ekyd Posted November 28, 2012 Share Posted November 28, 2012 Basically, My girlfriend is going to her best friend's party on saturday night (it doesn't help that I really dont like or trust her best friend) and I just feel mega jealous about it. Anxious too. I'm 17 and she's 16 and I just keep getting worried that she'll get with someone while drunk or something. Plus I hate the fact she's out having a good time without me and I'm just sat at home on my own... I believe that you should talk things through with your partner so I told her how I was feeling and now she's pissed off with me and thinks i'm constraining her. Tbh I'd hate me too and I know there's nothing to worry about.. I just can't stop feeling overwhelmingly jealous... Does ANYONE else feel like this? I feel like such a horrible person. Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted November 28, 2012 Share Posted November 28, 2012 I was going to say that I can't imagine your GF would accept an invitation to go to a party that excluded you. Then how could a host exclude her guests BF. Then my brain realized that there are hosts with bad maners as well as shelfish GF's. And they can be in cahoots together where the host invited a guy your GF hash a crush on or a guy friend of the host has a crush on your GF. Either way you are not wanted there. Could be from bad manners to clear you out of the way for the new guy to flirt with. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted November 28, 2012 Share Posted November 28, 2012 Well dude, you're young and when you're young and in love you start to feel things a lot more intensely. These intense feelings are new to you. It's normal to feel jealous. It happens. And I think you were right in trying to communicate your feelings with her (your headed in the right direction on how to handle relationship, good job!). However, for her to fly off the handle without even trying to understand your feelings shows me a lot of immaturity. And rightfully so....you guys are kids. She doesn't know how to calm down and process your feelings, doesn't know how to understand where you're coming from or even compromise. Doesn't know how to ease your jealousy and reassure you that you're still the guy for her. Look, she's going to the party whether you like it or not. You're not married. I would just lay low. Don't contact her after the party, let her come to you. Let her do the talking. She obviously knows that her going to this party is bothering you. Let's see what she has to say. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ekyd Posted November 28, 2012 Author Share Posted November 28, 2012 thanks people that really helped I dont think there's anybody else tbh. I guess who knows. But as far as I can tell she's pretty besoted with me and we've been going out 17 months now. I just hope her knowing I feel weird about the whole thing doesn't trigger a rebellion... Yeah tbh i'd say she can be a fair bit less mature than me in certain circumstances, getting annoyed at me for the littlest things like debating which school party we should go to out of 2 on consecutive nights But at the end of the day I love her and she'll grow out of the immaturity I'll try and lie low, not text her no matter how much it kills me Link to post Share on other sites
GSB81 Posted November 29, 2012 Share Posted November 29, 2012 "she'll grow out of the immaturity" Some don't. I spent a year dating a 31 year old 18 year old. At 16 your girl is just getting started partying. Make no mistake, she will not care that you don't want her to go. She's already showing this. She will start bitching about how you are being controlling. How you don't trust her. She will say you're pushing her away. Her friends will have more influence on her than you will. They will cheer on bad behavior. You better get your ass to those parties. If she says you can't because you aren't invited, lay a guilt trip on her ONCE. If you can't get through to her, give her some of her own medicine. Sometimes the best way to get someone's attention is to mirror their bull****. Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted November 29, 2012 Share Posted November 29, 2012 Look, chances are you're not going to be with this girl for the rest of your life. And you're probably right, she may grow out of her immaturity. When that happens, her feelings could change for you and that's just life. Most of us are not with our first loves anymore. I know that I'm not. BUT! our first loves teaches us HOW to love. Believe me, there are going to be a lot of people that come in and out of your life so don't worry if it doesn't work out. You shouldn't have to worry about being tied down at such a young age. If it doesn't work out, There's nothing wrong with dating a lot of different girls. It helps you regonizes what type of girl is for you and you might be surprised that the type you're interested in is a total departure from the girl you're currrently dating. I know this post seems so negative. But, if you look at that big picture, it's really not. If your current relationship doesn't work out. This is just a reminder that it isn't the end of the world. Just hang in there. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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