Alisa.sou Posted November 8, 2012 Share Posted November 8, 2012 About 2 years ago, I met this guy by one of my friends. Lets call him Oli. I had recently turned 18, but this group was way older (about 24-25) and Oli was about 25. We were heading to a club and it was going to be my first clubbing experience. I went to meet my friend (lets call him Frank) and that's when I met Oli. He was very attractive and I seemed to have caught his eyes since he wouldn't let me go the whole night. Might sound cheesy, but we first kissed at that club. From there, we decided to hang out together. After a few weeks, I ended up sleeping with him. Although we kept on seeing each other, we weren't officially dating. I was fine with it since I didn't want to date anyone either. We were both pretty independant.We didn't call or text each other that much. Moments were short, but extremely intense. I had never felt like I did before. After a while, he started showing signs of affection and attachement. Simple gestures, like a kiss on the forehead before I leave him (even when I was asleep before he leaves); long, long hugs and telling each other how good we felt at that very moment; hand holding when we went to take a walk; etc... I started to feel confused because I didn't want to fall in love with him. Unfortunately, I did. Then one day, something happened and we got cold with each other. After a few weeks, he met a girl and dated her for 2 months. One night I was at a friend's party and he showed up with his date. He kissed her in front of me (not sure if he was aware I was next to him). It literally broke my heart. After a while I met my boyfriend and we've been together for almost 2 years now. I erased him from my life to move on with my boyfriend. Despite the fact that we are great together and I love him very much, I've never stopped thinking about Oli. Just a couple of days ago, I bumped into him in a bar while celebrating the birthday of my boyfriend's friend. We talked a little and I told him how much I missed him. He didn't reply the same, but said that he would have given me a hug if my boyfriend wasn't around (he knows my boyfriend doesn't like him). Since that day, my heart has been racing every single minute, lingering to just see him or speak to him again. I can't take it anymore. I am going crazy. I can't focus on anything without thinking about him. I can't be alone for a second or I'll start imagining ways to start a conversation with him. I DO NOT WANT to believe in any possibilities between me and him. I DO NOT WANT to have these constant thoughts and desires in my head. I DO NOT WANT to love him anymore. I DO NOT WANT any of this anymore. I don't understand why it was so easy to forget about my first true boyfriend with whom I've been for 3 years, but not forget this guy who broke my heart and wasn't even anything specific to me. I can't do this any more... Please help me. Oh and I will certainly NOT cheat on my boyfriend. Ever. Fidelity is everything to me. And I apologize for the extremely long description. Link to post Share on other sites
coffeebean201 Posted November 10, 2012 Share Posted November 10, 2012 I think there is something sexy about the way your boyfriend doesn't like him. Male grouchiness. The thing with Oli doesn't sound solid. I don't think he is there for you. But in 5-10 years, Oli might be a really cool friend to have - he sounds like an interesting person. Link to post Share on other sites
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