text from ex at 3 in the morning?!

[numberone]

Hello loveshack, I am very confused as what to do.My ex and I broke up in August have started to make contact again. She saw a picture of me and another girl and supposedly "it made her sick to her stomach" and want me back and miss me more. Honestly it was probably because the girl was pretty, and she knew that. Anyways, after I let her back in (so easily like an idiot) my ex told me she wanted to take it slow. Taking it slow then went down to no contact for a day, she wished me good luck on a test and that was about it.

 

After two full days of no contact she had the nerve to text me at 3:30 in the morning, asking " where are you right now ?"

 

What does this mean? Is she still trying to keep in touch with me or is she actually going to try and put in the effort this time?

 

Should I wait for her to reply one more time? Or should I reply?

 

I really need help with this one because I let her back in my life so easily, and this time i want to make sure she is willing to come back, and put in the effort.

 

But if i make her wait too long I am afraid she will run away.

 

please help me!!!!

[numberone]

does it mean shes still thinking about me? jealous that i may be with someone else, or just texting me for the hell of it. I mean there was no hey how are you, it was a straight "where are you right now?"

[Art_Critic]

Delete the text; block the number

 

She texted you at 3am... that in itself should tell you what to do, what a assclown she was being to you.

[numberone]

the last time we met up, she hugged me and kissed me in the morning when she woke up, always had her head on my chest. I think sometimes i pressured her too much ( iwas the clingy one who did everything, and didnt let her do part.) After I left her apartment, I felt so happy and encouraged that I would text her a lot, and then I realized she wanted to take it slow.

 

She texted me at 3:00 and it could mean she was thinking about me or not.

 

Also I got a few friend requests from her colllege, (girls that I know requested me) so she may think that I Was in town and not telling her, and upset

 

What all do you guys think?

 

I can't block her btw, I have verizon

[River Rain]

She was checking up on you. By not responding, you probably made her think you were hiding something - at least in her insecure point of view. That's how I see it. As for reply or not...it's up to you if you want to play games or not. I personally wouldn't leave anyone hanging if they contacted me, if I cared about them that is. Honest and direct is the only way to get genuine answers.

[numberone]

I want to reply to her, but how should I reply? I don't want to play games either but I really want to know for sure if she was trying to "check up on me" instead of just texting me to text me.

[River Rain]

Don't overthink it. Why not tell her what you've written on LS? That you didn't know how to respond to her? But why not call instead.

[numberone]

I would call her but then again, that shows that i'm just willing to let her slide right back in to my life again. I honestly think if I kept doing this i'll be a doormat, and she'll just walk out of my life as easy as she walked in it(because I let her.)

 

I'm gonna wait till noon to text her, and keep it short.

Should I reply by saying

 

"Wrong person?" or what?

 

 

Also now that I think about it, the night of halloween she knew i was going out to a party with other girls ( and she would text me saying to be careful and checking up on me) so maybe she is doing it now too, who knows she might really cares but I really wish I had some way of knowing for sure.

[River Rain]

I would call her but then again, that shows that i'm just willing to let her slide right back in to my life again. I honestly think if I kept doing this i'll be a doormat, and she'll just walk out of my life as easy as she walked in it(because I let her.)

 

I'm gonna wait till noon to text her, and keep it short.

Should I reply by saying

 

"Wrong person?" or what?

 

 

Also now that I think about it, the night of halloween she knew i was going out to a party with other girls ( and she would text me saying to be careful and checking up on me) so maybe she is doing it now too, who knows she might really cares but I really wish I had some way of knowing for sure.

 

The only way to know for sure is to talk to her and ask her. If you feel as though a telephone call = doormat, which I don't really understand, then don't call her. I don't think I can be any help to you, because I despise texting as a form of communication, but good luck. And don't ever be a doormat.

[numberone]

no you are a lot of help! I just replied at 12:01 "Did you mean to send that to me?"

