alexa137 Posted November 22, 2012 Share Posted November 22, 2012 how do you respond to exs wishing happy birthday or happy thanksgiving?? ignore? respond? my ex texted me happy bday 2 weeks after we broke i responded "ty" have had no contact in 5 weeks and now he just texted me happy thanksgiving ugh! how do you handle this? dont want to be rude but why when 5 weeks ago you told me you didnt want me to call you, text you, visit you no contact and that i was deleting his number and he was going to also well obviously not! smh! why bother? leave me alone Link to post Share on other sites
PYTpisces Posted November 22, 2012 Share Posted November 22, 2012 Entirely up to you. You can give a polite thank you. A thank you and request to stop sending messages like this to you or you can ignore and he will eventually get the point after being greeted by a closed door over and over Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexa137 Posted November 23, 2012 Author Share Posted November 23, 2012 well i responded because im not mean or ignorant but it then turned into a min arguement- after i responded "same to you" he said "whatever, its cool! i replied "remember YOU said no contact, he says "yup cool!!!(i know this is reply kinda mean he was mad maybe) so i responded " so whats the point?" he replies " my bad, I was just trying to be civil!!! i reply " better not worry" him:"yup" me:"why be considerate and act like you care now?!" him: nevermind....just forget, my last reply:" sorry if i seem mean but its not good for me" really, i mean if you tell me dont contact him why would he contact me? it was over a month and i just started doing better and not thinking about him as much, you know out of sight, out of mind and now he had to mess with my head. not good! it pisses me off! leave me alone, you dont want me and you said that clearly by saying;"youre everything i dont want" which hurt me feelings alot! I think its possible he might of seen me walking at the outlets last night with another guy(hes just a friend that recently moved here and i was showing him around the area) not for sure though he was about 50 feet away working(hes an UPS driver sorry i dont have anyone to talk to about this and trying to deal with this breakup, just so hard Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted November 23, 2012 Share Posted November 23, 2012 I got a text from my ex to wish me happy thanksgiving too. It's nice but its annoying in a way. But actually I thought about wishing it to him all day too but I just didn't. I'm glad I wasn't the annoying one. Link to post Share on other sites
Pompom Posted November 23, 2012 Share Posted November 23, 2012 "Thanks, to you too." Unless one parted on bad terms, does one really have to insist on treating the ex like a homicidal maniac out to get you? Link to post Share on other sites
Exit Posted November 23, 2012 Share Posted November 23, 2012 (edited) well i responded because im not mean or ignorant but it then turned into a min arguement- after i responded "same to you" he said "whatever, its cool! i replied "remember YOU said no contact, he says "yup cool!!!(i know this is reply kinda mean he was mad maybe) so i responded " so whats the point?" he replies " my bad, I was just trying to be civil!!! i reply " better not worry" him:"yup" me:"why be considerate and act like you care now?!" him: nevermind....just forget, my last reply:" sorry if i seem mean but its not good for me" really, i mean if you tell me dont contact him why would he contact me? it was over a month and i just started doing better and not thinking about him as much, you know out of sight, out of mind and now he had to mess with my head. not good! it pisses me off! leave me alone, you dont want me and you said that clearly by saying;"youre everything i dont want" which hurt me feelings alot! I think its possible he might of seen me walking at the outlets last night with another guy(hes just a friend that recently moved here and i was showing him around the area) not for sure though he was about 50 feet away working(hes an UPS driver sorry i dont have anyone to talk to about this and trying to deal with this breakup, just so hard Lol that conversation between the two of you sounds so incredibly immature. Mostly on his behalf, as the conversation should have just been over after you said "same to you". Now you know why it's better not to answer and it has nothing to do with "I'm not mean or ignorant". It's about having the self respect to realize you're just walking into a messy trap when you bother to respond to messages from an ex. Here's an idea, and sorry to burst the bubble of "playing victim" that all of us dumpees enjoy being in, but you can take control of the NC situation. Block him, rather than letting it mess with your head every time he wants to text you for a holiday. The relationship is over, being in touch with him is just causing stress, it certainly failed miserably at any attempt to "be civil", so rather than wait for the very same thing to happen for Christmas, New Year's, and every holiday after that, why don't you take the initiative and just block him. You can take control of NC right now and make sure he isn't able to ruin it anymore. But taking that responsibility suddenly means we can't use that excuse anymore that THEY contacted US. So it ruins our little game of self pity. So it's up to you, do you want it to continue, or do you want to commit to NC and make sure you don't have to have a text message argument with him for Christmas too? It's like being a smoker and complaining about lung cancer and then lighting your next cigarette, or complaining about how hard it is to lose weight while eating a piece of cake. YOU could stop it from happening with your own will power rather than letting it happen and then complaining about the after effects. Edited November 23, 2012 by Exit Link to post Share on other sites
Author alexa137 Posted November 24, 2012 Author Share Posted November 24, 2012 well he replied awhile ago(after a day!, smh!) "understandable, sorry so hopefully he will get the hint! if you dont like me and dont want me in your life leave me alone! i dont know how to block him from my cell phone, he has been deleted the day after he told me he was done with me, he doesnt go backwards and he wanted me to not contact him etc...he told me he was going to delete my number also but i dont think he did since he texted me for my bday and thanksgiving I just dont understand men! you have a good woman and because of me being worried about you and caring he breaks up with me! what kind of bs is that?> yes im still mad and kinda hate him for leading me on for 4 months and making me think that he liked me a lot and was into me(wanting to see me everyday) whatever! ugh grow up! maybe he regrets it and misses me??!! haha i hope so! Link to post Share on other sites
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