slant Posted November 6, 2012 Share Posted November 6, 2012 (edited) So my long distance girlfriend lately has been distant sometimes. She's been giving more attention to her friends and so on than me, doesn't always respond to my texts, etc. I brought it up today saying it's making me unhappy. She admitted she is being confusing and distant. I told her I cannot be with her if she is not making me happy anymore; that I can usually handle the physical distance, but not the emotional distance she is giving me. Then she said she sometimes feels more times than not that we shouldn't be together. We both admit we think about being with other people and the distance is sometimes unbearable. It's just hard for me because she is my first girlfriend and I am 23. She made me so happy in the first three months we had together (before it turned long distance three months ago). More and more I feel we cannot handle the distance anymore but I just think of all the memories we have together and it breaks my heart! Is it time to call it quits? Edit: I feel I've been getting more and more upset/unhappy the past couple weeks Edited November 6, 2012 by slant Link to post Share on other sites
WhatYouWantToHear Posted November 6, 2012 Share Posted November 6, 2012 Yes, yes it is. Link to post Share on other sites
River Rain Posted November 6, 2012 Share Posted November 6, 2012 If the emotional distance is hurting you too much, it's time to either talk to her to make compromises or let it go. I'm just saying that because I've been through it myself. I was in a LDR, and I could handle the physical distance, but when he started to shut down on me and ignore me, that I couldn't handle. It effed with my emotions too much. It's hard because I still love him, but he can't give me what I need so I had to cut him out of my life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author slant Posted November 6, 2012 Author Share Posted November 6, 2012 Well we just ended it. It is just too hard for both of us. I feel sick and need to leave work. Link to post Share on other sites
River Rain Posted November 6, 2012 Share Posted November 6, 2012 Well we just ended it. It is just too hard for both of us. I feel sick and need to leave work. I'm sorry. I'm going through the same thing right now, just ended it on Saturday...I still feel sick too. Take care of yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
umirano Posted November 6, 2012 Share Posted November 6, 2012 Pain from an unfulfilling relationship is (in the worst case) continuous and usually you have no guarantee for the relationship to become better again by itself. So one needs to do something, which you did. She is not willing to change anything and honestly told you about her doubts. Good for you. If she were to lead you along you'd suffer even more eventually. You did the right thing and saved yourself continued pain. Now you can clean up the mess and look at ideas on how to move on. I do feel sorry for you, but much more I am happy for you, because you kept the initiative and you took responsibility for yourself. You will be fine someday. Take good care! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
River Rain Posted November 6, 2012 Share Posted November 6, 2012 Now you can clean up the mess and look at ideas on how to move on. I do feel sorry for you, but much more I am happy for you, because you kept the initiative and you took responsibility for yourself. You will be fine someday. Take good care! I really like that ^^. I mean, I'm still riddled with pain and feelings of rejection, but imagine the possibilities that new relationships will bring. Or even just the possibilities of being alone for a while. It's important to grieve and let the emotions out...but not to dwell for too long because life is pretty amazing and way too short to waste away. Link to post Share on other sites
Author slant Posted November 6, 2012 Author Share Posted November 6, 2012 Thank you River Rain and umirano! It's just so hard knowing what we once had and that it is gone now. I told her I have no regrets and will never forget her! It will take me some time to move on I'm sure. I moved to CA for a job and I only know two people here, so I definitely have some work to do. I was never great at meeting people but she taught me so much about life and love, so I can thank her for that. I just can't imagine I'll never see or kiss her again. Sigh, couldn't get through this post without crying a lot. Link to post Share on other sites
River Rain Posted November 6, 2012 Share Posted November 6, 2012 Thank you River Rain and umirano! It's just so hard knowing what we once had and that it is gone now. I told her I have no regrets and will never forget her! It will take me some time to move on I'm sure. I moved to CA for a job and I only know two people here, so I definitely have some work to do. I was never great at meeting people but she taught me so much about life and love, so I can thank her for that. I just can't imagine I'll never see or kiss her again. Sigh, couldn't get through this post without crying a lot. My keyboard is stained from tears too ...let yourself cry. It's hard to lose someone we love, but sometimes necessary because it causes way too much hurt if we do stay. Give yourself time and when you're ready, yes, try to meet new people. That will help a lot. Link to post Share on other sites
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