Friend?Lover?Affair?

[lilQT]

I will try to make this brief. My boyfriend of four years has a friend (Tom) who I have always thought was uh...delicious? Tom has a girlfriend. Over time he and I have become friends as well. Tom was always flirting with me but not publicly because his girlfriend would probably kick his butt or hit him with a frying pan or something. His girlfriend is very rude and overbearing and he has lost most of his friends because of her insulting them. He is afraid to leave her. About a year a bit ago we were at a party and he approached me and started to touch me. I should have stopped him from the start but I had these feelings as well so it was difficult to. This kept happening whenever we were at the same places. About 10 months ago he contacted me by e-mail and basically started to seduce me this way. I cannot plead innocence here because I have flirted back. I also admit that I like this attention from him because I have always liked him. Tom and his girlfriend don't hang around with us and our friends anymore because his girlfriend has alienated him with her attitude so I don't have to deal with him touching me. If I did, I know something bad would happen. My problem is, I think about him all the time. I visualize being with him both romantically and sexually. I don't know if I just want what I cannot have or what? I hate this. Someone please tell me what to do or think when he contacts me so I can be strong enough to deny these feelings. I know I am weak and I feel horrible about the whole situation. Please don't judge me. I need advice.

[Disintegration]

Don't do it, just resist. We all have fantasies. Your relationship with your boyfriend of four years is more important. If Tom's stayed with his girlfriend this long through all of her insulting behavior, he probably won't leave her even if something happens between you two. Think of how you would feel if your boyfriend was doing/thinking all of this behind your back and let that lead you to an answer.

I will try to make this brief. My boyfriend of four years has a friend (Tom) who I have always thought was uh...delicious? Tom has a girlfriend. Over time he and I have become friends as well. Tom was always flirting with me but not publicly because his girlfriend would probably kick his butt or hit him with a frying pan or something. His girlfriend is very rude and overbearing and he has lost most of his friends because of her insulting them. He is afraid to leave her. About a year a bit ago we were at a party and he approached me and started to touch me. I should have stopped him from the start but I had these feelings as well so it was difficult to. This kept happening whenever we were at the same places. About 10 months ago he contacted me by e-mail and basically started to seduce me this way. I cannot plead innocence here because I have flirted back. I also admit that I like this attention from him because I have always liked him. Tom and his girlfriend don't hang around with us and our friends anymore because his girlfriend has alienated him with her attitude so I don't have to deal with him touching me. If I did, I know something bad would happen. My problem is, I think about him all the time. I visualize being with him both romantically and sexually. I don't know if I just want what I cannot have or what? I hate this. Someone please tell me what to do or think when he contacts me so I can be strong enough to deny these feelings. I know I am weak and I feel horrible about the whole situation. Please don't judge me. I need advice.

[Neoncandle]

Hun, you are getting into something much worse than Tom's girlfriend. If you go for Tom, you will either lose both in the end, or tear up both of their lives. Be strong, not stupid. Been there, and I have left a disaster that still hasn't repaired itself.

[kiey]

It's okay to have feeling, sexual or not towards another man, however, you're playing with fire. You will not only hurt your boyfriend, but also Tom and his girlfriend. She's overbearing because a woman knows when a man has a cheating heart. Nothing has started YET, but if you keep playing touchy feely something will. I would back off, because if Tom's that hooked on his girlfriend, most likely if anything does happen, he'll go right back to her. If you really don't care about any of them, GO FOR IT!!!

I will try to make this brief. My boyfriend of four years has a friend (Tom) who I have always thought was uh...delicious? Tom has a girlfriend. Over time he and I have become friends as well. Tom was always flirting with me but not publicly because his girlfriend would probably kick his butt or hit him with a frying pan or something. His girlfriend is very rude and overbearing and he has lost most of his friends because of her insulting them. He is afraid to leave her. About a year a bit ago we were at a party and he approached me and started to touch me. I should have stopped him from the start but I had these feelings as well so it was difficult to. This kept happening whenever we were at the same places. About 10 months ago he contacted me by e-mail and basically started to seduce me this way. I cannot plead innocence here because I have flirted back. I also admit that I like this attention from him because I have always liked him. Tom and his girlfriend don't hang around with us and our friends anymore because his girlfriend has alienated him with her attitude so I don't have to deal with him touching me. If I did, I know something bad would happen. My problem is, I think about him all the time. I visualize being with him both romantically and sexually. I don't know if I just want what I cannot have or what? I hate this. Someone please tell me what to do or think when he contacts me so I can be strong enough to deny these feelings. I know I am weak and I feel horrible about the whole situation. Please don't judge me. I need advice.