and abusive people..I can't help that. She told me she didn't want to have sex before getting married and let one of her ex's do her (not when we were dating) in college. I told her I wouldn't of done that since I respect her and her viewpoints..she couldn't belive it lol.

 

Some people after dating or a relationship can be good friends...this one sounds like a wacko.

 

Red flags:

 

-Insecure

-She wanted a break or time to herself..a break means its OVER. Shes probably trying to emotionally abuse you and control you for her own benefit.

-Keeps on calling you and it sounds like she has no limits.

 

 

NO Contact..let her cry her sorrows away..It will drive her nuts but it's not your problem.

[coffeelover86]

UPDATE.

Thanks for your point of view rn0408. I can see your point. I've been doubting myself as well whether these were normal things to do. But hey, even if you broke up, if you have troubles for yourself you can still love somebody....but then again it's not possible to be together (or am I twisting things the right way for myself?)

 

Anyhow, Yesterday she came to pick up her stuff. First off all she came 2 hours late. Saying she found it really difficult to pick up her stuff, cause then it would be really over. I told her it was over already and that she could pick up the stuff. Also asked whether she wanted coffee (maybe i'm too nice ) So we had coffee and started talking about what happened in our lives the past few months and how she felt. This actually is the first time she is living on her own, and she is really struggling, she told me. She really gets to know a lot of herself. She gets to know herself, something she said she lost a bit in the relationship. I asked her what she wanted.

Doubtfull she told me she still loved me, is in love with me, thinks I'm hot, and really wanted to be with me in the future. That our high times were really great, but that she struggled with the down times and she was wondering how we would manage that.

She said she would wanted to try with me, slowly, committed but not jumping in or rushing in. Just as slow as we took it already.

I told her how I felt and that we could see how things will work out. She even nearly kissed me, but I didn't think this would be a great idea.

 

On leaving she asked me whether I would come by to her new place to check it out and have dinner this week. I told her I'd love that.

 

But, and here is the but.....2 hours later I'm at work, she's calling. She's feeling really indifferent. She had a great talk with me and a great time, loves me very much, but really can't be with me right now, cause she needs to find her own way. She feels she is only hurting me more and more. She's emotionally too attached to do what she likes herself....she said in every action she takes, she takes my opinion in account, even though I'm not there. Again I understand. So I told her, go your own way...contact me when you're ready for it, if you want to. I'll just let you go.

And again during the night she texts me: laying in my bed, really confused! thinking of holding you....you are the nicest thing that ever happened to me.....

 

SO WTF! More red flags, or is she really that doubtfull and should I give her more time to manage her own life?

Should I respond to the text?

Should I just leave her.....though I love her this might be the best option.

How can you want to be together, but not be together?

[beyond]

UPDATE.

Thanks for your point of view rn0408. I can see your point. I've been doubting myself as well whether these were normal things to do. But hey, even if you broke up, if you have troubles for yourself you can still love somebody....but then again it's not possible to be together (or am I twisting things the right way for myself?)

 

Anyhow, Yesterday she came to pick up her stuff. First off all she came 2 hours late. Saying she found it really difficult to pick up her stuff, cause then it would be really over. I told her it was over already and that she could pick up the stuff. Also asked whether she wanted coffee (maybe i'm too nice ) So we had coffee and started talking about what happened in our lives the past few months and how she felt. This actually is the first time she is living on her own, and she is really struggling, she told me. She really gets to know a lot of herself. She gets to know herself, something she said she lost a bit in the relationship. I asked her what she wanted.

Doubtfull she told me she still loved me, is in love with me, thinks I'm hot, and really wanted to be with me in the future. That our high times were really great, but that she struggled with the down times and she was wondering how we would manage that.

She said she would wanted to try with me, slowly, committed but not jumping in or rushing in. Just as slow as we took it already.

I told her how I felt and that we could see how things will work out. She even nearly kissed me, but I didn't think this would be a great idea.

 

On leaving she asked me whether I would come by to her new place to check it out and have dinner this week. I told her I'd love that.

