24 year old brother thinks he's cute by scream gibberish like a baby

[Drivenmad]

I have a brother who is a year older than I. At the moment he is 24 and he will be turning 25 in Nov. I'm sick of him. I am sick of the fact that he cannot mature. For one, for one reason or another, he keeps failing out of school. He majors in engineering. I understand that his schedule must be quite difficult, however, he has repeated the same course at least 3x now, and he still cannot pass that repeated class. But, his school work is besides the point. I wish that I had a hidden camera in my house, so I can actually tape his behavior and show what a fool he's been acting. As I said, he is nearly 25, however he still has a mentality of a 10 year old. He refused to find a job, when he knows that our family is in a financial crisis. He mooches on others, and when any of us dares to ask him for a favor, he would use that against us and he will take it to his grave. But, then again.. that is besides the point. I honestly am sick of looking at him. His face is quite sensitive to the sun or certain foods for some reason, which caused his face to create an allergic reaction. He has patches of redness all across his face, and on top of that, his face is flooded with pimples.. but has recently gotten a little better. I'm sick of looking at all that redness on his face, and the sick jokes he tries to pull. When we were little, I remember my brother and I would play this game, where I was to play the baby, and he the older brother. He, obviously never gotten over that stage. When my mother comes home from work, he would start yelling and screaming at the top of his lungs in a "cute baby" voice. He would try to speak with his severely broken chinese with my mom, and a lot of things just doesn't make sense. Since he only knows a few words, he would constantly repeat that same phrase over and over, even if it doesn't make sense. Good Lord, then when my dad comes home, he would act even worse. My dad comes home pretty late from work, close to 10pm. By that hour, my mother has passed out.. and God forbids my brother leaves her alone to nap in peace. Most of the time, he would rub his face against hers, to wake her up.. constantly wanting attention, like a 5 year old child. My mother would yell at him to act his age, however, he would act even more childesh and stupid.. and yet again.. yell at the top of his lungs with that baby voice imitation. Yes, and when my dad finally comes home, he would wake my mother, even though she would be asleep, just to announce that dad is home. I'm thinking, can't he just let her sleep in peace?? Good Lord.

 

I cannot stand living with him anymore, and I cannot stand him trying to act like a baby. We both share a bedroom, and whenever he is the first to wakeup on weekends, he would yell at the top of his lungs.. imitating a baby's cry, and waking all of us up. Now, is that a behavior of a 25 year old?? The sick part is, he really thinks that he is cute whenever he behaves that way. He wears contacts, but around the house he is too lazy to wear them, and his glasses. Since his vision is pretty bad, and he cannot see certain things clearly, he would stick his entire face as close as possible to any object, any thing, AND any PERSON for that matter. Now, that really annoys the **** out of me, because that just makes him look more idiotic!

 

I thought that by him dorming in college, he would learn to mature. Boy, was I dead wrong. I don't understand him. He only acts this way when he is around family. Strangers thinks that he is a normal boy.. that is why I wish that I could just tape his behavior, just to make him see the fool he is trying to portray.

 

His outlook on life is very jaded. Well, I wouldn't say jaded, but I can say that he is very selfish. The reason I say that is because he refuse to believe the truth, and would make up his version of the truth. He then would make himself believe that is the truth. I don't understand that. He is also very anti-social which makes him very naive about the outside world. I have tried to help him be more sociable, but it didn't work, so I gave up.

 

I use to have hope for him, thinking that one day he will eventually come to his senses. However, what little hope I had in him is fading quite rapidly.

 

So, my question to everyone is, how can I make him see that by him acting like a baby can be just a turnoff to everyone? How can I get through to him that not only does that make him look like a dumbass, everyone in the family hates it when he does that?

 

Maybe he knows but refuses to recognize it. What a shame. Is he hopeless?

[rogueless]

I would advise that your brother see a therapist. I know this is very frustrating for you, but it is not your job to "change" your brother's odd behaviors. You are only wasting your time. He doesn't see anything wrong with what he is doing. He needs professional help, someone that is equipped to help him. I would also suggest that you move out of the house. Good luck

[Samson]

[color=green]WTF[/color]??????????????????????????

 

You're 24 and he's 25 and you're sharing a bedroom in your parents home?

 

And you're surprised that you are being driven mad?

 

What do you expect?

 

You're living a sketch on Saturday Night Live Episode!!!!!

[dudesomewhere]

seriously just do it, be mean...

 

Some people need that. Call him pizzaface and stuff like that. And I infer from your words that you guys are Chinese American? Tell him he gives Chinese people a bad nameBut also, has anyone confronted him about his behavior or just kept it all bottled up?

 

Ease up Samson...looks like they are together due to finances. Even so, extended living is no big deal nowadays...not to me. I don't live with anyone, though I do live with family...we are all on 10 acres. I know plenty of successful ppl who do live with family and that has more to do with taking care of someone or sharing burden in most cases.

