doowah Posted November 10, 2012 Share Posted November 10, 2012 We'd been together for 6 months. The first 4 months it was great. He made me believe it was possible to have a relationship while he was married. He's in an open marriage, so his wife knew about it. The last two months it was all gone. I wanted to give him time, he didn't want to stop it. He said he was just busy and lots of things happening in his life. But he shut me out completely. We still send each other messages every day, but this week it was enough. I sent him an email telling him I don't want to continue like this, that it stops here. He's never responded so fast as this time. But all just words, no actions. I'm done with the words. I'm going to be strong and not respond. Just this. Just convincing myself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mount Posted November 10, 2012 Share Posted November 10, 2012 So were you asking him about something....? What do you mean by shutting me out as you two do send msgs though? We'd been together for 6 months. The first 4 months it was great. He made me believe it was possible to have a relationship while he was married. He's in an open marriage, so his wife knew about it. The last two months it was all gone. I wanted to give him time, he didn't want to stop it. He said he was just busy and lots of things happening in his life. But he shut me out completely. We still send each other messages every day, but this week it was enough. I sent him an email telling him I don't want to continue like this, that it stops here. He's never responded so fast as this time. But all just words, no actions. I'm done with the words. I'm going to be strong and not respond. Just this. Just convincing myself. Link to post Share on other sites
Author doowah Posted November 10, 2012 Author Share Posted November 10, 2012 No, I wasn't asking him anything. He just didn't tell me much about his life and what was happening. The messages were superficial, nothing personal. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted November 10, 2012 Share Posted November 10, 2012 No, I wasn't asking him anything. He just didn't tell me much about his life and what was happening. The messages were superficial, nothing personal. It seems that you wanted more from him and he wasn't willing to share his personal life. That he is/was looking for fun and not another 'relationship' per say. Anyway, if you can't handle it and it's obvious that you couldn't, it's good you ended it. Grieve the loss and find a guy who will fulfill all your needs, not just bits and pieces. Besides, this guy would never leave his wife for you - Hense the open marriage thing, so it is possible he felt to keep things lighter, not to get attached to you. He knew you were very attached to him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author doowah Posted November 10, 2012 Author Share Posted November 10, 2012 Maybe I wanted more. We had more and it all of a sudden stopped. That was my main frustration. It wasn't a matter of being able to handle it, it was a matter of self-respect. I wasn't going to be there for him just when he felt like it. That was not how we started this thing. I never wanted him to leave his wife. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted November 10, 2012 Share Posted November 10, 2012 Maybe I wanted more. We had more and it all of a sudden stopped. That was my main frustration. It wasn't a matter of being able to handle it, it was a matter of self-respect. I wasn't going to be there for him just when he felt like it. That was not how we started this thing. I never wanted him to leave his wife. The thing is, like it or not, he has every right to change his mind along the way. Open marriage relationships eventually end. He probably sensed you were falling in love with him and this is why he backed off. To you maybe it was more than it was to him. It's good you ended it. I hope you heal well and find a guy who can let go and let himself fall in love with you as well. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author doowah Posted November 10, 2012 Author Share Posted November 10, 2012 He absolutely had every right to change his mind, just like me. He just didn't have the right to not tell me about that, even after me repeatedly asking him. I was ready to let him go, but he didn't want that. That's why I 'waited' for 2 months. Link to post Share on other sites
sad puppy Posted November 10, 2012 Share Posted November 10, 2012 Right on, stay strong! Good for you not to waste anymore of your time. Link to post Share on other sites
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