 

But, and here is the but.....2 hours later I'm at work, she's calling. She's feeling really indifferent. She had a great talk with me and a great time, loves me very much, but really can't be with me right now, cause she needs to find her own way. She feels she is only hurting me more and more. She's emotionally too attached to do what she likes herself....she said in every action she takes, she takes my opinion in account, even though I'm not there. Again I understand. So I told her, go your own way...contact me when you're ready for it, if you want to. I'll just let you go.

And again during the night she texts me: laying in my bed, really confused! thinking of holding you....you are the nicest thing that ever happened to me.....

 

SO WTF! More red flags, or is she really that doubtfull and should I give her more time to manage her own life?

Should I respond to the text?

Should I just leave her.....though I love her this might be the best option.

How can you want to be together, but not be together?

 

 

She is being very hot and cold - it's understandable in one way as she is young, never been on her own etc, but it's very hard on you.

 

Look at the bit i've put in bold type above - this is her telling you the truth. She is not ready to be with you, needs to find her own way, live by herself, date others (sorry, I know that will hurt hearing that).

 

You have romantic feelings for her, so you can't be her 'friend'. Make that clear to her and wish her well.

 

Then, keep busy! Go out with friends, take up new interests, exercise etc.

 

XX

[River Rain]

UPDATE.

Thanks for your point of view rn0408. I can see your point. I've been doubting myself as well whether these were normal things to do. But hey, even if you broke up, if you have troubles for yourself you can still love somebody....but then again it's not possible to be together (or am I twisting things the right way for myself?)

 

Anyhow, Yesterday she came to pick up her stuff. First off all she came 2 hours late. Saying she found it really difficult to pick up her stuff, cause then it would be really over. I told her it was over already and that she could pick up the stuff. Also asked whether she wanted coffee (maybe i'm too nice ) So we had coffee and started talking about what happened in our lives the past few months and how she felt. This actually is the first time she is living on her own, and she is really struggling, she told me. She really gets to know a lot of herself. She gets to know herself, something she said she lost a bit in the relationship. I asked her what she wanted.

Doubtfull she told me she still loved me, is in love with me, thinks I'm hot, and really wanted to be with me in the future. That our high times were really great, but that she struggled with the down times and she was wondering how we would manage that.

She said she would wanted to try with me, slowly, committed but not jumping in or rushing in. Just as slow as we took it already.

I told her how I felt and that we could see how things will work out. She even nearly kissed me, but I didn't think this would be a great idea.

 

On leaving she asked me whether I would come by to her new place to check it out and have dinner this week. I told her I'd love that.

 

But, and here is the but.....2 hours later I'm at work, she's calling. She's feeling really indifferent. She had a great talk with me and a great time, loves me very much, but really can't be with me right now, cause she needs to find her own way. She feels she is only hurting me more and more. She's emotionally too attached to do what she likes herself....she said in every action she takes, she takes my opinion in account, even though I'm not there. Again I understand. So I told her, go your own way...contact me when you're ready for it, if you want to. I'll just let you go.

And again during the night she texts me: laying in my bed, really confused! thinking of holding you....you are the nicest thing that ever happened to me.....

 

SO WTF! More red flags, or is she really that doubtfull and should I give her more time to manage her own life?

Should I respond to the text?

Should I just leave her.....though I love her this might be the best option.

How can you want to be together, but not be together?

 

She's very confused and struggling with her emotions. She loves you and wants to be with you but doesn't want to keep hurting you or lose herself in the relationship. She's reaching out because she trusts you and is likely not trying on purpose to confuse you. This still doesn't make things easy for you though. No matter what advice you get on here, you have to decide on your own how much of this you can handle. I was in a similar situation and I had to just end it because my emotions were taking a beating, even though I still love the guy.

[coffeelover86]

Wow, last two responses were really contradictory. Indeed I have the feeling it is like river rain explains it, but maybe that's hopes as well.

I do want to be there for here, cause she is really struggling. Crying every day (not only over me) but in general about her life. Hard thing indeed is, how do I handle my emotions. Cause what happened yesterday kept me awake at night. Though actually it's a good thing she told me she loved me and is still in love with me. Maybe I should focus more on the positives and let her live her life. Though this is eassier said then done....and if you receive texts like that late at night, it's hard not to think about it.

Though it's also hard to imagine she would text that, if not really like me.