 

"He refused to find a job, when he knows that our family is in a financial crisis."

 

Get some female relatives to tell him no female would date anyone who acts like he does.

[moimeme]

Call him pizzaface and stuff like that

 

This from the 'sensitive, kind, loving' etc etc blah blah guy?

 

Don't insult him. He can't help having a skin condition. But do get him to a therapist. He sounds like one of those people who wrongly believe that bugging people all the time is 'funny'. Since he doesn't seem to understand when you tell him that it's not amusing, perhaps he'll listen to an authority like a therapist.

[Samson]

Ease up Samson...looks like they are together due to finances. Even so, extended living is no big deal nowadays...not to me

.

 

No, I'll not "ease up."

 

Easing up has given these two, and many others the opportunity and excuse to be freeloaders; no job, and plenty of time to goof off (BTW; I reject that finances are tight arugent based on the fact that one is attending college and can afford to retake the same class X3!), and drive each other nuts. Obviously the extended living situation here is a large contributor to Drivenmad's situation, and changing it is clearly in DM's hands.

 

Now, it might be interesting to begin another thread about the subject of "Extended Family: Pros and Cons." Your situation might be OK (I'm not saying you are "freeloading," because I don't know what it (your deal on 10 acres) is.

[dudesomewhere]

doesn't mean what I do is right...as many of YOU have said...*nudge nudge*

 

on that note...it's also family. I wouldn't suggest that otherwise...but some siblings are just like that. I was talking to a friend who said that it was good a brother was so harsh...had he been like me it might not have sunk in.

 

I'm trying to picture how he acts and it's weird...crying like a baby when you're an adult. I thought I was the only one who was like that waaaaahhhhhh

 

hehe

[dudesomewhere]

if their financial situation is because the family is working to help this guy do it 3xs...

 

hell I worked 3 jobs to try and put myself through school. Him not wanting a job though...that's a slap in the face...damn. I've only known rich kids who acted like this...and being rich means no financial burden. But this family seems to be struggling...and maybe all for the "eldest" brother.

 

[moimeme]

You have to remember that sons are gold in some cultures and that families do make lots of sacrifices for them.

[eroq]

Are either of you paying rent to your parents yet!?! Mine told me, flat out when I left for college, was that as soon as I was out of college (graduated, failed, kicked out, etc.) that I would be paying rent if I came back to live at home. If I were you, I'd personally move out into an apartment or flat, either with some roommates or by myself if I could afford it. If you want to dish out some operant conditioning on your brother though, you could bring up his failed social life (or any other failing, in general) whenever he becomes annoying.

 

Example:

Him (in baby voice): Mommy mommy mommy milk food mommy milk food!

You: So how's that gf search going for you? I'm sure all the girls love the baby-talk...

 

The first few times you do it, make sure to be really long-winded and tear into him, but keep it on target of whatever your retort started with. Also, make sure that he doesn't have a chance to cut in and stop you, and keep going until all of the original energy of the baby-talk is dispersed. If you can and want to, keep going until you can cut the uncomfortable tension with a knife. Don't be nice during this phase, either. Let out anger with these rebuttals. The purpose of these first few times is to connect negative responses to his baby-talk. Connect his baby-talk to the reminder that he ISN'T out there, getting the ladies, or whatever he wants to do. Connect it to a feeling of others being angry at him. For the first three days at least, get him everytime he does it, and get him good.

 

After the first few days-week, you can begin to lay off on the tirades, and simply remind him with quick little one-liners whenever he does it. You get bonus points for zingers, because you get the rush of feeling quick and clever, and he'll get nailed in a new and different way. The point is that, now that you've embedded a negative response in his brain to the message, you just have to maintain and reinforce that response. Eventually, once the connection between the baby-talk and the negative emotions is strong enough, your brother should begin to stop the baby-talk.

 

I need to add, however, that punishment alone is not a good method of improving someone's behavior. It helps to discourage bad behaviors, but does nothing about creating good ones. So, during a time when he's not doing something annoying (even better is when he's not doing anything at all) take him out and do something with him. Bring him along when you're doing something with friends. Invite him to see a movie. Encourage good behavior while discouraging the bad. If you're going to involve yourself with his improvement, make sure it isn't just a bunch of punishments or you may end up with a worse brother than you had before.

 

 

Wow, I can be a heartless b**** when I want to be.

[mørkt selvmord]

well since he intends on acting like a 5 year old.. give him a new 'game' to play

 

who ever can act the most mature for the longest wins

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Rules:

1-) Stay quiet

2-) No waking up mum to inform that dad is home.

3-) Get your ass in gear and get a job (opt.)

4-) Go out and meet new people

 

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or you could make your own rules =/

 

for the skin condition try 'Clean and Clear Acne Cleanser' it's new. its a face wash. i use it and it works great.. lol. It just really dries up the skin though.. but itll go away after a week or two. show himhow to use it.