hdvries86 Posted November 10, 2012 Share Posted November 10, 2012 Hi there, My ex and me split up a few months ago. We had an relationship of 2.5 years. I know she has moved on so I don't make any chance of winning her back. I'm just curious to know if anyone of you did a surprise for your ex and win her back? I know i'm to late so i'm just curious. Don't want to do anything myself. Greetings, Henk Link to post Share on other sites
Liz2012 Posted November 10, 2012 Share Posted November 10, 2012 Why are you asking if you don't want to do this?? Link to post Share on other sites
Author hdvries86 Posted November 10, 2012 Author Share Posted November 10, 2012 Well to tell you the truth I was pulling off an surprise for my ex-girlfriend. But I didn't do it and wanted to know if it had worked anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
Liz2012 Posted November 10, 2012 Share Posted November 10, 2012 I've heard of grand gestures working, but they have to be WORTHY and mean something to that person. Something cute and silly - fine - it may pull heart strings but if depends on why the relationship ended as to whether it will create a big bang comeback. honestly it depends on your situation and how it ended, what you have done so far etc... Link to post Share on other sites
Author hdvries86 Posted November 10, 2012 Author Share Posted November 10, 2012 My relationship ended pretty bad this is why i didn't take any action to win her back with a surprise. We had constant arguing and I did hurt her feelings. She doesn't believe that I really like her the way I say I do afterwords. She moved out and she looks really happy right now because she can live her life the way she wants. So getting her back even with a grant gesture wouldn't work. I wrote her a love letter and what I heard she did tear it apart. The idea I had to surprise her was to take her to disneyland. She allways wanted to be treated like a princess, andalso had a tattoo of a crown. So my idea was to meet her over there and give her a crown and tell her she is a reall princess. That i've talked with some people on how to work on my problems and read books about the things I could do better. But in the end if she doesn't want to I need to leave her alone. Link to post Share on other sites
SpiderLove Posted November 10, 2012 Share Posted November 10, 2012 My relationship ended pretty bad this is why i didn't take any action to win her back with a surprise. We had constant arguing and I did hurt her feelings. She doesn't believe that I really like her the way I say I do afterwords. She moved out and she looks really happy right now because she can live her life the way she wants. So getting her back even with a grant gesture wouldn't work. I wrote her a love letter and what I heard she did tear it apart. The idea I had to surprise her was to take her to disneyland. She allways wanted to be treated like a princess, andalso had a tattoo of a crown. So my idea was to meet her over there and give her a crown and tell her she is a reall princess. That i've talked with some people on how to work on my problems and read books about the things I could do better. But in the end if she doesn't want to I need to leave her alone. That sounds romantic. But maybe she needs to feel secure that whatever messed up for the two of you has changed. And I think that it's also important that she still has feelings and respect for you. Sometimes trying reel someone in by doing something pretty bazaar works, but sometimes it could be a disaster. A guy once got my friend something veeery expensive to win her heart and she felt completely bad because she totally did not like him at all. She also felt creeped out. Link to post Share on other sites
dhcp Posted November 11, 2012 Share Posted November 11, 2012 While normally the romantic, I'm going advise that you tread very carefully here, these sort of things have a 99% chance of going wrong and being unwelcome and a 1% of being absolutely amazing and winning them back like a fairytale. If she is with someone new and happy now it could make for a really awkward reveal.... I'm all for you, just be really careful, it's uber-high risk. Link to post Share on other sites
NavyAirTraffic Posted November 11, 2012 Share Posted November 11, 2012 You win your ex back with a surprise and she leaves a week later because the euphoria of the surprise goes away, and the reason you broke up in the first place resurfaces. You won't get the response you're looking for here. Those Hollywood endings are just that, fantasy. Link to post Share on other sites
blue_jay_bird Posted November 11, 2012 Share Posted November 11, 2012 (edited) Surprise your ex, by not giving a **** (that is if you dumped her) I was just talking with a girl that dumped her 3 year relationship. She didn't seem to give a ****. She talked and laughed, like it was nothing. I bet you the guy was crazy about her. She already was in love again. ..think about it. Edited November 11, 2012 by blue_jay_bird Link to post Share on other sites