For now I think I just give the both of us rest untill she contacts me again. I'm not responding on the nightly message, telling me she was confused and wanted to hold me in the night... (basically cause I want to give her space for her confusion and that I don't know what to write)

[River Rain]

Wow, last two responses were really contradictory. Indeed I have the feeling it is like river rain explains it, but maybe that's hopes as well.

I do want to be there for here, cause she is really struggling. Crying every day (not only over me) but in general about her life. Hard thing indeed is, how do I handle my emotions. Cause what happened yesterday kept me awake at night. Though actually it's a good thing she told me she loved me and is still in love with me. Maybe I should focus more on the positives and let her live her life. Though this is eassier said then done....and if you receive texts like that late at night, it's hard not to think about it.

Though it's also hard to imagine she would text that, if not really like me.

For now I think I just give the both of us rest untill she contacts me again. I'm not responding on the nightly message, telling me she was confused and wanted to hold me in the night... (basically cause I want to give her space for her confusion and that I don't know what to write)

 

My ex did that to me. He dumped me and then over a three week period, kept writing stuff like he was confused, sad, upset that he lost our love etc.. It was almost like he was wanting me to make the decision to get back together for him. We did get back together recently, but the same problems came up so I had to break up with him. He meant no harm, he was truly confused because he was emotionally immature. I still love him and didn't want to go nc, but the emotional roller coaster ride was just too much for me. You should ask her to stop the texting, be honest and tell her it's not fair because it's causing you hurt.

[coffeelover86]

Wow! Respect in order to be able to do that. I think I'm still too hung up on her to not respond to her calls. And indeed I feel some calmness falling over me when I'm able to comfort her.

Yesterday we had really fun and laughs as well as she said that she would think about me everywhere (even in the supermarket buying chocolate - this after 2 months is hard I can imagine)

I really truly hope that she learns a lot by this experience. I hope she finds a nice room from which she can get to know herself and a lot about life. I'm now living in our former apartment which is ok, but not that enjoyable without her.

In time I hope we can do nice things together again, but maybe indeed it's just too quick. In the meanwhile I just comfort myself with the thought that she at least is thinking just as much about me, as I am about her.

[beyond]

Wow, last two responses were really contradictory. Indeed I have the feeling it is like river rain explains it, but maybe that's hopes as well.

I do want to be there for here, cause she is really struggling. Crying every day (not only over me) but in general about her life. Hard thing indeed is, how do I handle my emotions. Cause what happened yesterday kept me awake at night. Though actually it's a good thing she told me she loved me and is still in love with me. Maybe I should focus more on the positives and let her live her life. Though this is eassier said then done....and if you receive texts like that late at night, it's hard not to think about it.

Though it's also hard to imagine she would text that, if not really like me.

For now I think I just give the both of us rest untill she contacts me again. I'm not responding on the nightly message, telling me she was confused and wanted to hold me in the night... (basically cause I want to give her space for her confusion and that I don't know what to write)

 

Hi Coffee,

 

I don't think Rain and my responses were all that different really. Your ex is not a horrible person, I've had an ex in the past do this to me too.

The natural response with someone you care about who is hurting and reaching out is to help them.

I just think you are emotionally in such different places (her, wanting to explore life on her own as she said to you) and you still wanting her in a romantic way, that you will keep getting hurt and she will be delayed in getting the independance she seems to want, even if she does care for you.

She knows you love her, if you say you can't be her friend right now because it hurts too much, I can't see why she wouldn't understand that.

Further down the line, who knows what might happen, but for now my advice would be to let her go.

 

xx

[River Rain]

Wow! Respect in order to be able to do that. I think I'm still too hung up on her to not respond to her calls. And indeed I feel some calmness falling over me when I'm able to comfort her.

Yesterday we had really fun and laughs as well as she said that she would think about me everywhere (even in the supermarket buying chocolate - this after 2 months is hard I can imagine)

I really truly hope that she learns a lot by this experience. I hope she finds a nice room from which she can get to know herself and a lot about life. I'm now living in our former apartment which is ok, but not that enjoyable without her.

In time I hope we can do nice things together again, but maybe indeed it's just too quick. In the meanwhile I just comfort myself with the thought that she at least is thinking just as much about me, as I am about her.