-If she says yes, I'll just ask why? - then keep the convo light.

-If she says no i'll just ignore her.

[River Rain]

no you are a lot of help! I just replied at 12:01 "Did you mean to send that to me?"

-If she says yes, I'll just ask why? - then keep the convo light.

-If she says no i'll just ignore her.

 

Good plan Although talking would get your answers quicker and probably more genuine.

 

Third possibility, she ignores your text?

[aMguilts]

Good plan Although talking would get your answers quicker and probably more genuine.

 

Third possibility, she ignores your text?

 

my moneys on this one:o

 

Riverrain, listen. When an ex texts or calls you at 3am. 99 times out of a 100, they are drunk, didn`t pull at the club and are feeling very lonely and sorry for themselves. They will pick on the `weakest` person in their phonebook to make them feel better about themselves.

 

If she wanted you, she`d be with you now.

 

i reckon anyway

 

aMillion

[aMguilts]

She was checking up on you. By not responding, you probably made her think you were hiding something -.

 

Or even worse( in her insecure state of mind) that , god forbid, you have moved on with your life.

 

Which IMO is the best thing you should do.

 

aM

[M30USA]

Honestly it was probably because the girl was pretty, and she knew that

 

She should be LESS jealous that the girl is pretty. Girls who are average looking--let's just face it--seem to treat men a whole lot better and don't feel like the world owes them anything. I swear, if I ever remarry, I can truly say with 100% honesty that I will not base it primarily on looks. Why women get jealous over attractive women is beyond me. It's back a$$wards.

[aMguilts]

She should be LESS jealous that the girl is pretty. Girls who are average looking--let's just face it--seem to treat men a whole lot better and don't feel like the world owes them anything. I swear, if I ever remarry, I can truly say with 100% honesty that I will not base it primarily on looks. Why women get jealous over attractive women is beyond me. It's back a$$wards.

 

hi M30USA.

 

Boy, have you got a LOT to learn about the way women think!!!

 

good luck finding out!

 

aM

 

P.s riverrain i didn`t mean to put your nick at the start of my last post here, was meant for the OP..sorry

[numberone]

OKAY so here is the run around. She still likes me a lot.

Just talked to her, she called me after lunch.

 

She told me she is confused, and I asked why:

 

she states these reasons

 

-she doesn't understand why i didn't tell her i was in town for the last 3 days, and she thought it was shady ( i was giving her space, honestly )

-she didn't like what my friend posted on my wall about "another girl"

-she doesnt understand how I control how she feels.

 

 

-at the end she told me she needed to be mad at me, she admitted it was irrational and it doesnt make sense, but she is mad at me because I control her feelings, and she has never been in this type of situation before.

 

I told her in my defense, its not my fault, so im not gonna apologize.

 

Maybe you need to accept how I make you feel, because obviously your hurt for because you still care a lot. Just learn to accept it.

 

WHAT DO YOU GUYSY THINK!?!!

[River Rain]

OKAY so here is the run around. She still likes me a lot.

Just talked to her, she called me after lunch.

 

She told me she is confused, and I asked why:

 

she states these reasons

 

-she doesn't understand why i didn't tell her i was in town for the last 3 days, and she thought it was shady ( i was giving her space, honestly )

-she didn't like what my friend posted on my wall about "another girl"

-she doesnt understand how I control how she feels.

 

 

-at the end she told me she needed to be mad at me, she admitted it was irrational and it doesnt make sense, but she is mad at me because I control her feelings, and she has never been in this type of situation before.

 

I told her in my defense, its not my fault, so im not gonna apologize.

 

Maybe you need to accept how I make you feel, because obviously your hurt for because you still care a lot. Just learn to accept it.

 

WHAT DO YOU GUYSY THINK!?!!

 

Only she controls how she feels. Projecting anger on you for emotions she has is just immature and pretty unfair. It just sounds like you keep going back and forth...if it were me, I'd just walk away at this point, lots of drama.