Author hdvries86 Posted November 11, 2012 Author Share Posted November 11, 2012 While normally the romantic, I'm going advise that you tread very carefully here, these sort of things have a 99% chance of going wrong and being unwelcome and a 1% of being absolutely amazing and winning them back like a fairytale. If she is with someone new and happy now it could make for a really awkward reveal.... I'm all for you, just be really careful, it's uber-high risk. Yeah your right it will have a 1 % chance and its more than nothing I guess. But the truth it I know she will feel really akward about it. But she really thinks I didn't give as much about HER and just want to be with SOMEONE. I just gotta proof that it was HER i loved and not just beeing with someone. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hdvries86 Posted November 11, 2012 Author Share Posted November 11, 2012 Surprise your ex, by not giving a **** (that is if you dumped her) I was just talking with a girl that dumped her 3 year relationship. She didn't seem to give a ****. She talked and laughed, like it was nothing. I bet you the guy was crazy about her. She already was in love again. ..think about it. She was the one who dumped me. We had constant arguing because I was really a stuborn guy who couldn't give her what she wanted. She really loved pink for you to have an idea and I didn't want the pink stuff in my living room. I was to stuborn to admit to her wishes. ATM I don't really give a **** if she comes back and paints my whole house pink LOL. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hdvries86 Posted November 11, 2012 Author Share Posted November 11, 2012 You win your ex back with a surprise and she leaves a week later because the euphoria of the surprise goes away, and the reason you broke up in the first place resurfaces. You won't get the response you're looking for here. Those Hollywood endings are just that, fantasy. That's so true, i can't hold down my imagination on doing a hollywood ending myself. My mind is so full of ideas what to do but I know deep down I can't win her back. So what i'm gonna do is sent her a letter. I know she doesn't want to read it because she isn't really open to me right now. So I have some mail left from her over here. So I'm gonna open one mail and put a note of myself in it so she will open it. Than i'm gonna put a letter in it with what I was gonna surprise with her but tell her I don't know if she'd liked it. So I will put 2 tickets in it for disneyland and tell her hey i'm really sorry and just go out and have some fun. She won't feel akward and any pressure. I let her know that I still care about her and don't want to put her into anything she doesn't want to. Link to post Share on other sites
Minadee Posted November 11, 2012 Share Posted November 11, 2012 That's so true, i can't hold down my imagination on doing a hollywood ending myself. My mind is so full of ideas what to do but I know deep down I can't win her back. So what i'm gonna do is sent her a letter. I know she doesn't want to read it because she isn't really open to me right now. So I have some mail left from her over here. So I'm gonna open one mail and put a note of myself in it so she will open it. Than i'm gonna put a letter in it with what I was gonna surprise with her but tell her I don't know if she'd liked it. So I will put 2 tickets in it for disneyland and tell her hey i'm really sorry and just go out and have some fun. She won't feel akward and any pressure. I let her know that I still care about her and don't want to put her into anything she doesn't want to. Hi there OP I'm sure my opinion isn't valid as you seem to have made your mind up, but maybe you should think before sending her the tickets. You know her better than I do, but will that really make her happy? Or will she just think you are being desperate? I've just literally come out from a very desperate place, where even when the @$$hole of a boyfriend left me after 3 years I rushed over there when he hurt himself with a bag of all his favourite things, at first he was suprised but after that night of passion and love was over it was right back to "this doesnt mean we are getting together." So unless you are very financially stable, don't go spending a lot of money on something she might find to be too much. I think it can work but you need a little time apart. To get your head clear and if you believe that will be the best thing to do, none of us here on LS can stop you. Last year when the ex originally left me, I did NC for about 2 months, then a day before his birthday I was on the bus and I suddenly had to get off. I went to town and bought a card and filled the entire pages with how I felt and two months from that we were back together. Mind you, it was only for about 9 months as he has left me again exactly one year later. To the exact date, I kid you not. I'm not sure if i'll see him on his birthday this year, probably not, but who knows how I will feel in a couple of months. I wish you well OP, just make sure you know what you're doing. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hdvries86 Posted November 11, 2012 Author Share Posted November 11, 2012 Hi there, Actually to tell you the truth I really don't know what she's gonna do. I don't see it as a way to get back together but more as an appreciation for the time we spent together. I saved money which she didn't know of to ask her to marry me. So I will use that money to buy the surprise. My mind is saying no, don't do it, my heart says just do it and see what happens. She is allready gone so it won't make any difference if she likes it or not. Maybe she'll think of me as the crazy ex-boyfriend, but so be it? When I move on without doing anything about it maybe i'll regret it the rest of my life. If I know i've done everything to make her happy again I can continue moving on without asking myself: what if I did it? Or does this sound stupid to you? Greetings, Henk Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted November 11, 2012 Share Posted November 11, 2012 This is a bad idea. Do not do it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hdvries86 Posted November 11, 2012 Author Share Posted November 11, 2012 Ok I think i'm warned enough to not do it. Man this girl is so special I should have been better for her. Now it's to late and I can't do anything about it anymore. When I do this she will run even further away from me I guess. We'll never know if I don't do it but I think its the best to just let her go. I just can't somehow, I think she really is the girl of my dreams. The problem is I'm not her boy of her dreams, 2 sad :(. I just want a second chance but it won't happen. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hdvries86 Posted November 11, 2012 Author Share Posted November 11, 2012 (edited) All the sites relate different on giving a grand gesture: Site #1: Fact #3: You can’t persuade her to come back. Many have taken this approach and even more have failed. And since you’re reading this article it’s safe to assume that you too have tread down this path. So heed my word of warning: stop what you’re doing now! The only thing you can hope to accomplish with persuasion is to push her further away. And this makes total sense if you take a moment to think about what she ultimately wants: space. So do your due diligence and give it to her, and in turn she’ll reward you several fold in the very near future. Site #2: Grand Gestures You could always opt for a recreation of the infamous Say Anything scene, but you might lose points for unoriginality. Still, if a grand romantic gesture is what's in order, try hiring a sky writer to write your plea in the clouds, or run an ad in her local newspaper asking for another chance. You could also mail her a letter each day listing one reason why she should give you another shot, or learn to cook her favorite meal and invite her over for a romantic dinner. Site #3: (actually for girls) Make a statement. If you try the above and still can't seem to win him back, you may have to make a grand gesture. The grand gesture is the pull-out-all-the-stops, hold-a-boom-box-up-to-his-bedroom-window last chance for love. You have the advantage of knowing this guy well, so play into the way he communicates. If he's an intellectual guy, write him a letter spilling all your feelings for him. If he's the more physical type, show up at his door in a raincoat with a black bra and panty set underneath. (And if all else fails, bake him brownies. No guy can resist 'em.) Site #4: Romantic movies almost always have the same plot line - the couple meets, gets together, and breaks up. In the last scene, one of the characters (usually the guy) does some grand romantic gesture that ultimately wins his love back. If you've broken up with your girlfriend and want to get back together with her, you may be wondering if you should think about doing something big like that. After all, it always works for the hero in the movie. Stop right there. There are many reasons why you should avoid doing this. Site #5: Make a grand gesture. Show that you are sorry by doing something your ex always wanted you to do. Book that trip to Italy. Get the haircut she wanted you to get. Start going to school again. Show her that you've changed. Site #6: If your girlfriend left you, because you didn’t treat her with respect and hurt her feelings multiple times, ignoring her or making her jealous won’t do you any good. Your best course of action would be to apologize sincerely and try to win her forgiveness by doing a grand romantic gesture that she would never think you are capable of. If you are not romantic kind of guy and you have troubles coming up with creative ideas, browse Internet for some romantic ideas. Don’t expect the woman that you love to forgive you immediately. It is not so easy to win back your woman’s trust, when she has been hurt before. She has to be sure that things will be different and that you won’t repeat the same mistakes again. Prove to her that you deserve a second chance by being gentle, patient, understanding and caring. She needs your attention and your love! Good luck! Site #7: Without a doubt you'll get nowhere if you don't stop and think about what you're doing. Running around making grand gestures, as many do, is a quick way to losing your ex girlfriend for good. So if you've been sending designer perfume, booking romantic meals out, you need to stop that now and reflect. Edited November 11, 2012 by hdvries86 Link to post Share on other sites
21flames Posted November 11, 2012 Share Posted November 11, 2012 I might surprise my ex.........By sending her a turd in the mail! Link to post Share on other sites
Author hdvries86 Posted November 11, 2012 Author Share Posted November 11, 2012 Maybe that's the next romantic thing i'm gonna do ! Link to post Share on other sites
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