 

It's VERY difficult...I had to block his email. But in all honesty, if he did call, I'd probably pick up the phone because I would want to comfort him too. But overall, he needs to make changes before we could ever remotely think of trying a third time. Going nc is for you to heal, she might not see it that way, but it'll really help her heal to, get that desperation and hurt taken care of. It really clears the mind too, so all of that confusion she's feeling can be sorted out properly.

[coffeelover86]

Wow, this is really difficult. After the conversation on saturday and the strange text on which I did'n reply on I didn't hear from her to be exactly for 1 day....

She asked my friends how I was doing and what I thought about what happened the other night. They didn't hear about it yet from me.

Last night she called me twice (I was busy so didn't answer) and she texted me afterwards: Sleep well.

 

I was very in doubt whether or not to send het a text back, cause I don't want to play games as well....as in the NC game. So I texted her back. Hey, how are you. Couldn't answer you call, was too busy. Sleep well.

Was this to much....so start all over with NC? I notice myself that i'm really confused again by her sending these short messages - wherefor is she sending them, whilst she knows I just want to heal and hear nothing from her.....Again, again and again!

[Droplet]

She's sending you these texts mostly to get an answer so she can judge through the subcomunication how you feel about her. As soon as she senses that you are still interested, she can sleep soundly because you obviously aren't going anywhere and still want her so she doesn't have to make any effort.

 

Just ignore her for a while and yes that answer was a bit too long ( the "hey how are you" : you DON'T CARE how she does, she dumped you ).

 

You don't want to play games, me neither, I hate it, but you have to.

Just picture dumping a girl because you don't feel any attraction for her anymore. What would make you want her more ? Knowing that she's still waiting for you and is kinda miserable or hearing from people ( because she doesn't talk to you anymore ) that she looks hotter than ever and that she's going out, meeting guys and enjoying her life ? This is not about games, it's just how attraction works sometimes : you place value on that which is rare and valuable, not on what you can have whenever you want.

 

I wish we could just say "listen, I still want you and I'm sorry for what happened, let's get back together" and it would work but it doesn't or otherwise we'd all be married to our exes haha

 

Take care

[coffeelover86]

I understand what you mean. The thing is, I don't really feel miserable. I hear from my friends though that she is crying all the time, sending them messages she is confused....so therefor I get the feeling I need to react cause she is having a tough time.

Maybe this being nice technique isn't best for myself as well....

[Droplet]

I understand but every time you act as a friend you send her the message that you are ok with "just being friends".

 

I know that it's very difficult not to react when you know that she is in pain, but that's because you LOVE her, not because she's your friend, and she knows that.

 

Most of the time, exes don't even really want to be "friends", they want us to hang around just in case the grass isn't greener or because they want to have their cake and eat it too.

 

Do yourself a favour, let her cry. Yes, any communication feels good but if it's not proactive seduction, it isn't going anywhere and you always end up back to square one...trust me, I've been "friends" with my ex for the first three months after our breakup, always been there when she missed me and what did I get in exchange when I asked something from her ? Cancelled meetings for stupid reasons and disrespect.

 

Ignore her and if she really loves you like it seems she does, the thought of losing you will be unbearable to her and she will eventually tell you that she made a mistake if she's not a coward ( if she is, you don't want her in your life anyway ).

[coffeelover86]

Well, thanks for the advice!!! I was really trying! Yesterday she asked me to have dinner together cause she needed to talk to me! It was an ok evening. She talked about a lot - all of the sudden wasn't crying the whole time and said she felt better when I was with her.

Later on she drove us home and asked me to come in. She told me not to have high expectations on her and our relationship cause she is too confused at the moment. I told her - that's ok for now. We sat and watched some telivision and the whole time she told me how nice it was to have me there - then she cuddled up beside me and started kissing me. I stopped and said : this is not good - first search your own way - then tell me what you want!

After an hour I told her i was leaving and she asked me to spend the night - but also said: no sex, just as friends.

I said - no, even without expectations, this is stupid!

And went home.

 

So the evening started ok, with her touching me softly etc....talking about herself and her feelings and how she loved me.

But ended stupid!

Indeed I think she is using me for now - how to make her want me again!!

[Droplet]

She litterally told you : when you are around, she feels better.

 

TRANSLATION : You presence is helping her heal.

