xxoo Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 I still can't get over the fact that you have no interest in learning the fat girls' names, or asking about their weekend. I really don't think that's normal, SD. If nothing else, it speaks to your social issues. Do you also have zero interest in learning men's names, or hearing about their weekend? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lonely Ronin Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 I really don't think that's normal, SD. If nothing else, it speaks to your social issues. Do you also have zero interest in learning men's names, or hearing about their weekend? This SD is a significant part of your problem. You have on several occasions stated in one way or another that you don't want to put any effort into anything that doesn't benefit you. Everyone notices this type of behavior, everyone...... I have a new coworker, he's been with the company a little over 2 months, and he has already become isolated, because he is this way. No one (male or female) wants to work with him, or talk with him. And he is a Damn good looking guy in his late 20's. One of my very attractive, & very funny female co-workers said it best at happy hour one night. "He is what he has........." It took a few moments but eventually everyone was rolling. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ThaWholigan Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 This SD is a significant part of your problem. You have on several occasions stated in one way or another that you don't want to put any effort into anything that doesn't benefit you. Everyone notices this type of behavior, everyone...... Except that it would benefit him but he doesn't realize that. I have no more advice to give to SD to be honest, it always come back to the same sh*t . I'm better off waiting until he's actually in a scenario that I can give him tips but I cannot be general. Link to post Share on other sites
Author somedude81 Posted November 17, 2012 Author Share Posted November 17, 2012 I still can't get over the fact that you have no interest in learning the fat girls' names, or asking about their weekend. I really don't think that's normal, SD. If nothing else, it speaks to your social issues. Do you also have zero interest in learning men's names, or hearing about their weekend? This SD is a significant part of your problem. You have on several occasions stated in one way or another that you don't want to put any effort into anything that doesn't benefit you. Everyone notices this type of behavior, everyone...... I have a new coworker, he's been with the company a little over 2 months, and he has already become isolated, because he is this way. No one (male or female) wants to work with him, or talk with him. And he is a Damn good looking guy in his late 20's. One of my very attractive, & very funny female co-workers said it best at happy hour one night. "He is what he has........." It took a few moments but eventually everyone was rolling. Ok, do you guys know what you're getting at here. It's like you're trying to paint me as some unsocial guy who doesn't talk to anybody. That's obviously not the case. When I'm in class, I'm always talking to somebody. As I have said countless times, I'm an introvert. So if I have to make the effort to talk to somebody and learn more about them, damn right it's going to be with somebody I'm at least somewhat interested in. Link to post Share on other sites
threebyfate Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 So yes, I'd rather be single than be with a woman I have zero attraction to. I'm not desperate enough to make myself and another person suffer through a horrible relationship.Couldn't agree with you more that it's futile to settle. But I do have to challenge your position. If it's okay for you not to settle for women who you're not attracted to, why isn't it okay for women not to settle for men who they're not attracted to? One more question. If your BMI is 24.3, are you attracted to women who have a similar BMI? Say a woman is 5'4" and 141 lbs (BMI 24.2), would you consider her attractive or obese? Link to post Share on other sites
Lonely Ronin Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 Ok, do you guys know what you're getting at here. It's like you're trying to paint me as some unsocial guy who doesn't talk to anybody. That's obviously not the case. When I'm in class, I'm always talking to somebody. Your not being honest with yourself man, what your doing has no effect on me or TW, or xxoo. You are being rude/unsocial, rather you realize it or not. Don't forget I salsa as well, and unless it's so loud in the class or at the club that you can't hear each other, it's considered rude not to ask a woman your dancing with her name. Usually it's works in one of 2 ways: 1. hi, my names "blank" she will impulsively tell you hers unless she is socially awkward 2. hi, whats your name? she will tell you and you respond with mines "blank" Link to post Share on other sites
threebyfate Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 One more question. If your BMI is 24.3, are you attracted to women who have a similar BMI? Say a woman is 5'4" and 141 lbs (BMI 24.2), would you consider her attractive or obese?To add to this question, this woman has a BMI of 24.2 which is a lower BMI than you have. http://www.vivinlinea.com/Images/weight-loss-long-island-results/weight-loss-long-island-maintenance-eB05.jpg Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 Ok, do you guys know what you're getting at here. It's like you're trying to paint me as some unsocial guy who doesn't talk to anybody. That's obviously not the case. When I'm in class, I'm always talking to somebody. As I have said countless times, I'm an introvert. So if I have to make the effort to talk to somebody and learn more about them, damn right it's going to be with somebody I'm at least somewhat interested in. Do you mean "sexually interested in"? Why are you not generally interested in women who are not sexually attractive to you? Why should women pay any interest in you if they are not sexually interested based solely on your appearance? Link to post Share on other sites