[M30USA]

hi M30USA.

 

Boy, have you got a LOT to learn about the way women think!!!

 

good luck finding out!

 

aM

 

P.s riverrain i didn`t mean to put your nick at the start of my last post here, was meant for the OP..sorry

 

I know how they think, trust me. I was just saying they SHOULDN'T be jealous about an attractive new girl--since attractive women generally treat men worse. That's my point.

[aMguilts]

OKAY so here is the run around. She still likes me a lot.

Just talked to her, she called me after lunch.

 

She told me she is confused, and I asked why:

 

she states these reasons

 

-she doesn't understand why i didn't tell her i was in town for the last 3 days, and she thought it was shady ( i was giving her space, honestly )

-she didn't like what my friend posted on my wall about "another girl"

-she doesnt understand how I control how she feels.

 

 

-at the end she told me she needed to be mad at me, she admitted it was irrational and it doesnt make sense, but she is mad at me because I control her feelings, and she has never been in this type of situation before.

 

I told her in my defense, its not my fault, so im not gonna apologize.

 

Maybe you need to accept how I make you feel, because obviously your hurt for because you still care a lot. Just learn to accept it.

 

WHAT DO YOU GUYSY THINK!?!!

 

hey numberone.

 

hmmmm...what do I think?

 

I think that she`s just texting you to keep you on the back boiler.

 

I think that you need to forget about this girl and go and find one that really makes you happy.

 

i think you like this a girl a lot, but i also think what i said to you before.

 

i think if she wants to be with you, she`d be with you.

 

i think your a really great guy that doesn`t need to harrassed by a neurotic ex that only contacts you when she`s feeling down

 

well thats what I, think

 

aM

[River Rain]

P.s riverrain i didn`t mean to put your nick at the start of my last post here, was meant for the OP..sorry

 

No harm done

[aMguilts]

No harm done

 

thank you.

 

sorry for the TJ numberone

 

 

aM

[aMguilts]

I would never take a text I received at 3:30 am seriously, except seriously annoying.

 

I suppose the exception to that rule would be something along the lines of "I'm too drunk to drive, can you come get me?" or "My car broke down, can you help me?".

 

Those would be legitimate 3:30 am texts.

 

 

hello sadintexas.

 

i`m sorry i`m going to have to disagree.

"i`m too drunk to drive" @ ANYTIME in the day/night... get a taxi then?!!"

 

And as for this

" my car has broken down"...fix it then.

 

or call the breakdown service?

 

aM

[numberone]

I can't think of a more pathetic / needy response.

 

Do you think being pathetic, weak, needy, etc. builds attraction? Do you think her feeling sorry for you is going to make her want you back?

 

I don't get it, I really don't.

 

 

It got her to respond, and she called me back twice. I don't think that was being needy, or pathetic. In fact when I sent that she apologized for sending it saying I shouldn't of have sent that. She said that because she knew I replied out of disappointment.

 

After talking to her she broke down. She broke down because she saw a post of me being with another girl, and she couldn't handle it. When I told her I was in town for the last 3 days, and didn't tell her why she broke down even more. She said it made her sick to her stomach, that there are pictures of me and another girl and stuff on my facebook.

She mentioned that she was torturing herself every time she looked at my facebook.

 

I believe shes having a hard time dealing with her feelings since she is a very stubborn and naive girl. I told her she should have her space so she can figure things out. I think i did what was right and not "pathetic".

[numberone]

jealousy hurts her, but in the end, its up to her. I do want her back but not in this shape, which is why she needs her time to figure out what she wants. Whether its being with me or not.

[River Rain]

jealousy hurts her, but in the end, its up to her. I do want her back but not in this shape, which is why she needs her time to figure out what she wants. Whether its being with me or not.

 

That's exactly what NC is for. I hope she's able to take a step back, stop stalking your on FB and figure out what she really wants, without all the desperation. Good luck.