 

This is definitely NOT what you want. You don't want her to heal from your relationship, you want her to realize what she lost, what she had, and how much she misses you.

 

If you are around her all the time, providing for her etc, she will get used to your presence and never feel bad about the relationship because in a way, she still has you by her sides. Someday, she will meet someone else and will not have any second thoughts about starting a relationship with that guy because YOU ARE STILL AROUND anyway...

 

See how that works ?

 

She is using you. Maybe not consciously, she is just doing what feels good ( to her ) but it's still a process that she is going through at your expense.

[QdB]

@ droplet....truer words have not been spoken by anyone living lol u obviously speak from experience. Probably the same one I had smh please heed these words...CUT ALL CONTACT!!!

[rn0408]

I was in a situation and I even made the call on this. I cut a girl off after 3 dates and then about a month later it hit me. I told her if she still had feelings for me I wouldn't say no if she wanted me back, and I would still like to be friends if the feelings changed. She is smart, good looking, and fun to be around, but I hit the panic button and it's good i got out. I was being hot and cold and she called me out on it, but I really felt bad for upsetting her, but it was the right thing to do.

 

My red flags:

 

-There was a work situation and she was trying to get me involved in serious drama. Her friend (Girl A) slept with my friend (Guy B) and the guy hit it and quit it. She did not work at my facility but she tried getting me involved in the drama and get info about the guy.

 

-She told me after we broke up before we started dating she was flirting with me when she had a boyfriend. She was really into me and we had a lot in common (After she told me this in a text after what I previously stated above, I knew i dodged a bullet).

 

I'm not going back because I'm thinking of all the negatives and her texting me when she had a boyfriend. I crossed paths with her when I was studying with a female classmate at a Panera and her face was bright red. I really don't care now because that was done and the week before I casually dated a girl before I started dating her..

 

And honestly, I've dated real good ones, but I really enjoy being single. I don't know what drives me towards being single but I really like being "me."

[coffeelover86]

So new update - was leaving for a holiday last week - she knew about this! She texted me good luck and to have fun and that she was jealous for me to go....

I didn't respond to this anymore since it was just somerhing she said and not a question! During my holiday I met another nice girl - slept together but npthing really happened exept for loads of talking! Though during these talks I only could think about my ex (guess it was just too quick)

Didn't hear from my ex the whole week (as opposed to nearly everyday when I was at home)

Now all of the sudden she likes my fb picture and status - no intention of calling her cause there is no use in it - though i like to tell about my holiday. Guess the best thing is still to have nc - though again she's opening up?!

[rn0408]

So new update - was leaving for a holiday last week - she knew about this! She texted me good luck and to have fun and that she was jealous for me to go....

I didn't respond to this anymore since it was just somerhing she said and not a question! During my holiday I met another nice girl - slept together but npthing really happened exept for loads of talking! Though during these talks I only could think about my ex (guess it was just too quick)

Didn't hear from my ex the whole week (as opposed to nearly everyday when I was at home)

Now all of the sudden she likes my fb picture and status - no intention of calling her cause there is no use in it - though i like to tell about my holiday. Guess the best thing is still to have nc - though again she's opening up?!

 

sounds like a clinger..block her and deny all contact

[coffeelover86]

So, I really need your help here.

Went into no contact again; yesterday after 3 weeks we ran into each other. She said she had food for two and if I wanted to join.

I thought; why not - and then she started telling about this new special someone she met. How aroused she was - and that she wanted to tell me earlier. That she sometimes is still thinking about me. But that I should move on and not think that she will come back.

That's clear eh!

So I said; Glad for you. Hope you're being treated well.

Than she said: well it's only lust - no love - and started hugging me as she saw that it hit me a bit (stupid!!!!!)

So I told her i really wanted her in my life - but that now wouldn't be the time since I really like her a lot and don't want to interfere with her new flame!

I left and we said we really want to keep in touch.

Guess what - this morning a call that she wanted to meet up with me on thursday - if I'd like that. In my flabbergasted state I said ok.

But maybe this isn't the best thing to do.

Maybe I should just leave both of us alone for a bit in order to be really friends.

I'm not sure about both our feelings. I mean if she can be onto a new lover this quick I don't even want her anymore...