GirlontheLam Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 To add to this question, this woman has a BMI of 24.2 which is a lower BMI than you have. http://www.vivinlinea.com/Images/weight-loss-long-island-results/weight-loss-long-island-maintenance-eB05.jpg Well it is always fun to reference this website. Here are some women who are 5'4 and 160. Search by Height, Weight - My Body Gallery - What Real Women Look Like Link to post Share on other sites
dasein Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 One more question. If your BMI is 24.3, are you attracted to women who have a similar BMI? Say a woman is 5'4" and 141 lbs (BMI 24.2), would you consider her attractive or obese? BMI is valuable in individual assessments only as a politeness for doctors who don't want to come out and say how fat their patient is. It also has limited applicability to nutrition trends in large national populations. It is not at all useful in comparing the physical condition of two individual human beings due to its many, well-documented, indisputable flaws. This is scientific fact, yet you keep making posts referencing BMI numbers when you want to draw a certain conclusion. Link to post Share on other sites
ThaWholigan Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 Well it is always fun to reference this website. Here are some women who are 5'4 and 160. Search by Height, Weight - My Body Gallery - What Real Women Look Like Top left, top right and second row right :love: Link to post Share on other sites
Author somedude81 Posted November 17, 2012 Author Share Posted November 17, 2012 Couldn't agree with you more that it's futile to settle. But I do have to challenge your position. If it's okay for you not to settle for women who you're not attracted to, why isn't it okay for women not to settle for men who they're not attracted to? I don't have an issue with women only wanting guys they are attracted to. My problem is that most women are only attracted to a very small percentage of men. A percentage that I regretfully admit that am not part of, and most likely never will be no matter how much effort I put in. One more question. If your BMI is 24.3, are you attracted to women who have a similar BMI? Say a woman is 5'4" and 141 lbs (BMI 24.2), would you consider her attractive or obese?I really can't tell anything about a woman just by the numbers unless it was significantly above average. I know that somebody 5'4, 170 would look obese but I'd need to see 5'4, 141 in person to tell if she looks fat. BTW, male BMI is almost completely worthless. I have a significant amount of muscle that makes me heavier than a man my height should be, plus a bit of a gut that won't go away. Ideally, I want to be bigger with more muscle. I could probably get to 165 and look pretty good. Link to post Share on other sites
GirlontheLam Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 Oddly I have the opposite problem. At least 50% of the men that approach me are pretty skinny. Skinny tall, Skinny short... And I like bigger guys. And I am not small (I am an hourglassy US 14). Link to post Share on other sites
dasein Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 SD, a sasquatch in my backyard cavorting with a unicorn and a leprechaun told me some woman somewhere is in better shape than you. Any response you have to bigfoot's sterling reasoning simply must be an excuse. Stop making excuses, listen what the sasquatch says, and just admit you are wrong already! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author somedude81 Posted November 17, 2012 Author Share Posted November 17, 2012 This is just an excuse. Refer to above post with inserted picture. This woman has a lower BMI than you do. Do you consider her too fat for you? And another excuse. Excuse for what? For the picture, refer to what I said in bold. Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 SD, are you basically saying that you are so introverted that you are disinterested in friendships, outside of women you want to have sex with? Link to post Share on other sites
threebyfate Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 Excuse for what? For the picture, refer to what I said in bold.This is the answer to your question. That you prefer women who are thinner than yourself. While that's not a crime, instead of blaming women for preferring someone other than yourself, look to your own standards and accept that if you prefer women who are thinner, it's going to take awhile to find someone. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author somedude81 Posted November 17, 2012 Author Share Posted November 17, 2012 SD, are you basically saying that you are so introverted that you are disinterested in friendships, outside of women you want to have sex with? I'm not talking about friendship in this thread. This is the answer to your question. That you prefer women who are thinner than yourself. While that's not a crime, instead of blaming women for preferring someone other than yourself, look to your own standards and accept that if you prefer women who are thinner, it's going to take awhile to find someone. Uh, I'm pretty sure that about 95% of men prefer a woman thinner than themselves. Men are supposed to be bigger than women! As a man who is not obese, why should I have to lower my standards to include women who are? Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 I'm not talking about friendship in this thread. Neither am I. I'm trying to understand how you interact with people, and how women you are interested in view you. You have to understand, these women gets lots of male attention, and they are used to how men act. The loner guy is going to stand out, and not in a good way. Link to post Share on other sites
Lonely Ronin Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 I'm not talking about friendship in this thread. That's a mistake, because most happy couples are very good friends. They have stuff they like to do together besides having sex. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Leigh 87 Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 Some dude, No, you do not have to settle for chicks you have no attraction to. And no, it is unlikely you will be single for many years to come, if your an educated guy who is not terribly ugly. Your not necessarily destined to a life of fat chicks or nothing at all. The only variable here, is how long it will take you to be attractive and appealing enough to women in general, for women your attracted to to respond to you. I was not at all attractive to men so I changed myself; got rid of the acne and terrible skin, worked out, ate better.... I also had a major personality over haul - I changed into a very positive, up beat person; much more people liked me, sexually and otherwise. So.... Perhaps consider the way you come across to the world, and try to be more positive and self confident? Link to post Share on other sites
ThaWholigan Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 Some dude, No, you do not have to settle for chicks you have no attraction to. And no, it is unlikely you will be single for many years to come, if your an educated guy who is not terribly ugly. Your not necessarily destined to a life of fat chicks or nothing at all. The only variable here, is how long it will take you to be attractive and appealing enough to women in general, for women your attracted to to respond to you. I was not at all attractive to men so I changed myself; got rid of the acne and terrible skin, worked out, ate better.... I also had a major personality over haul - I changed into a very positive, up beat person; much more people liked me, sexually and otherwise. So.... Perhaps consider the way you come across to the world, and try to be more positive and self confident? It's like robot wars, or even football (soccer). In Robot Wars, the robots usually had one weapon of choice - some had razors, flippers, lances, some even the very shape was a weapon. But they always had some kind of mechanism that was unorthodox in helping them win. When you have a squad, it helps if there is a general ethos or style of play that the whole team adopts - but it always helps to have that unorthodox secret weapon option in the squad to put in the team when needed. I'm a big Arsenal fan, and Wenger the manager has a squad that is quite straightforward with his principles of passing football. However, he has the curve ball that is Theo Walcott, the fastest player in football. He's not great at passing, but he stretches games by his sheer pace, and he's also a decent finisher so he punishes teams by using the space behind defenders - and nobody can catch him. It helps when developing tactics against the opposition. I digress..... Somedude reiterates that he is an introvert and all that, but he doesn't seem to have that curveball option, that mechanism that enables him to adapt in certain situations if needed. He doesn't seem to really want to get that mechanism anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
threebyfate Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 Uh, I'm pretty sure that about 95% of men prefer a woman thinner than themselves. Men are supposed to be bigger than women! As a man who is not obese, why should I have to lower my standards to include women who are?If you wish to apply higher standards to women than what you're holding yourself and other men to, this is your prerogative. But higher standard requirements will take some time to never going to happen, to find a woman who's has lower standards, at least as it relates to the physical. Now if you have a killer personality, a positive attitude, a great sense of humour and confidence to burn, then the physical is less likely to matter to women. Link to post Share on other sites
Author somedude81 Posted November 17, 2012 Author Share Posted November 17, 2012 Neither am I. I'm trying to understand how you interact with people, and how women you are interested in view you. You have to understand, these women gets lots of male attention, and they are used to how men act. The loner guy is going to stand out, and not in a good way. I definitely understand that girls get lots of male attention. So I figure that my attention to them has very little impact. Though as I said before, I think that that bigger girls get less male attention and maybe that might lead to them lowering their standards to include men like me. I don't stand out as the loner guy. That's a mistake, because most happy couples are very good friends. They have stuff they like to do together besides having sex. Who said they didn't?! Of course I want to be good friends with somebody I'm in a relationship with! Have you not seen my many previous threads where I talked about a girl that I considered to be my best friend and I was also completely obsessed with her and there was nothing else in the world that I wanted more than for her to be my girlfriend? Link to post Share on other sites
ThaWholigan Posted November 17, 2012 Share Posted November 17, 2012 I don't stand out as the loner guy. Maybe that could be a problem, maybe you don't stand out at all... Link to post Share on other sites
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